Far Gone & Out
by R3-1 M4y3r
Summary: They were there for a lockdown, simply to help out the mother charter and Happy was looking forward to it. It was a way to let off some steam. He hadn't counted on Kozik to bring her in for protection. He also hadn't counted on caring about her being there. There was a lot of things he hadn't counted on.
1. Modus Tollens

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_**This story is completely stand alone and you won't have to read any of my other stories to follow what's going on in this.**_

_For the new readers: Let me know if you have any questions, I make it my business to always answer them. Also I'm on twitter R31M4y3r and I answer there as well. _

_**To my wonderful, patient and loyal readers**: Please don't despair. I'm still writing on all stories, 'Just Breathe' is included in that statement. The next publish will be for 'Brighten the Corner'. I'm not trying to confuse you but I'm assuming that most of you are reading a whole bunch of SOA-stories anyway so I'm sure one more won't make it more confusing._

_Like I've said earlier, I was not planning on writing another Happy-story but this one popped up and unlike some of the others, it didn't disappear and once I started thinking about it, it started sounded good. So... 'Give it a Day' is still priority until I'm done with it. I have all the chapters sorted and it shouldn't be that hard. I also have two or three more chapters for 'Brighten the Corners'. I'm currently researching the Tig story (lots of research on that one, It will be called 'Into Dust' btw) and finally, the poor 'Just Breathe'; I know where it's heading but it's a bit on the back burner. It will be finished sooner or later though, promise. I love Quinn and Lisa too much to let it go so no worries._

_As usual, the first chapter of a completely new story in a new setting is a bit longer. This takes place before the first season and is, to some extent, AU._

* * *

**1: Modus Tollens**

_a. The way that denies by denying_

_b: denying the consequent_**  
**

__-o0o-

Redwood had called for them the week before. It was a full blown war and it was reaching it's peak. Four of them had left from Tacoma. It was him, Happy, Lorca and Bowie. There had been some discussion on whether he should really go, considering the problems he had with Tig but he insisted. The only one who really knew why he insisted was Hap. All the clubs over the country was in lighter versions of lockdown from the next day and Redwood would go into full lockdown. Everyone had gathered anyone that could be in the slightest risk. Family, friends, girlfriends and ex-wives.

They were all set, all of them, except Kozik.

"Anyone we're missing?" Clay, the Redwood president asked and Kozik took a final look at Hap who refused to meet his eyes. 'Fucking chicken shit bastard,' Kozik thought and turned to Clay.

"Yeah. I need to get someone."

"Who?"

How the fuck did he explain this? "My cousin. We're close. Need to pick her up."

He could feel Hap's stare but ignored the fucker. He had his chance. Hell! He'd had a whole series of chances and had fucked up every single time. If he was to scared to do this, Kozik would.

"We're locking down tomorrow morning so you've got until then. And bring someone with you." Clay looked around the table. "That goes for all of you, you don't ride alone."

"Sure."

The meeting ended and he half expected Hap to attack him the second they stepped out of the chapel but he didn't. This would be the best lockdown ever. He would have to avoid both Hap and Tig while balancing that with the little lady he was on his way to go and get.

Chibs, Jax and Lorca volunteered to go with him to LA. Lorca jumped the opportunity to be honest, he probably had a hunch on who they were picking up.

-o0o-

They rolled up outside the huge house Joanna lived in. She didn't live there alone, as far as Kozik knew there were six other people living there crammed together. Four guys and two other girls. She'd been living with them for the last two years and they were all about working, surfing and partying. Detached and impersonal, the way she liked it. It was weird, she didn't get close to people, didn't want to, but she couldn't live alone and always managed to find people who wanted to live like this, doing exactly this. He'd asked he when she planned on growing up and she answered with a shrug and a smile.

He rang the door and it was opened by a tall, very tanned, blond guy. Obviously a surfer.

"Is Joanna in?"

"No. No idea where she is, haven't seen her in days."

Kozik really hoped this guy wasn't planning on picking up poker because he had the worst pokerface.

"I'm Kozik."

"Oh. Ok. I though..."

"I know what you thought. Is she in?"

"Nah. She's at the Drunken Huntsman." The guy gave him a smile. "Rent's due tomorrow and she wanted to cash in. Want directions?"

"I know where it is. You sent her there alone?"

"Dude! Course not! Two of the other's are there as well. Wouldn't let her go alone." He shrugged. "We all pitch in and if you know her, you know she's doing it for fun more than the money."

He shook his head and they went back to their bikes.

"Hooker?" Jax asked and Lorca huffed, shaking his head he looked at Kozik. By now he was sure of who they were picking up.

"She's a hustler," Lorca said and when Chibs gave Kozik a strange stare he shrugged.

"She is," he confirmed.

"Poker?"

"Pool."

-o0o-

Jax was really curious about this girl. He wasn't convinced she was Kozik's cousin but he was willing to play along for a while. Unless she seemed to be trouble it didn't really matter. If Kozik claimed she needed protection that was all it took. They'd bring her in.

It was a shitty fucking bar. Along the bar counter were ragged whores, some of them decent looking but most of them not. The inside room was filled with pool tables and they were all occupied.

"So who is it?" Jax asked and looked at the blonds with big tits. They looked like someone Kozik would know.

Lorca nodded towards the inner room. "She's probably in there."

Jax shrugged and they walked inside. There were mostly younger kids in there, looking like students or surfers and in the corner there was a brawl. No one were taking swings yet but it looked like it could easily get to that.

Three men were yelling at a woman. She maintained calm, talked to them but the guys behind her looked ready to have a go at anyone who got too close to her. It was getting out of hand and suddenly the woman grabbed a cue from the pool table and held it in front of her.

"Listen to me carefully. It's not my fucking fault that you can't play pool for shit. And now that you know you can't play pool for shit, maybe you should stick to jerking of in your dorms instead of thinking you can make an easy buck from a hard working woman."

Jax turned to Lorca. "Tell me it's not her."

"That's her," he said and confirmed Jax's suspicions.

She wasn't tall. She was skinny, hardly any tits, wearing jeans, martens, a tank top with a tight fitting vest above it. Her hair was short, dark and she was... not ugly but not beautiful either. Her nose was a bit too big and her mouth slightly crooked, skewed. Not a lot but you could see that the right side of the lower lip dipped further when she smiled even if it was more smirks that was on her lips at the time. Her entire appearance told you that no matter her size, she'd rip off you balls if you made a wrong move.

When she saw them she froze, before giving Kozik that big, crocked smile. Jax had to admit, that even if she wasn't a classic beauty, there was something about this girl and he was very, very curious about her and how she really knew Kozik.

"Herman, do I need to worry since you seem to have brought a small army with you?"

"Depends on what you're worried about," Kozik said and walked up to her, giving her a hug. "Long time since a saw you."

"Aw, you know why." She looked at the three men she'd been arguing with not a minute earlier. "Now, they're either here as my friend, and you're in trouble. Or they're here to have a go with me and these boys don't share. Either way, you're fucked."

They took the hint and disappeared.

"Still hustling I see."

"As long as men are suckers, I'll be hustling." She nodded towards the bar. "Wanna sit?"

"We're short on time. We need you to come with us."

"Shit." She shook her head and laughed. "Why?"

"We're bringing everyone in for a lockdown and being my cousin, I want you protected."

Her reaction made Jax sure even if it was damn subtle. If he hadn't been looking for it he'd missed it. Even so, she was not Kozik's cousin but she didn't protest. "Bring me, where?"

"Clubhouse in Charming."

"For how long?"

"Probably a week."

"I have a job, I can't just run off for a week."

"Call in sick. We can get you a medical certificate.**"**

Kozik dragged her further into the corner and they had a silent, private talk. Something he said made her stiff, she almost looked scared was reassured with a hug and she nodded. Jax was getting the distinct feeling that there was a lot more to this than he had guessed so far.

When they were done they came over, Kozik with his arm around her shoulder. She gave Lorca a careful hug and he mumbled something into her ear as well.

"I need to get some things from my house, I hope that's ok?" She looked at Jax when she said it and he nodded.

"Sure. Pack for a week." He put out his hand. "Jax."

Taking it, she smiled, "Joanna."

She had a quick word with the two guys she'd been with and then they finally walked out to the parking lot. They followed her old, shitty volvo to her house. Lorca and Kozik went with her inside and left him and Chibs alone.

"Any idea what this is really about?" Chibs said as he lit a smoke, sitting on his bike.

"Nope. But she's not his fucking cousin."

"No, she's not. Future Old Lady?"

"Doubt it. She knew Lorca as well, seems to have known them for a while. But there's definitely something fishy going on."

"I still think he wants to nail her."

"Maybe," Jax said with a shrug. Most guys would nail anything but she wasn't like the normal bitches hovering around the club spreading their legs to anyone asking. "She's not a sweetbutt."

Chibs laughed. "Don't think she's ever been one. And no smart person would hustle at a clubhouse. You need to be smart to make a livin' outta hustlin'."

"Sounded like she had some legit job as well." Not like she'd need a doctor's excuse from hustling. "Guess we'll have to wait to find out. I'll talk to Clay when we get back anyway."

The three of them came back out and Jax was surprised about the small duffel bag she was carrying. She had a backpack as well but even with that one she didn't seem to bring a lot.

"You know you're going to be away for a week?"

"Yeah?" she said as a confused question so Jax just turned to straddle his bike. Joanna got into her car and they took off.

-o0o-

Once she was finally alone in her car, Joanna let her mind wander. She was not happy about this at all and would've wanted to refuse. But just the fact that Kozik had sought her out told her that this was the real deal. She'd asked him if he thought her friends might be in danger since they shared address and all but he assured her that it wasn't the case. That they wouldn't have any interest in them and that even bringing her in was a mere precaution.

It felt weird to drive like this. She had two bikes ahead of her and two behind. Made her feel like the president or something and she giggled to herself when she thought of it. The giggle got stuck in her throat when she remembered where she was heading and that Happy would be there. When she had realized that it might be the case she asked Koz and he admitted that he was. When he saw her reaction he assured her that Hap wouldn't try anything, that no one even knew who she was, she'd still agreed. She wasn't as sure as he seemed to be that she'd be able to stay out of his way for a full week but still, if he'd gone through the trouble of bringing her in, Koz thought she might be in danger and that scared her more than Hap did.

Joanna hadn't seen him in almost five years, the last time being on her thirtieth birthday. It was a memorable night, for more than one reason.

-o0o-

Happy was sprawled out in the clubhouse couch, a beer in one hand and the other one around a blond with big tits. Really big tits and lots of curves. Tall too, basically all the things Jo wasn't, that should get to her. He knew he looked calm but his mind was racing.

When Chibs walked in he turned his attention _from_ the door. It took enormous willpower to do it but he managed. The blond, he seemed to remember her name being Tiffany, leaned towards him and asked him if he wanted to take it to his dorm.

He shook his head, "Later, baby."

Jax came over to talk to Clay who was in the armchair next to the couch.

"Any problems?" Clay asked.

"Nah, but I'd bet my left nut on her not being Kozik's cousin."

"He wouldn't bring in some bitch just to nail her. She's something to him."

Happy knew he clenched his jaws and turned his head to look towards the door. In the last five years he'd only seen one picture of her. The only one he'd kept. It was an old one from when she was in New York. It was taken of her mid laugh with big billboards behind her. All those features she had, in his head he'd turned them into something... ugly.

Everything in her face looked too big, the nose, the crooked mouth and the eyes. Even her eyebrows were big in the face that narrowed to a pointy chin. A perfect heart-shape his mom used to say. When he saw her now, he remembered that the most striking thing about her was her charisma and that it made you forget anything that could've been seen as a flaw.

Despite havnig the body of a teenage boy, the facial features that in some ways were all wrong, she had a charisma that could knock people down. He'd once told her that she had the ego and the balls of a six foot body builder in a small woman's body, she'd laughed and immediately agreed. It was easy to forget her size when you'd been around her for a while.

She didn't look that cocky now. Standing between Kozik and Lorca, taking in the room. She always did that and he knew she'd do fine. Her natural survival instinct made her blend in to every fucking environment she was in. You could drop her off anywhere and in a couple of hours she was all attuned to it.

Wherever she'd been hiding it wasn't far from here. Kozik hadn't been gone that long and when she reached for the bag he noticed the blue chalk on her fingers. Obviously she was still hustling, he shook his head, the bitch never learned. Hopefully she was still staying away from pickpocketing though.

-o0o-

Tig glared at Kozik and the bitch he just came in with. His cousin. He was so going to nail the shit outta that bitch just to piss Kozik off. He was going to make her scream his name loud enough for everyone to hear. Koz especially.

-o0o-

Kozik handed Jo her bag.

"I'll show you to my room."

"I'm staying in your room?" she said and Lorca laughed.

"We're cramped, Peanut. I promise to not bring any bitches in there and I'll sleep on the floor."

"Don't think she's the problem when it comes to her sleeping in your room," Lorca mumbled but not low enough because Jo heard it.

She made a face and glanced in Hap's direction, "Don't think he gives a shit." She took the bag. "Show me."

He couldn't help noticing Hap in the couch with the blond next to him and felt like walking up there and beat the shit outta him. It was so fucking obvious he did it to get to Jo. And if he knew it was the reason, so did she.

Walking Jo through the crowd he also noticed Tig's eyes on her. A battle between Tig and Jo would be something to see and he smirked at him and put his arm around Jo's shoulders. That would most certainly get Tig's attention and he'd go for her like a stud smelling a bitch in heat. It would be fun to watch and at the same time agitate Hap. Both of them deserved it.

Kozik didn't have any ulterior motives to bring Jo here, he just wanted her safe, but if he could get her and Hap to talk and at least sort some of their crap out, it would be good.

He unlocked the door and held it open. She stepped over the threshold and looked around.

"Lovely, Koz. Did you make an effort to make it smell like stale beer and pussy just for my sake?"

"Absolutely. Wouldn't want you to get the wrong impression of me."

She looked at the bed and sighed, "Any chance I can get clean sheets at least?"

"We're not going in to complete lockdown until tomorrow. I'll take you out so you can wash them and we can get something to eat."

"I'd like that," she said and thew her bag and backpack on the bed. When she turned around she took a deep breath. "Can you give me five minutes to... breathe?"

"Sure." He took a closer look. "You know he's just trying to piss you off."

"I know," she said with a nod. "He's always been... really good at pissing me off."

"He'd stop if he noticed that he was successful." Kozik wasn't exactly worried but he wanted this to be as easy as possible for her. Not that he wanted her to have a fit and have a go at Hap, that would be bad all around but she could at least look like she gave a shit. That would be enough for that proud prick.

"I know. Just don't want to give the fucker the satisfaction."

Kozik sighed. Jo acting like she cared wouldn't happen then. He was looking forward to this week about as much as he looked forward to drinking a bucket of bleach. It would be hell and he was starting to wonder if he hadn't overreacted. She might've not needed to come here. In fact, she might be in bigger risk being here than being in a bar full of drunk, huge men, hustling their money.

As he walked to the corridor, Hap came out of nowhere and shoved him against the wall.

"You fucking idiot."

"I'm not the fucking idiot and you know it. Just ignore her, I know you're good at that."

That was a flat out lie from Koz' side. Hap could never ignore Jo, ever, and it drove him insane when she did it to him. But it had been five years and the stubborn fuck had hardly ever mentioned her so maybe he could start now. He could see Hap clench his fist but instead of hitting he stepped back and walked away.

-o0o-

For a second Bowie was sure that the acid he'd dropped the week before was making him see things when the black haired woman came walking from the dorms. He shut his eyes and opened them again. She was still there.

"Peanut?"

She turned to him and when that very recognizable smile graced her face he was sure. It was her.

"Bowie!" Jo came up to him and gave him a hug. "How are you?"

"Fuck, girl! I thought I was seeing things."

"Been popping pills, have we?" she said and patted his cheek.

"One or two, maybe." He took her hand. "How the fuck did you end up here?"

"Kozik picked me up. Said it was best."

"He's right. I'm glad you're here." He looked at the bag of sheets she was holding in her hand. "Are you into steeling bedlinen now?"

"No. I'm washing them. No fucking way I'm sleeping in a bed full of this guy's juices." She nodded towards Kozik who came walking towards them. "Wanna tag along? We're getting something to eat as well."

Jo sleeping in Kozik's room? Nice, this could be really interesting and Bowie was definitely going to stay the fuck away from Hap this week. He wasn't going to stay away from Jo though and being on guard detail in the clubhouse suddenly sounded like a lot more fun. He'd missed her.

"I'll tag along," he said and picked up his things.

As he walked outside he noticed Hap's glares at him. What did the fucker expect? None of them had any idea why she took off and it wasn't like he told them shit. He wanted to talk to her so Bowie just glared back. Fuck him!

Once the bedding was in the wash they walked over to the diner on the other side of the street and they ordered food. Watching Jo order was always a blast. Despite being tiny, she ate a lot. She had the metabolism of a hummingbird.

"So, Peanut, where have you been?"

"Around. Lately I've been in LA. The last two years. The surf is great there."

"And Koz here has been in contact with you the enitre time?"

She didn't answer and when she looked at Koz he turned to Bowie.

"Just in case she needed help. It's not what you think."

"You don't even know what I think."

Koz wouldn't make a pass at her. Bowie knew that but keeping Jo from Happy was an all around bad idea. Not that he was sure if Hap had even looked for her. Since she disappeared he hadn't even heard him mention her and no one had dared to mention her to him.

"I've only kept him updated on where I've been. Nothing else, Bowie." She turned to the laundromat. "I'll just dash over there and put it all in the drier."

Koz got up as well. "No walking around by yourself. Watch the food." The last part was to Bowie and he nodded.

He heard Jo chant 'Clean sheets, clean sheets,' on her way and he shook his head. Once they were gone he leaned back and picked up the phone to call Lee.

"_What's up?"_

"Just want to make sure you know that Kozik had picked up Jo for the lockdown."

"_Yeah, I just heard. He said she was his cousin in church. Lorca filled me in."_

"Think we should tell them the truth?"

"_Fuck me if I know. Not sure what would piss that grumpy fuck more; them knowing or not knowing."_

"Does it matter what they think? Not like she's a risk."

"_I'm gonna have to talk to Clay at least. His club, his decision."_

"Yeah. We'll be back soon. She just put the sheets in the drier."

"_What?"_

"She's washing Kozik's sheets." Bowie had to admit it, he loved this and he couldn't wait to drop the bomb on Lee.

"_Why?"_

"She's sleeping in his room."

There was a long silence._"Is he on drugs again?"_

"Imagine that. I was thinking the same." He saw them coming out of the laundromat again. "We'll be back soon."

-o0o-

Lee hung up the phone and took a deep breath. He located Hap in the couch with a blond clinging to him. Clay was in church with Jax so he went inside.

"Need to have a word, if you got a moment."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with Kozik's _cousin_?"

"Yeah. It does."

-o0o-

Joanna was very happy about the clean sheets. Just the thought of sleeping in Koziks cum- and sweat stained sheets had made her sick. She'd already decided to use the time the next day to clean the room. It was filthy and smelled really funky.

Hap was in the couch with the same blond in his lap and she didn't stop to take a closer look, only kept on walking towards the rooms.

"Jo!" someone yelled and when she turned around she saw Lee in the door to what she assumed was the chapel.

"Hi!"

"Come here a sec."

"Can I just take these back to the room?" She held up the paper bags with the clean sheets.

"Give 'em to Koz. He'll take them." He turned to Hap in the couch. "You too."

With a swallow she handed the things to Koz before following Lee into the room. There were two other men in there, already waiting for them. One had been with Koz when he picked her up and she'd noticed that he was the VP. The other was the president, judging from his patch, and she had a vague memory of him being called Clay.

Hap came in and closed the door behind him. He had lipstick on his neck and underneath his ear and when he saw her looking, he smirked. Joanna focused on Lee again.

"I explained to Clay and Jax and we want to know if we're going to have a problem with the two of you being in the same clubhouse?"

"No," Joanna immediately answered without looking at Hap.

"No," Hap said after a brief pause. "Why would you?"

"That would've been a little more convincing if the two were able to look at each other," Clay said while looking at them. "Just stay the fuck away from each other and I'm sure we'll be fine."

"Sure. We've been good at that so far," Joanna said with a smile and it grew when Hap growled next to her.

"Hap, stay for a sec. You can go," Lee said the last part to Joanna and she walked past Hap without looking at him.

"Joanna!" It was Clay and she turned in the doorway. "I'll have my wife introduce herself to you later. She'll show you the ropes."

"Good," Joanna said before walking out, closing the door behind her.

The Tacoma charter had quite a few Old Ladies, one more of a dragon bitch than the other. It had taken her some time but she got along with most of them after a while. Getting that shit to work in less than a week was more of a problem.

-o0o-

After repeatedly saying that it wasn't a problem that the bitch was there and that he could do his job, he was finally released. He slumped down in the couch again and saw her in the bar, next to Kozik. They were talking and the two of them together at a bar counter, talking to each other, reminded him of the first time he saw her.

-o0o-

He and Kozik had finished a job in Vegas and wanted some drinks. They went to a bar without the cuts, simply to get some fucking quiet and no bitches hanging around their necks. Leaving the cut behind wasn't something they did often but it happened, when they needed to wind down. Being in Vegas mean that they'd been knee deep in prime pussy for a week so bar skanks wasn't high up on their list of interests.

They'd downed a few beers and all the time Happy had a tingling sensation in the back of his neck. When he looked around he saw a woman at a table in the corner. She briefly looked at him before turning her eyes from him and she kept looking around in the bar. He'd seen that before. Hell, he'd done that before. She looked like a predator looking for prey but he still quickly forgot about her. She'd been smart enough to rule him out so she wasn't his problem.

He was reminded about her again when she stood up and walked over to the bar. She was a bit unsteady, drunk, and for a second he wondered if he'd been wrong and just paranoid, seeing shit that wasn't there. She was skinny, black long hair, big nose and mouth. Nothing special at all and if he hadn't seen her study people earlier he wouldn't have looked twice.

She bought a beer and on her way over to the pool table she stumbled a little and giggled. Two frat boys immediately honed in on her and called her over to play a game. When she started to play Happy's sensors went up again. And it dawned on him that he hadn't been wrong at all. She lost a few games but that only made him more certain and when a big pile of money was laid up on the table, he leaned forwards and chuckled. She was good.

"What's up?" Kozik asked and turned around to see what had caught his attention.

Happy nodded towards the woman with the frat boys. "She's hustling them."

"Any good?"

"Very." It was only the fact that he by chance had seen her scanning the room earlier that had tipped him off.

When she won she grabbed the pile of money and walked towards the bar on impressively steady feet for someone who could hardly walk about an hour earlier.

"I'm gonna have a word," Koz said and got up to walk towards the bar and the woman standing in it.

Happy kept looking and could hardly believe his fucking eyes when she bumped into Koz as he walked away and he was pretty fucking sure she just lifted the horny idiots wallet. Koz didn't even seem to notice but Happy was sure. She wasn't just a hustler, she was a pickpocket as well. He chuckled when Koz sat down with a satisfied smile.

"I think I'm halfway there. She's skinny, not that pretty but... she's got something. Bet she's great lay. Wild." He looked so smug and when Happy laughed he glared at him. "You don't believe me? She wants me, I'm telling you. She just needed the bathroom then she'd coming over here."

Happy shook his head, got up and caught the girl on her way to the bathroom, and without a doubt some backdoor she knew was there. He grabbed her arm.

"Big mistake," he said as he shoved her inside the toilet. "And the only reason I'm not going to kill you is that we're not wearing our cuts."

That caught her attention and she looked terrified, "Cuts? Like in vests?"

"Like in vests," he confirmed. He held out his hand. "Hand it over."

After roaming through her bag she gave him four wallets, a lot of loose cash, a pocket watch, some wrists watches and a fucking necklace. All the time while filling his hands she kept apologizing, saying she didn't know they were bikers, that she wouldn't have tried anything if she'd known, over and over again. Rambling.

He laughed at the pile in his hands, "I don't give a shit about all this crap, I just want my friends wallet."

She looked up at him with big eyes. "Oh. Ehrm. The blond guy?" She looked down in his hands. "Do you know what it looks like?"

He took Koz wallet. "Hold your bag open." When she did he poured the rest back in it. "What's your name?"

"Miranda." She looked at him and if he hadn't known her type he might've believed her.

"What's your real name?"

She was quiet for a few seconds, looking down in her bag. "Joanna" She looked up at him. "My name is Joanna. Tell your friend I'm sorry."

"Don't be. He should've noticed."

"Are you really letting me go?"

"Sure." He shrugged. She'd kept him very amused the entire time she'd been in the bar and he didn't care if she stole some fucking wallets as long as it wasn't his or Koz'. Besides, they didn't have the cuts on. Couldn't expect the girl to be a psychic even if she'd been smart enough to wait with Koz' wallet until last. "I'll let you go if you tell me how the hell you managed to lift fucking necklace."

With a smile she moved closer, got up on her toes and when her, quite big, nose got closer he leaned down with a smile. She put her hand on his cheek and with the other she moved his hand up to her waist.

"I got really close," she mumbled and he smiled. Grabbing a hold of his necklace and took a step back.

"If I ever see you again I'll keep an eye on you," he said and took another few steps back. When he turned around to leave her he heard a laughter behind him. Turning back his eyes widened. She was holding his watch.

"Sorry. Couldn't help myself."

"Fucking hell!" He laughed and couldn't help notice that she was quite sexy when she wasn't terrified. "How the fuck did you do that?"

She handed it back to him. "You were focusing on your necklace and my hand on your cheek. No the other wrist."

He shook his head again, took his watch. "Next time, I'll strip you naked before I let you go."

"Look forward to it," he heard her yell behind him when he left her to get back into the bar.

"Where the fuck did you go?" Koz said as he sat down at the table.

Happy threw the wallet on the table. "To get your wallet back."

"What the fuck!" Koz took it and looked inside. Happy could see when it dawned on him. At first he got pissed and then he laughed. "She lifted it?"

"Yup."

"I didn't notice. Fuck, she must be good."

"Very. Took the watch from my wrist."

"Hustler and pickpocket. Now I really want to get some of her. That pussy's gotta be something."

Happy smiled and leaned back. There were a lot of reasons why he wanted to meet Joanna again. Stripping her naked was only one of them. Picking pockets was a dying art and she was good. She must've had one hell of a teacher and he wanted to know who.


	2. Nosus Decipio

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_You guys are amazing, thank you for all those favs, follows and reviews! Amazing and I hope I can meet your expectations on this story. A special thank you to the guest reviewers since I can't thank you in person._

_I also want to thank **Simone Santos** for all her help and support on this story! Make sure you check out her stories as well!_

* * *

**2: Nosus Decipio**

_We cheat_**  
**

__-o0o-

Tig was trying to figure out why the fuck Kozik found this bitch even remotely interesting. He'd heard she wasn't his cousin and that meant he was tapping her. There wouldn't be any other reason for him to bring her in if he wasn't. And definitely no other reason for him to have her in his room. But she wasn't Koz's type at all. Not Tig's either. Skinny, no tits, no hips, you could probably play her ribs like a xylophone. It didn't matter though, if it pissed Kozik of he'd fuck her. In all positions.

At the moment she was sitting curled up in the couch, reading a book while now and then looking at the hangarounds playing pool. Tig picked up a beer from the bar and walked over to her.

"See you watching the game." He sat down next to her and gave her a smile. "You play?" he asked, pointing at the pool table.

She shrugged and accepted the beer he was handing her. "I'm familiar with it."

"Ever played?"

"Sure. Who hasn't played pool?" she said with a smile, finally putting the book down and taking a sip of the beer while looking at him. Dark brown eyes he noticed. There wasn't a single thing on her that was anything Kozik should like.

"Wanna play?"

She looked at him again. "What's your name?"

"You can call me Tig, doll." He gave her his best smile. "What's your name?"

"Joanna." With a meaning smile she pointed at the table. "It looks occupied, or do you have a more private table?"

He laughed at the last part and suddenly realized that it wouldn't take much work. She was a horny bitch and Tig was always up for some easy pussy. Smooth sailing. Didn't really matter what they looked like. The perk included in fucking this one was that Kozik got pissed, he'd even make an effort to give her some orgasms for that. To make sure she screamed his name.

"No. This is the only one." He stood up and held out his hand. When she took it he pulled her out of the couch. "But don't worry, doll, I'll make it available."

He got rid of the hangarounds and set up the table for them. She wasn't half bad but he still won. When Kozik came over to watch he turned to her and held up a twenty.

"How about making this a bit more interesting? We bet twenty each."

"My momma always told me to not play about money." She said jokingly with a shy smile while spinning the cue in her hand and she looked... so innocent. He was going to enjoy this. "And I don't have much money to play with."

"Aww, doll! A twenty, that's hardly money. That's pocket change."

She shrugged and pulled put a twenty from her pocket to put over his on the side of the table. He kept the game even game but he let her win. That was a part of the game. Step two;

"You just beat me. I think you played more than you're letting me know." She blushed a little and looked down at her shoes. "How about another game? Give me a chance to win my twenty back. You've got nothing to loose."

She shrugged again with a shy smile and suddenly he started to see the appeal she must've had on Kozik. Walking around the table in her tight jeans that hugged her ass and those blushing cheeks, she was pretty hot. Her big, adoring eyes that so often looked straight into his was intriguing. She wanted him and the smile that she gave when she put a twenty in her pocked made him realize she needed the money. This was almost to easy.

He was really looking forward to having her warm his bed that night. The way this was going he'd get her there in no time. By the time he got to the bet he really was after, she'd think she had a chance to win. And the bet would be very favorable. Basically, he'd make her an offer she couldn't refuse. Like a win win situation.

The small detail that she kept drinking the beers he was giving her helped and after rubbing up on her a couple of times and her not protesting he was really getting a whiff of that victory. Now and then he glanced at Koz and he didn't look happy. It was all around awesome and he was already sporting a half boner.

When she won the second game and with a happy smile shoved the money into her pocket; it was time for the final blow. He picked up a wad of cash from his pocked.

"Final game, Sweetheart_._" He leaned closer to her, holding the cash in his hands just in front of her eyes. It was a lot of money. "If you win, you get _all_ of this." He waved the money in front of her face and she couldn't take her eyes of it.

"I don't have that much money." She still looked so innocent but couldn't take her eyes of the money. That cheep fuck Kozik probably kept her on a short leash. Keeping her secret, short on cash, only got her out to get some pussy now and then. The girl was dying for a proper dick, he could smell it.

"I'm sure you got something I'd like," he looked over her body, she was pretty damn hot when he thought about it. When she blushed he gave her a knock out smile. "If _I_ win, you sleep in my room tonight, not Kozik's."

"Sleep?" Her eyes were back on the money.

"Won't have to do anything you don't want to. Just have to sleep in there." He moved even closer. "On the other hand, you've won every damn game so far so I don't think you have to worry. It's just for fun and I'm feeling generous with my money today. I've had a good day." And it was getting so much better.

She finally looked at him with insecure eyes. There was a hard swallow and she once again looked at the money. "Ok. But I won't have to... I'll just sleep?"

"Just sleep, baby," he confirmed. He was pretty sure he could get her out of her clothes in no time. This bitch wanted him. During the entire conversation she hadn't once looked at Koz, he had her full attention and when she nodded and turned towards the pool table he smirked at Koz. He really looked pissed.

When the game started he was confident but then something strange happened. The better he played, the luckier she got. She did one crazy stunt after another. Twice when she missed with a cute giggle, that fucking cue ball ended up in the equivalent of pool table Siberia. Basically in the middle of fucking no where with no available shots.

The third time it happened he swore out loud and looked at her. He could see her jaws tense and then she laughed. It wasn't a giggle, it was a laugh and when she noticed his stare she shook her head.

"I'm sorry."

He couldn't stop staring. She didn't look a least bit innocent anymore and it slowly dawned on him what had happened. He turned to Koz and saw the smile on his face and then Tig laughed. He couldn't' fucking help himself. She'd played him while making him think he was playing her. And she had done it with such ease and grace that he had to admire her for it.

"Is Joanna even your real name?" he finally managed to say

"Yeah, it is." She put her hand in her pocket. "I'm sorry. You put me in a bad spot here and..." She dug her front pocked and unfolded two twenties, holding them towards him. "I believe these are yours. And as a peace offering I'll have a beer with you."

"You've had several beers."

"Just one to be honest." She pointed at Bowie, "He might need some help to get to bed tonight though."

Tig laughed again. "You switched?"

"Yeah." She looked at him with a hesitation radiating from her. "Are we ok?"

"Depends. Gonna tell me how an idiot like him picked you up?" He pointed at the now laughing Kozik.

"He didn't. Sure you don't want your money? I'm not in the habit of hustling guys in cuts."

"I'd say you earned them, considering I tried to hustle you." He looked at Koz again. "So you're really his cousin?"

"Not really, but I'm not his pussy if that's what you're really asking."

"So I might be able to convince you to sleep in my room anyway?"

She laughed. "As tempting as the offer is, I'm going to have to decline." She held out his money again. "_Sure _you don't want this?"

"Nah, what other talents to do you have?"

"Pickpocketing."

"Really. Any good?" He'd met a lot of people who claimed to be good a pickpocketing but none in her age and very few who actually were but in this case he'd bet a lot of money that she was good at that too.

"Yes. I'm very good."

"Fucking hell. That's a dying art, especially among people your age."

"I'm thirty five."

He took a closer look. When he knew and she didn't have that 'scared girl among bikers'-look, he could see that she was around thirty. Her size and all that innocent play was what had made her look younger. That's when it dawned on him.

"It was you. You helped out in the Tacoma charter, years ago. Some fucking pocket watch at an opera."

"Yeah, that was me," she looked away and it was obvious she didn't want to talk about it.

He couldn't remember the details but it had been a request from Redwood to Tacoma and they'd handled it really well. There had been some questions about them taking in an outsider for help but it was done so well they didn't really argue about it.

"Have to say, girl. You're good."

"I know." She pointed towards the bar. "So. I'll let you try to get me into bed for a while longer while we drink as an excuse. How does that sound?"

"Sounds really good." He put an arm around her.

He found it surprisingly easy to forgive her. He'd started it and like she said, she was in a bad spot and had handled it great. He wasn't convinced she felt as bad about it as she made it look like. It was probably more to make him feel better about it but she did it well. He'd still fuck her if she let him and he wanted to know more about her skills.

"How are you at lock picking?" he asked.

"I suck."

-o0o-

Happy watched Tig put an arm around Jo and walk her to the bar. It pissed him off. He hadn't been worried when Tig made a move at her. And he'd seen her in action too many times to think for a second she'd loose or that she didn't know what Tig was doing.

It had been pretty fun to see her work again. She'd handled it good. Especially pretending to loose her act and let him catch her doing it. She'd never lost her act for as long as he'd known her, unless she was supposed to. This time it was just to let Tig keep his dignity.

Something bothered him though, it had nagged in the back of his head for a while and now it became obvious. She was sleeping in Kozik's room?

He looked at Koz. "Where are you sleeping?"

"In my room."

That annoyed Happy. Koz had never since that first night even hinted that he had a boner for Jo. They'd been friends, close friends, When Happy fucked up, Koz had been there for her but not ever had he tried to push up on her. This was different. Even if Jo didn't think so, she was still his and all his brothers should stay the fuck away. Koz included. And having her sleep in your room was not 'staying away'.

"So you're sleeping where she's sleeping. You think I'm ok with that?"

"One; I find it hard to think you give a fuck. And two; this is all you own fucking fault."

"How is this _my_ fault?"

"You could just let go of her. Not leave her hanging." Koz got up but before leaving he turned to him. "All things considering, it would be the decent fucking thing to do. Not that you've ever been decent to her."

"Fuck you!" he yelled after Koz.

He'd been decent to her. Most of the time. He'd fucked up too but all in all, he'd been really fucking decent.

-o0o-

Joanna had another beer with Tig. Two even. She was supposed to support hate him for Koz' sake but it was hard. He was a charming bastard when he wanted to. Even more so when he wasn't trying to get her into bed. Or at least not trying as hard.

She had planned to just stay out of the radar for the first couple of days and when Tig had approached her was just going to share a beer with him and sneak off. That was until she realized that this was Tig and the he wasn't going to let her do that. He was out to get to Kozik so she needed to make her point. That she wasn't Kozik's and that she knew what he was doing. Preferably without humiliating him and as far as she could tell, the managed to get out of that predicament pretty smoothly.

"I'm going to bed," she said and jumped down from the chair. "But it was nice talking to you, just don't tell Kozik I said that."

"I'm gonna tell him the second you leave this room, baby."

"Had a feeling you would." When he reached for her she gave him a hug. "I'm guessing I'll see you tomorrow."

"Sure will. And I'll have another crack at that chastity belt."

"I know that saying 'good luck' would be the nice thing to do but I think I'll skip that."

Tig laughed as she walked away, she stopped to say goodnight to Koz before heading to the room. When she stepped inside she saw an air mattress on the floor but that was it. She threw one of the pillows and a blanket there as well before brushing her teeth and basically passed out on the bed. It had been a long day. A shitty day and despite not thinking it would, being around Happy had been draining.

-o0o-

The second time Joanna met Happy had been another coincident. She'd been at the mall when she felt a hand on her shoulder and had his raspy voice in her ear.

"Shopping, lifting or shoplifting?"

She turned around and stared into his chest before turning her eyes up to meet his. "I'm offended! You think I'd shoplift? That's for kids or unskilled thieves. Pathetic." He met her stare and she held up her bags. "Shopping," she said to answer his question.

"In cash?"

"Yes. In cash." She looked at him and down into his empty hands. Not that she though he'd be caught dead holding a brightly colored plastic bag from a shop but he was at a mall after all. "I see you're not a big spender."

He ignored her comment and instead pointed at a column near by.

"There's a sign there warning for pickpockets."

"Yup, this is the golden spot."

"How's that?" he asked and moved closer. "Shouldn't you stay away from those signs?"

"You're thinking forewarned is forearmed?" He nodded and he was definitely in her personal space now. "What do you think people do when they see the sign?"

He wrinkles his eyebrows at first but she could see when it dawned on him. And when he got it he turned around to stand next to her and they stood they quiet for a while.

"They're all checking to make sure they still have their wallets," he said and she could hear the laughter in his voice.

Whenever Joanna saw a sign like that she tried to find a place close to it to sit and watch. Almost everyone instinctively made sure they still had their wallet and any other valuables left when they saw the sign. Patting their pockets or bags. She memorized their face and where they moved their hands. She also looked around whenever one of the announcers warned for pickpockets to do the same thing. It was reflex imbedded in her bones by the man who trained her.

"Yeah. But I'm leaving now. You look far to intimidating so you're blowing my cover."

He eyed her. "Come on."

"What?"

"Come on. I'm taking you with me."

"What! Why?"

"You've been too close to me and like I told you; I'll strip you naked this time before I let you go." He shrugged. "To make sure you don't have anything of mine."

Joanna looked at him. This time he had his cut on and he'd looked scary even without it. A scary looking guy with a big reaper on his back.

She would've never taken that wallet if she knew that the guy was a Son. She wasn't suicidal. And she was honestly a bit annoyed that she hadn't figured it out. When she saw them at their table she pegged them as high risk and was planning on leaving them alone but when the other guy came up and made a pass at her in the bar she lifted his wallet.

She'd been on her way to the runner in the back alley when he'd interrupted her and she' lifted it after boosting his ego a bit to make sure he wouldn't suspect her when he noticed it was gone. The plan had been to go back to the bar after leaving the stolen stuff with her runner and if it got noticed that people had lost stuff, she could show an empty bag.

When this guy pushed her into the toilet and told her, not only that he knew what she'd done, but that he would've killer her if they'd been wearing their cuts, she was terrified. She had a bag full of hot goods and the only security, her runner, was a teenage kid that wouldn't have been able to do shit even if he did notice her predicament. Which wasn't likely since she was still inside the bar.

The conversation had quickly turned into something else and to be honest, she'd been really damn horny by the time it ended.

And since she was admitting things to herself; she was damn horny now as well.

"I'm just.. a bit curious," she said and took a step closer. "You're planning on taking off all my clothes?" He nodded. "Here?"

"I can do it at your place," he had a completely serious face. Like they were discussing the weather, not her naked.

"And then you'd leave? Confident that I haven't taken anything. Nothing else?"

"Depends. If I fuck you, will you tell me who trained you?"

She laughed. "No. I wouldn't. And I don't think I want to tell you where I live either." Trainers were trade secrets and he probably knew that. He was just pushing her buttons. "So, unless you want to drag me to a fitting room or simply rip my clothes right where we stand, I'm guessing this is good bye."

He kept looking at her, still with that intense stare and she finally succumbed and spoke again. "Or?"

"I'm thinking," he mumbled and his eyes were all over her body. Finally he took a step back. "I'll leave them on. This time."

When he walked away she took a few deep breaths. That had been intense. Very intense. And it had been some time since a guy managed to turn her on like this by merely talking to her. Admittedly; it had been very suggestive talk but it was still impressive.

Joanna wasn't an idiot. This was a dangerous guy and she should stay away from him. Unfortunately, Joanna was also the kind of girl who took calculated risks and she was sure he could make her cum like a fucking freight train. If all she wanted out of him was orgasms and she stayed out of his pockets, she'd could be fine. And she would have eally good sex, she was sure of the last part at least.

* * *

_Pickpockets quite often work in pairs. Sometimes one distracting and one lifting. Sometimes the other part (or the third) is a "runner". They leave the stoled goods with that person who takes it to a safe place. This is more common when they work a full place, like a mall, airport or a train station. This is basically to not walk around with too much valuables or wallets. It's also safer in case someone gets suspicions. They'll be more of these terms coming up and I'll try to explain as much as possible but let me know if you have any questions._


	3. Jus Ad Bellum

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_You are all awesome! Thank you so much for all the follows, favs and alerts. As always; a special thank you for the guest reviews since I can't thank you in person. If you have any questions, let me know._

_A super special thank you to **Simone Santos** who is being the biggest help on this story. Like a Beta but if there's spelling or grammar mistakes it's in no way her fault. She's the one I'm bouncing ideas off and she's great. **THANK YOU!**_

* * *

**3: Jus Ad Bellum**

_A set of criteria that are to be consulted before engaging in war, in order to determine whether entering into war is permissible_

-o0o-

Gemma walked into the bar from the room she was currently sharing with Clay. By the looks of it, the party had been going on until pretty late but she also noted that it was just hangarounds and croweaters who were passed out all over it. The members had at least made it to their beds. They knew the stakes and wouldn't get blasted and hungover at a time like this.

Clay had been in the room around twelve. With her keeping the place running and he doing his shit they hadn't had time to talk and he had some really fucking disturbing news. The killer apparently had an ex-wife. An ex-wife that _Koz _had thought it would be a good idea to bring to the clubhouse for a week long lockdown. And now she wanted to know why Happy hadn't thought about it and why the fuck she was in Kozik's room.

Clay also wanted her to make sure that the bitch end of the problem was contained so the killer's eyes on the target and not the bitch. No matter what that meant. Whatever it took because they didn't have time for pussy problems at the moment. If needed, she'd make damn sure that little lady ended up in the killers bed, keeping him content for the full fucking week.

According to Clay she needed to be careful because the woman, Joanna, was smart. Gemma wasn't worried, she could control these girls, it was her job as to keep them in check so they in return kept their men satisfied and focused. She picked up a cup of coffee. Even if Joanna was in Koz' room, Gemma wanted to see what mood Hap was in. So she had one stop before getting the girl for at least half a day of poking around.

She knocked on Happy's door and when he opened she nailed him down with his eyes.

"Is she here?"

"What?"

"Joanna. Clay wanted me to introduce myself to her today." She gave Hap a big smile. "Keep her entertained."

"Why the fuck would she be here? She's in Koz' room." He slammed the door shut and not even the Killer normally dare to do that to her.

It was all she needed, this was a very sore spot and he was not in a good mood. Gemma smiled to herself. This would be very interesting and it definitely needed to be contained. She wasn't that worried about Hap though. He'd put all that anger to good use as long as he directed it in the right direction. He was good at that.

She continued down the corridor to Kozik's room. After knocking on it, the door was opened by Koz in just his boxers. "I'm looking for Joanna."

He moved to the side and looked into the room. "Jo! You've got a visitor."

The woman in the bed stirred around before sitting up. It was one skinny bitch and considering what women she'd seen Hap with before, this was a surprise. Gemma notice the air mattress on the floor and that it had been used so at least Koz wasn't nailing the skinny hussy.

"I'm Gemma and you're with me today. Or at least half the day." She walked past Kozik and handed Joanna the cup. "Hope black is ok."

"Sure. Can I take a shower first?"

"I'll be in the bar." She turned around and walked out. She'd seen what she needed to see in the room. "Don't take to long."

It didn't take the little lady that long before she came walking in rolled up jeans, working boots and a t-shirt. She had a leather jacked over her arm as well. She halted in front of Gemma.

"I'm guessing we're heading out," she said and looked around at the mess.

"Yes we are. Got some shopping to do."

She still thought that Clay was overreacting about all this but he had a thing about Hap. He liked him and found him very useful so he wanted him at his best. He was also worried that Joanna would cause other trouble among the Tacoma-boys so if this is what Clay wanted, she'd do it.

They spent most of the day together and Gemma wasn't sure what to make of Joanna. She was much too smooth and it was starting to raise Gemma's alerts. She knew the right answer to anything but there was no way to know what she really felt or thought about things. She slid past the uncomfortable questions and managed to say things about herself that had no value what so ever. When asked about Hap she shut down completely with a 'not much to say, it's been five years'.

Basically, Gemma didn't trust her for shit. If this was just her natural way or if she was trying to hide whatever she was up to, was another thing. Gemma leaned agains hiding because the Hap-issue was obviously to raw for her to be able to hide if she talked about it.

Once they were back at the clubhouse, they unpacked the shopping, made some coffee and Gemma pointed at a table. "Sit down." Handing her a coffee she sat down opposite her.

"Thank you," Joanna said and poured enormous amounts of milk into the cup.

"It doesn't look like my black coffee was all that popular this morning."

"Don't care what I get in the morning, as long as it's caffeine."

Gemma leaned back and looked at Joanna. It was time to bring out the big guns.

"How about we cut the crap and get to the point?"

A smile spread on her lips. "Ok."

"Why are you here?"

"Kozik said I should come. That it would be safer for me."

"Anything going on between you and Kozik?"

"No. Absolutely not." Gemma hadn't thought there was but she wanted to see her reaction and she was pleased.

"And you didn't come here to get Hap back?"

"No." She sighed. "I know it's your job to take care of them. I'm not here to fuck him up. Kozik wanted me safe. He said they'd been targeting relatives, girlfriends."

Now they were getting to the point. "Why wouldn't Hap contact you and ask you to get here or go up to Tacoma before Kozik did? You're _his_ ex-wife after all." She smirked. Hap having been married was a surprise to say the least.

"We haven't talked to each other in five years." She took a sip from the cup and looked around before putting it down.

"Out of curiosity, how the fuck did you get him to marry you?"

"It was... a deal. Sort of. None of us were really the marrying kind. That's why he agreed."

"A deal?"

"We... were..." She didn't finish the sentence. "It was a complicated relationship."

"Aren't they all?" Gemma lit a smoke and kept staring at the woman. "So why didn't he bring you in?"

"He didn't know where I was. I guess. You'll have to ask him but I'm guessing my safety wasn't something he gave a shit about."

_There!_ That's what she'd been waiting for. Some fucking emotion and this was Joanna being pissed that Hap didn't care.

Happy came in and when he saw Joanna at the table he halted. For a split second. Then he continued like it hadn't happened. Joanna pretended he wasn't there before she gave Gemma a shaken, crooked smile.

"If it's ok with you, I think I'll clean the room now."

"Sure. Cleaning supplies are in the room behind the bar."

"Thank you." She got up and walked right past Happy with a blond in his lap, not even looking twice but Gemma didn't miss the tension in her neck.

Clay had been right. The two of them could be a problem.

Hap was a frequent visitor in Charming. He had his mom in Bakersfield and he always stopped by when he went to see her. He was a loyal member, one of the most loyal and he did what he was asked. He didn't aspire to get higher in the ranks and was content with being a soldier knowing that he was a good one.

She'd never heard of and Old Lady or even a regular girl, and guessed that he'd kept her a secret on purpose for her safety and that made her more convinced that him not picking her up for this either meant that he really didn't care or that he didn't want her around for other reasons. Judging by the little show the two of them just put up, he cared. A lot. At least now.

-o0o-

Joanna waited for Koz in his room and when he came inside she stood up.

"That is one sly bitch."

"Gemma?" When she nodded he laughed. "How did it go?"

"Don't know. Don't think I'm home free. Far from it. She's gonna dig until she's satisfied and she's not yet." She looked up at him. "How much shit am I really in, just for being here?"

"This isn't your problem or your fault." He gave her a hug. "Saw him with that blond again."

"I can handle this. That," she waved in the general direction of the bar," shit his pulling to get to me. I can handle it."

"I can see that," the sarcasm was dripping out of his mouth.

"I mean; I can handle it to the level that I won't explode in public. I didn't say it didn't get to me."

It got to her, a lot more that she would've thought before she came here. Seeing him, being this close to him and all the time knowing he was this close; It was getting to her. If he tried something other than piss her off with by parading around pussy it would be a problem.

If her tried talk to her or get close to her, she wasn't sure she'd be able to resist. She might not trust him anymore but she still loved him, that was already painfully obvious to her. The only thing that kept _her_ from trying anything was that he was behaving like a complete ass and she wanted to hit him whenever she looked at him. Or at least whatever blond he was rubbing up on at the time.

Koz was still holding her. "It's ok, peanut." When she looked up at him he kissed her forehead. "You know him. Let him get it out of his system and then he'll be reasonable."

"That's what I'm afraid of." She leaned her head on his shoulder. "The reasonable Hap is a lot scarier to me than this... hormonal, horny teenage boy version of him."

He laughed and hugged her. "You could just stay in this room the entire time. I'll get you food." He was teasing her so she took step back and hit him in the chest. "Aoch. You're doing good. And I know you can do this."

"If you're honest with me. How do you want this to end?"

"Honestly?" She nodded and he smiled. "Best case scenario? You two back together. _But_," he interrupted her before she had time to speak up, "That's not why I brought you in. I thought you two were over each other."

"No you didn't."

"Ok. I thought you were over him. I knew he wasn't over you."

Joanna swallowed. "You knew he wasn't?"

"I know him, Jo."

A knock on the door interrupted their talk and Koz let go of her. When he opened the door it was Lorca.

"Need you in the bar," he said.

Koz turned around. "You behave, no exploding in public."

He held up her right hand. "Swear to God. I'll do some serious cleaning in here instead."

"No chick shit in here."

"Yeah. Cuz I'm all about the 'chick shit'."

Lorca laughed and blew her a kiss when they left.

-o0o-

Lee was in the chapel with Clay when Gemma showed up in the door.

"I need to talk to you two. Now!"

"Ok, come on in." Clay said and Lee was surprised for a second. His Old Lady wouldn't get away with storming in to the Chapel and say that to him in front of another President. But obviously, Gemma was and exception in a lot of ways and more importantly; she wasn't his problem. "What's going on?"

"I've spent the morning with that little skinny bitch."

Clay sat down as well and sighed, "Is it going to be a problem?"

"I'm not sure," She seemed pissed about that, not being sure. "I'd say they'll either fuck each other like rabbits or end up trying to kill each other before this week is over."

Lee laughed again. Gemma was right and he could've told them that. Hap and Jo had always been like that.

"And what, should I get rid of her?"

"No. Kozik's right. She's his ex-wife and she needs to be protected. Could send her up to Tacoma and have the charter there look after her."

"Can't spare the men and I can't let her go alone," Clay looked at Lee for confirmation.

He nodded. "Yeah. Besides, damage is done and if we send her away it might get worse." He looked at Clay. "We need Hap. He's one of the best soldiers this club have. You know that and that's why you wanted him here. He's seen her, is riled up about it. Might as well keep her her and let him get over it, either by killing her or fucking her."

"They're both riled up as far as I can tell." Gemma said and clay looked at her where she standing by the windows leading out to the bar.

"What's you suggestion?"

"Keep Hap busy and I'll make sure she stays out of the way as well. I know she's smart enough to not try to mess with him here. Doubt he's smart enough though." Gemma looked through the window and when Lee did as well, he saw Hap with that blond all over him again. "Yeah, he's not smart enough," she said with a sarcastic tone and waved towards him.

"He's always like that," Clay said but Lee knew what Gemma meant.

Sure, Hap banged a lot of girls but he wouldn't do it at a time like this. During lockdowns or just general battles, he picked one on his way to the room and sent her out once he was done. He didn't hang around with them.

"What, you don't think that's because she's here? That he's a bit more hands on than he usually is?" Gemma was still looking out the window.

"I don't give a shit about her as long as she stays out of his way. So can she take that?" Clay asked while pointed out the window. "Hap rubbing up on blonds."

"Yes she can. But I'd say that's the problem."

She turned to her husband who was leaning with both his hands on his desk. "Care to explain what the fuck you mean with that?"

Once again, Lee understood what she meant and he was impressed at how well Gemma had pegged Hap and Jo. How they worked.

"He's doing that shit to get a reaction from her and when he doesn't, he'll get furious," Gemma said like she was talking to a child and Lee laughed again. She was dead on.

"Woman, I don't get what the fuck you're saying half of the time."

"That's how they fight." Lee explained with a sigh. "He's agitating her and she's ignoring him. He just needs to get it out of his system. I've seen it more than a couple of times."

"How long?" Clay asked.

"Give them a couple of days." Lee didn't really see any other option. "Can't send her away now, and he's already pissed. Once he calms down he'll handle it."

"Handle it?" Clay said. "When you say Hap is going to handle someone you're worrying me a tiny bit. Are we gonna need bleach?"

"If he was going to kill her he'd done it years ago." Lee stood up and walked over to the window next to Gemma. "They'll have a fight, Koz'll patch it up and they'll be ok."

"Sure about that?" Gemma looked skeptical.

"I'm not doubting your knowledge here, but I've watched the two of them for five years." He turned to Clay. "And no matter what, Hap leaves his shit behind when he's on a job. He doesn't bring that with him out of here and he'll do what's necessary."

"All I need to know." Clay stood up as well. "Fucking hell. When the fuck did this club turn into a marriage counsel operation?"

-o0o-

Lee left Clay and Gemma in the chapel. He really wasn't worried so he took care of some business, went into the room and called his wife before going back out to the bar and sat down in the couch to look around. Koz was tending to a redhead in the bar, Lorca played pool with some of the Redwood-fellas and Hap... he looked around, Hap was moping in a corner, cleaning his gun. Not that unusual sight but Hap moping and cleaning his gun with his ex-wife in the same building made Lee chuckle.

Since Joanna took off, no one had talked about her when he was around and he hadn't mentioned her name once. He'd been drinking and buried himself in blond pussy, any pussy that didn't resemble Jo even in a piss drunk state.

He had no idea what had happened and why she left. He knew that Kozik kept in touch with her and as far as he knew; Hap, Jo and Koz where the only three people that knew the real reason. Bowie had been pissed about it for a while but in the end, they were brothers, she was pussy and it was none of their business. She was far from the first pussy that took off after having had enough of the club and most definitely not the last.

She'd made quite the impression though.


	4. Impetus

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you so much for all the follows, favs and reviews. An extra thank you for the guest reviews. If you have any questions, let me know. I'm glad you all seem to like it! Had some people asking about the Latin names of the chapter so I'm **adding a translation to them now**. The ones for the first few chapters will be up shortly. It wasn't meant be a big secret, I just didn't think about it.  
_

_And a super special thank you to **Simone Santos** for her help and support on this story._

* * *

**4: Impetus**

_ a: (1) **:** a driving force **:** impulse (2) **:** incentive, stimulus _

_b **:** stimulation or encouragement resulting in increased activity _

-o0o-

Jo had become the solution to one of their problems. Lee hadn't been thrilled to outsource something that important but they had been grabbed by the balls and needed a quick way out. Redwood was counting on them to fix it and Koz had suggested to contact the girl who'd picked his pocket a few months earlier. He could still perfectly recall the discussion that day at church.

-o0o-

"So, to get into that safe, we need the key that he keeps in his pocket watch." Lee leaned back and scratched his head.

"According to the whore he bangs every Tuesday," Lorca confirmed and he looked tired. They all did.

"Can she take it?"

"No," Lorca put out his smoke while shaking his head. "He walks in, throws her the cash, bangs her and leaves."

They all sat in silence, rubbing their eyes and smoking like chimneys. It wasn't strange, they'd all been working their ass off for days, hardly any sleep and really stressed.

"Can't we just kill him and grab the fucking thing?" Hap mumbled and put his forehead on the arms resting on the table. "I'm not good at this subtle shit."

"I wish." Lee could see his point. "But we need to make sure we have that stuff _before _we kill him."

They'd been wrecking their brains with this for the last week and now when they had all the info it seemed even harder. But they needed those fucking files and find out what he knew and who else knew it. The man would die but they couldn't kill him without getting that info first. He'd been holding it over Redwood's head for weeks and if he died, it wouldn't take a genius to figure out the Sons had something to do with it if he had that shit in his safe. And he needed to die.

Suddenly Koz giggled. They turned to him to see what the fuck he could find amusing in this situation.

"We need a pickpocket," he said still giggling.

Hap sat up and looked at Koz with a smile growing on his lips. "Yes we do."

"It would have to be one hell of a pickpocket to get a fucking pocket watch from someone inner pocket. As far as I know none of you are very good at it and it's not like I have time to send you to the School Of Seven Bells."

"Thought that place was a myth," Bowie said.

"Not the fucking point right now," Lee answered and turned to Hap. "Picked up skills I don't know about, Hap?"

"No, but I know one who can steal the necklace of someone."

"You know her?" Koz asked. "Fuck, you tapped her, didn't you?"

"No. But I got her name."

"Who is she?" He looked between Koz and Hap. "And can we trust her?"

"She lifted Koz wallet at a bar after hustling some students in pool. We weren't wearing our cuts so I... asked her to give it back. When I said we were bikers, she freaked out, offered to give me everything and she had a lot in that bag." Hap seemed to be very amused by the memory. "Fuck, she took my wrist watch without me even noticing."

"All very impressive, Hap, but can we trust her?" This was a big deal and bringing in outsiders was something he wasn't comfortable with. Especially someone he didn't know at all.

"She wouldn't go to the cops and she owes Koz."

"What makes you think she wouldn't go to the cops?"

"She's a pickpocket. Might not be a biker but she's not on the right side of the law," Koz said. "And a really good hustler. Fuck, she really had me. Honestly, if I hadn't known it was her I wouldn't even have thought about her once I figured my wallet was missing."

"I think she'd do it for fun."

"For fun!" Lee shook his head. "I don't like the idea of bringing in an outsider."

"Wouldn't have to tell her shit," Lorca said. "All we want is the key, once we have it she's on her way again."

"Say it's a payment for her indiscretion," Donut said with a smile. "Sounds like a smart girl, she'll understand the fine print without you spelling it out."

Lee wasn't convinced. And he wasn't in the habit of taking decisions about outsiders without getting a feel for them. If they hadn't been in this shitty situation he wouldn't have even considered it but they had a very limited time frame.

"Fuck! Bring her in, I wanna get the feel of her before we ask her anything."

It didn't take them long to find her. Bowie did a search in the police files and the search 'pickpocket' and 'Joanna' was all it took. She had some minor arrested, one for pickpocketing, some scam, all of it before she turned twenty and all charges had been dropped. Judging from the police files she'd been a good citizen the last five years. Judging from what Hap and Koz said, she'd been anything but.

When Hap and Koz walked into the clubhouse with her two days later she looked worried.

He still didn't like it, at all. The Redwood and the IRA both had their eyes on them and the had about two weeks to solve this problem or they were screwed.

This guy, a wealthy half crocked business man, had gotten over some info on their gun business. He wanted a cut and no one wanted to give him one. He had taunted them that he had all the info in his safe and the key on him at all times. His goons were instructed to immediately look in his safe if he died. It was so stupid, so very 'Bond villain', that Lee had thought it was a fucking joke at first. But it wasn't. He'd given them until the end of the month or he'd turn over the info to the ATF.

The assumption had been that he probably had another key somewhere but they couldn't figure out where. Another plan had been to simply take the entire fucking safe, it wasn't like they needed to look inside it. But it was probably a good idea to make sure the shit actually was in the safe, especially with the IRA having some serious interest in those papers.

So a simple breaking and entering. Great plan, except they weren't thieves. They were muscles, if they did a breaking and entering the walked in, grabbed shit and walked out. They didn't open safes or use lasers or stethoscope or whatever the hell it was thieves used today. Basically, they weren't gentlemen thieves and they would never fit into Oceans Eleven and had no urge to do that either. The used muscles and they were faced with a problem when that wasn't enough.

Lee had slowly moved towards he idea to shoot the fucker and take the safe at the same time. Sort of like a biker heist but this idea, lifting the watch to give them the chance to have a look without him knowing. The plan depended on them trusting this... pickpocket. Joanna Boswell.

"My name is Lee and I'm the president in this charter." If she was smart enough to get scared about stealing from a cut she knew what a President in a Charter was.

"Hi" She still looked uncomfortable. "I'm Joanna."

"I know." He pointed at a table, "Have a sit."

She nodded and sat down. When he sat down in front of her she didn't start to talk, she looked at him carefully, looked around but still didn't talk. It surprised him. She was either, unlike most women, not the kind who chatted when she was nervous. Or she wasn't nervous. He leaned towards the first option.

"According to Hap and Koz you're a very skilled pickpocket."

"Yes." No modesty what so ever but she gave him a nervous smile. "I didn't know they were a part of a club."

"I know. This isn't not about you taking Koz' wallet. At least not the way you think it is."

She eyed him "Ok?"

"We do however feel that you owe us and we need your help."

She looked confused and divided her attention between Hap and Koz by the bar before turning it back to him. "I'm not much of a pole dancer and... well, basically I'd prefer to keep my clothes on."

He laughed. "We have girls for that. It's your other skill we're after."

With a glare in Hap's direction she mumbled, "My quick fingers I take it."

"Yeah."

"I'll explain the situation but I want to make sure that you do understand that this is between you and us."

"I'm not a fan of the police." She smiled and now she looked relaxed. "And threatening me makes me nervous. When I'm nervous I'm sloppy."

He laughed and pointed at the chapel. "Follow me and I'll explain what you need to know."

"I'd prefer to be on a need to know basis," she said as they walked.

She was obviously a very smart girl. Donut sat down with them. The small nod from him told Lee that he agreed on the silent decision to get her help.

"A man has a pocket watch and we need it."

"You want me to take a pocket watch?" She looked at them and when the both nodded she smiled. "Is that like the test to see if I can handle the real deal?" They both shook their head and he could see the wheels turning in her head. "Ok, I don't need to know why you need it or what this is really about but to be able to do this as smoothly as possible, for all of us, I need more than what it is I'm supposed to take."

"There's a key in the pocket watch."

"Do you need the key to open whatever it's for?"

"Why else would we need a fucking key?"

She shrugged. "Could just be that you didn't want him to have it. If I don't need to take it from him it makes it easier for me."

Lee wasn't sure what the fuck she was getting at and she seems to be thinking hard. How fucking hard was it to understand? They needed the key.

"How's that?" he finally said.

"Would it be ok with a copy of it? I'm guessing you're gonna have a look in whatever it goes to. If I do a copy the owner wouldn't know it's missing and unless he misses it for a couple of minutes I'm making the copy, I'm off the hook as well." Another one of those shrugs. "Trying to cover my own ass as well."

He looked at Donut who had a big smile on his lips.

"You're gonna do a copy?" She nodded. "You can do that?"

"No. But I'll have it done in no time. They guy doing it won't know anything else than that it's me giving him a key and asking for a copy."

"How fast?"

"Fast," she answered. "Who's the mark?"

"George Riley."

"The business man?"

Lee nodded the confirmation and she went silent. For a long time.

"Is that a problem?"

"No," she waved absently with her hand when she answered. "I'm just trying to figure out the smartest way to get to him. I've read that he's quite often at the theater or the opera. Showing himself off among cultural elite of the city."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"If I lift the key before it starts, get my guy to do a copy you'll have a couple of hours to do whatever you want with it while he's occupied."

Lee smiled. He liked this girl, she seemed to sense they were short on time and gave them the opportunity of getting the key and time to have a look when they knew where he was. Hopefully the fuck had planned to go to the opera sometime soon.

"How much?"

"You pay for my dress and anything else I need to fit into the audience and get his attention, and the ticked of course. I get to keep whatever else I can lift after I've returned the key to him."

"We'll pay you, don't lift anything else." He stared at her. "You don't have any other questions?"

"I don't want to know. I prefer to live in ignorance of what you're going to do and I'm going to buy some long silk gloves to make sure I don't leave any prints anywhere on that watch or anything else in that place."

"Can you do it with gloves?" Donut asked and she rolled her eyes in response. Lee stood up and they started to walk outside. She followed them.

"I'll help you and you won't have to pay me but I might need your help someday."

Hap and Koz came walking along with Bowie when the exited the Chapel. Lee laughed at her set up as them owing her a favor in return.

"Is this the Godfather?" he said and the other fell into his laugh. All of them, except Joanna.

She looked utterly confused. "What?"

"The movie."

"Oh!" she smiled. "Haven't seen it."

"You haven't seen The Godfather?" Koz didn't seem to believe his ears.

"Don't watch movies that often," she shrugged. "Anyway. I get into trouble sometimes. Usually nothing big but... some people get, let's say agitated, when I win their money and even if I'm good at picking my targets. I miss sometimes. As you know." She said the last part while looking at Koz.

"If you miss, you let us know."

"Thank you." She turned to Hap. "So, no stripping this time either?"

"Could if you wanted me to," Hap gave her a smirk and Lee looked a second time to make sure he'd caught that correct. He was sure, Hap had a boner for this chick but he hadn't tapped her yet. Unusual for Hap, he tended to fuck and forget chicks pretty damn fast. He assumed he just hadn't had the opportunity yet.

"Tempting, but I have a gown to buy." She turned to Lee. "Make sure I get tickets to whatever show he's going to. Let me know if you have troubles with that, I might be able to help out." She handed him a paper. "That's my number."

Four days later they were in an ally outside the opera. She came running, holding up the red gown and handed over a key.

"Damn! Didn't think you had any tits, girl." Koz said with his eye fixated on her cleavage.

"I don't, It's those cushions you glue to them and a very good bra. To get a proper cleavage. With one of those you know where a male mark keeps his eyes." She lifted up her long dress again. "Especially in a 'fuck me'-dress like this one. Do you need me to keep him occupied after the show?"

"How would you do that?" Lee purposely looked at Hap when he said the next thing. "You don't need to fuck him to help out. Despite the dress." Hap flinched and Lee smiled inwardly. The killer definitely had a boner for this chick.

"He wants to meet for a drink in the bar after the performance," she shrugged. "I can keep him occupied for a while without spreading my legs. I'm a thief, not a whore."

"Didn't think you were," he laughed. "Do it. The drink, not the fuck." She nodded and took off. Hap really looked pissed but didn't say anything.

They all stared for a few seconds before Lee laughed again. She'd really done a good job and he was gonna make damn sure she got properly paid for this.

"She's good," Lorca said and they got up on their bikes.

Koz and Bowie stayed behind and made sure she got home safe. A week later he had Hap pick her up again. He did that on purpose, it was worth it to see the jaw on the big guy tense up when he tried to hide his smile. Major boner, Lee thought to himself.

When she walked into the Chapel she gave him a smile. "Hey. Hope everything went well."

"It did." He pointed at a chair and she sat down. "Have you read the papers lately?"

"Yes."

"Still no questions?"

George Riley had died in a car bomb the day before. According to the paper that was. In truth, he'd died when Hap broke his neck after an hour of torture, they were pretty sure the bomb would hide that though. They put him right on top of it to make sure he was spread over most of the parking lot.

"I think I get the gist of it. But it's none of my business."

"Good." He looked at her. She looked like a completely different person in this outfit that the gown. She'd been quite pretty in it and she'd been right about the cleavage, it had been quite the eye catcher. "Thanks, for your help."

"It's ok. Kind of owed you and you paid me well. And it was fun."

"Fun?"

"Yeah, never been to the opera before and it's been a long time since I got to hustle someone in a gown."

He laughed and shook his head. "But you have done it?"

"Sure. And for the record; I kept out of other people's pockets."

"I know." Lee stood up and she followed his lead. When he extended his hand she took it with a smile. "I have to say, it's been an honor. Don't see many of your kind anymore."

"Old fashioned thieves and hustlers?"

"Exactly." He let go of her hand and followed her outside. "And should you need help you know where to find us."

"Probably won't but thank you." She gave him another big, slightly crooked smile. "I had a lot of fun. Don't think that the right thing to say, all things considering, but I did."

"You're very calm about it. The guy dying."

"He would be dead even if I hadn't butted in."

Anyone else, especially a girl, he would've said it was just a way to defend what they'd just done but she meant it. She seemed to be able to completely detach herself from it.

"What did they key guy say?"

"Nothing. He never does. That's why he's still in business."

Hap came up to them and when she looked at him; in a second it was like she shifted towards him. It wasn't that she physically moved it was just a shift in her attention. It was fascinating.

"It was interesting to meet you, Joanna," he said.

"Thank you and the same."

She waved to the other guys and when she started to walk Hap followed her. Lee couldn't help himself, he went after them and watched them talk for a few minutes next to her car. He had a feeling he hadn't seen her for the last time.

And he was right. About six months later she was back at the clubhouse with Hap and she stuck around. Lee liked her, she knew her place, didn't butt in and she never ever mentioned her adventure at the opera again. It was like it had never happened.

-o0o-

Happy focused on the gun in his hands that he was cleaning. He needed to keep his mind off things, off Jo. That was easier said than done though. She'd always done this to him, messed him up. He couldn't fucking help himself around her and all he wanted was some kind of reaction. Something that proved that she wasn't as detached as she made it look. He knew she wasn't but at the same time he needed to _see_ it.

Since that very first time, Jo had been able to get under his skin. And it never stopped. He hadn't even seen or talked to the bitch for five years and the second she stepped into the clubhouse he wanted her. It had taken him some time to admit it to himself but he did. He knew how to get to her too since he knew her as well as she knew him. He had just needed some time to make sure that he knew what the fuck he was doing.

Once the gun was clean and ready he stood up and walked over to Clay.

"Got more guns that need cleaning?"

Clay looked at him, shrugged and showed him their stash. Happy grabbed a bunch of them, took them out to a table and started to dissemble them. His mind still on Jo.

When Koz sat down in the table with him and took one of the guns to help him, he ignored him.

"Bro, you know I did it to protect her." Happy didn't answer Koz and put the now clean gun to the side, reaching for the next one. "You know she can make anyone believe anything, she's... she's pissed at you. She's just pretending to not care." Koz was quite for a while. "But you know that, don't you?"

Happy still didn't answer, or even looked at Kozik. Even if he didn't look at her either, he noticed Jo walking into the bar. She was carrying cleaning supplies and went into the room behind the bar. Once she was gone he looked up, towards the door and when she came back outside, she was still ignoring him.

He hated being ignored and it had always been her way of getting to him off. She didn't scream, accuse or went for his throat in public. Ever. She just made sure he wasn't even a part of her universe. And even if he tried to tell himself that it was just another one of her fucking acts, it didn't matter. He needed her to_ see _him.

As Jo walked back towards the dorms, still ignoring him, he made up his mind. They had always fought a lot and he knew that the only way to get them out of this circle was to rock the boat. Rattle her, leave her alone and then go back and talk to her. If he just got to the point where she listened to him he'd get through to her, he knew that. She might get under his skin but he knew that it went both ways.

When he got up, Kozik grabbed his arm.

"Leave the gun," he said.

Happy had almost forgotten and nodded a thanks to Koz. Jo was ok with a lot of things but she hated guns, wouldn't use them and given what she did and how she was, she didn't need them. He took the gun and left it on the table before going after her.

Knocking on the door he tried to... not look angry. Jo opened the door and when she saw it was him she tensed up.

"Hap..." she shook her head. "I don't want to do this and I promised to stay clear of you."

"Promised who?"

"You were in the room when I promised Clay. And then it was Gemma." She was still holding the door, blocking his way into the room.

This was the real Jo in front of him. The one she was when she wasn't pretending or playing games. She looked at him with begging eyes but still looked relaxed. This was who he missed, even if he hardly admitted it to himself when he was alone, he missed her like hell. And the last couple of days had made it even more obvious. And this relaxed Jo made him think that maybe they could skip the 'rocking the boat' step this time.

"Look, can we talk? Let me in and we'll talk." He held up his hands. "Nothing else."

She shook her head. "I can't imagine what we would possibly have to say to each other. Unless you want to come in to sign those papers." She pointed with her hand over her shoulder. "I brought them with me."

He could've taken a lot of that but her final smirk, with her indifferent mask up again, set him off.

He was gonna sink the god damn ship.

He pushed the door open, shoved her inside and slammed the door shut behind him. Now she was scared but he was too pissed to care. He grabbed her and pushed her against the wall.

"I'm not signing those fucking papers." She looked terrified and somewhere deep inside he felt sorry but he was to angry to care. "Think you can just bail out and send me some fucking papers to finish it off?"

"Hap, please," she squirmed in his hands. "Please."

"No! No fucking 'please' or 'Hap'. You disappear for five fucking years. I went to the club and when I got back you were gone. You didn't even bother to leave a fucking note. Nothing!"

"You knew why and you still do."

"Doesn't fucking matter. You're not with someone for years, get their ink, marry them and then take the fuck off without a single fucking word of explanation," he growled and was right in her face. "That's not how you fucking end things."

She pushed him back and glared at him. Now she was pissed and that was good. A lot better than scared. "_I_ didn't end things, _you_ did."

"I didn't end shit and for the record; I'm never signing those fucking papers."

"Didn't think so," she said and went for the door. She opened it again. "I think we're done."

He walked towards the door but stopped right in front of her. Close. When he reached for her she flinched but he still didn't stop, instead he carefully stroke her cheek. Jo closed her eyes and he leaned forwards, stroke his lips over her cheek and smiled when he heard her draw a deep, shaky breath.

Touching her ear with his lips he whispered, "Baby, we'll never be _done_. You know that."

He left her with that. Satisfied with what he'd seen. No indifference and all those emotions in her face, not all of them bad ones from his point of view. He'd rocked the boat and now she needed to calm down before he offered her the deal.


	5. Ab Ovo

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_I need to once again thank **Simone Santos **for being such and amazing support. And make sure that you check out her stories as well!_

_And thank you all for reading and reviewing this story. There's been a lot of speculations to what Happy did to Jo to make her leave, which is great, I like to keep you curious. I can tell you that the argument that led her to leave was the first thing I came up with in this story so it's set and not something I'm gonna have to come up with. Simone also helped me out to tweak it in great way. As always, let me know if you have any questions._

* * *

**5: Ab Ovo **

_a. at first  
b. from the start  
c. before everything _

-o0o-

When Hap left, Joanna was hyperventilating and she sat down on the bed heavily. She leaned her head in her hands and tried to take deep breaths. She didn't want to cry but she had a hard time avoiding it at the moment. She wasn't sure why though. Hap had the freaky ability to make her cry and she never fully knew why, he just stirred up emotions she couldn't handle. He always knew how to play her, mess with her feelings, he'd always known and there weren't that many people who had ever been able to do that.

Even if she stopped scamming early on and even gave up picking pockets a while after getting together with Hap, she kept up with all those acts by hustling. But she had never been able to bullshit him, not even that first night when he watched her play pool. He'd been on to her from the very first second he saw her.

The only way she had to get to him was to ignore him. It wasn't fooling him but it pissed him off. It was also the only way of doing it at the club. Having a hysterical woman running around, yelling at him... Hap would've dropped her like a hot potato if that had never been her style.

While sitting there it all came back to her again, his hand on her cheek, the lips running from her cheek to her ear and that damn voice. Since their first night he'd known that his voice made her knees weak and he used it. Often.

She wasn't stupid, she knew exactly what he was doing. He rattled her, pissed her off before turning her on and then left her to let her stew. And it was working, her entire inside was twisted into a tight knot. Keeping emotions in check was always important, either you were hustling, pickpocketing or growing up the way she did. Doing it was as natural as breathing to her but with Hap she couldn't. Everything she felt was right in her face for him to see and it drove her insane.

After the adventure at the opera he'd come to pick her up at her house. That time he was alone as oppose to the time before and she couldn't help giving him a big smile. When she'd talked to him by her car on her way home he'd pointed out that he'd let her get away with out stripping her naked once again. He'd also pointed out that it wouldn't happen again. She hadn't thought she would see him again but it didn't take more than a month. He admitted years later that it wasn't a coincident, he had been looking for her.

-o0o-

Joanna was drunk. Extremely drunk in a way she very rarely allowed her self to become. But this was her birthday. Her twenty-fifth. Considering her track record of shitty birthdays getting extremely drunk seemed like a good idea. She wasn't fond of birthdays and hoped that drinking herself into oblivion would mean she got over and through this one fast.

Someone sat down next to her and when she looked up she laughed. Her chances of having a good birthday just became a lot bigger.

"Mr. SOA. Are you stalking me?"

He looked at her and then shook his head. "You really are drunk. I though it was an act."

"Nope, this day in history is my twenty-fifth birthday. And I'm drinking to forget it."

"Twenty-fifth?" he said with a frown.

"Twenty-fifth," she confirmed. "I am today, officially, a quarter of a century old and I got shit to show for those years." She picked up the glass of scotch in front of her holding it in a toast towards him. "Pretty damn depressing when you think about it. Might just be that I don't like birthdays."

"Why?"

"Most of my birthdays have been bad or disappointing as hell. Some have even been both." She waved to the bartender to have him fill the glass. "How old are you?"

"Thirty-two." He looked at her down another drink and wave for yet another one. When the glass was full, he took the glass from her hand, emptied it and took her arm. "Come on."

"Are you going to strip me naked now?" she asked as she stumbled after him. "You said I wouldn't get away without a strip search the next time you saw me."

"Depends," he said while he led her to the door. "Would you let me fuck you once I got you naked?"

"You know, that could make this a good birthday so I'd say yes, you can fuck me."

He took her out to his bike. She'd been behind guys on bikes before but generally when she was a lot more sober than she was at the moment. He started it and then turned to look at her.

"What are you waiting for?"

"I'm really drunk."

"Get on." When she was still hesitating he leaned forward, took her arm and pulled her closer. "You place isn't far and I'm not gonna let you fall off."

She laughed and got up behind him. There was a lot of unusual things today, her being drunk was one, her bring a guy home was another. She was usually the one going to their place but she had a feeling that this guy brought fucks to his place even more rarely than she did.

As he got off his bike she stood by the door and waited. He looked at the house as he walked up to her.

"Are the others home?" He knew she didn't live alone. When they, Koz and him, picket her up two of the others had been at home. They'd half scared them to death when they asked for her.

"Don't know." She unlocked the door and once it opened she felt his hands on her hips. "You know, I'm really drunk, and gentlemen don't take advantage of drunk girls."

"I'm not a gentleman," he said and pressed his rock hard dick into her back. "And you won't be drunk when we're done."

She turned around and put her arms on his shoulders. "Really, that rough or that long?"

"Both." He lifted her up and kissed her. The only thing going through Joanna's head after that was how good his lips felt. With her mouth open, her next thought was that his tongue was great. Then he stopped and that was pretty fucking annoying. He said something and blinking she tried to snap back.

"What?"

"Got you deaf just by kissing you," he laughed. "Where's your room?"

"Up the stairs, to the left."

He carried her upstairs, opened the door. He walked inside and put her down before looking around. "Nice. Clean."

"I like clean," she mumbled and started to unbuckle his belt while looking up at him in hopes that he'd kiss her again. There was no way in hell she'd be able to reach him if he didn't lean down towards her. Luckily he did and she once again she basically blacked out.

She felt him take her wrists and move them towards his pants, "Don't stop, babe."

He guided her towards the bed and when her knees hit the edge he gave her a light push and she fell into it. In a second he was on top of her, pulling of her t-shit.

"Is this a challenge?" he asked and she looked at him in confusion. "The t-shirt."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I hope it is." He pulled it up and held it in front of her. "I like a good challenge."

She managed to focus and saw that she had her 'No Pasaran!' t-shirt. "If it helps I'll write it on my pants as well."

"No need," he mumbled while reaching for them.

He got her out of one piece of clothing after another and then she was lying naked on her back. He didn't touch her and she opened her eyes. He was sitting up with a big smile, looking at her.

"Don't want to be a nag here but I'm really fucking drunk and if you stop like that I might fall asleep."

His eyes met her and with a smile he stroke the inside of her thigh while moving up to rest the other hand next to her head.

"I'll keep you awake." When his finger entered her she closed her eyes again and moaned. "So much for 'no pasaran'," he mumbled into her ear.

"Gonna have to add at least one," she panted. "No pasaran is plural."

"Since it's your birthday," he answered and she felt a second one and when he kissed her she groaned into his mouth.

He didn't stop, he kept kissing her and when he pressed his thumb against her clit she threw her arms around his neck and moved into his hand. With a cry she had her first orgasm. When she opened her eyes he was smiling.

"Why aren't you naked?" she asked and his smile got even wider.

"I took off your clothes, you take off mine." He rolled over to his back next to her and gave her a challenging smile. "If you're sober enough."

Turned out that she was and since she wanted to up the stakes she used her mouth and not her hands to give him his first orgasm. She was sure he'd understand what she was doing. When she sat up and wiped her mouth he sat up as well and gave her a kiss. Without saying anything he got up and went into her bathroom, bringing a glass from her bedside table. She could her him rinsing it and when he came back he was holding two glasses of water. The other was the one she used for her toothbrush.

"Thirsty?"

"Yes."

He put them on the dresser, pulled her out of her bed and led her towards it. He was standing behind her and placed her hands flat against the surface. She wondered what the fuck he was doing when he carefully tried to balance the glasses on her hands.

"Press down the palms to get the hand gets flat."

When she did, still wondering what the fuck this was about, they stood steady on her hands.

He kissed her cheek, licked to her ear and then he grabbed her hips with both hands.

"I'm gonna lick every fucking part of your body, some of them more carefully than others," he moved one hand up and pinched her nipple, "and if you managed to not spill, you get to drink the water when I'm done."

"And if I spill?"

"I'll fill them again and we start over."

She wrinkled her eyebrows and turned her head to look at him. "How's that a bad deal for me?"

"I won't fuck you until you make it."

The smile he gave her made her knees weak and she realized he had been right. She would be stone cold sober by the time he was done with her.

Afterwards she laid on her back with a throbbing ache between her legs and a big fucking smile on her lips. She turned over to her side and reached underneath the mattress to get one of the joints she had there. When she lit it, Hap opened his eyes.

"You a magician as well?"

"Nope," she said and handed it to him. "Just nimble fingers."

He took it, inhaled deep and then leaned over her to put it out in the ashtray next to her bed.

"Hey! I wasn't done with that!"

He grabbed her hips, pulled her down with her legs on either side of him and leaned over her. With his nose agains hers he almost growled, "I'll get you for nimble fingers."

Then they entered the second round, or fourth, depending how you counted.

She woke up when he left the bed, it was still the middle of the night and she wasn't surprised even if she did feel a slight tug in her heart that he was trying to sneak away. But he surprised her even more when he, after getting dressed, leaned over the bed and kissed her forehead.

"Happy birthday, Jo."

"Thank you for my present," she mumbled as he walked to the door. He halted and felt his pockets.

"What did you take?"

"So little trust," she laughed, "I meant the sex, thank you for fucking me. And for making this the most pleasurable birthday yet."

He turned around again, walked over and gave her a very proper kiss. "You're welcome." He looked at her, dragged his thumb over her mouth. "I like your mouth."

Joanna didn't, "It's crooked, looks funny."

"I like it and I like that you know how to use it," he said and gave her another kiss. "See you around, and keep those nimble fingers out of my pocked when I do."

"I'll do my best."

She had honestly thought that was it. That him leaving meant he was done with her. He'd had an itch and fucking her scratched it. She'd been wrong though. Two days later when she came home he was sitting on his bike outside her house.

She halted when she saw him. "You're early."

"Early?" He threw away his smoke and walked up to her.

"Yeah, early. I'm still sore. Should've given me another day or so."

With a feral smile he put his arm around her and walked her towards the house. "Could always play with water. You'll be healed by the time you make it."

-o0o-

Kozik watched Hap when he came from the dorms. He was smiling and sat down to keep cleaning the guns. He did his best to wait the man out but he just kept on cleaning the guns, looking very pleased with himself.

"What?" Kozik finally asked. "What's with the smile?"

"None of your business."

"So if I go to my room, I won't find her crying in a pile on the floor?"

"She's fine, not a scratch on her."

"Bruises?"

"No."

Kozik didn't miss the slight hesitation from him and knew that Hap wasn't completely sure if he'd bruised her or not. He'd probably grabbed her. It still made him angry. He wished Hap was capable of use words instead of his fist, at least when Jo was involved.

One look at Hap told him he wouldn't get anymore out of him so he went to his room to check on Jo instead.

She was sitting on the side of the bed and at first glance he didn't see any bruises and she didn't seem to be crying either. She looked... perplex in a weird way. Like she didn't know what was back or forth.

"Hey, Peanut." He sat down next to her and that seemed to help her snap out of it a little bit.

"This was an all around bad idea."

"Coming here?"

"Yes. Me, coming here, where he is." She took his hand. "Tell me that this really was about protecting me a fucked up ways to get us back together."

"If I was trying for that I would've done it years ago." He gave her hand a kiss. "I promise you, Jo, that wasn't what I was doing." She smiled at him. "But since you're here and..."

She hit him in the arm and laughed. Then there was a deep sigh. "He said we weren't done. That we'd never be done."

Fucking Hap and messing her up, all the time. It had always been like this in one form or another. He'd find her in a heap on the floor more than once after Hap stormed out. It usually ended with Hap storming back in, sweeping her away while kissing her and experienced had taught Koz that he had very little time to get out if he didn't want to hear their very vigorous making up.

"Peanut, I'm sorry. Really sorry but this wasn't some scheme from my side. It's a real threat and I hoped that he'd mention you to the others. When he didn't I picked you up." He gave her hand a kiss. "What's messing you up this time?"

With a tired smile she shook he head. "Why won't he just let me go?"

"You know why."

"He's a possessive fuck and I'm his property."

"Jo, that's not it."

"Sure it is, he tattooed it on me."

Jo could look so small, so fragile sometimes. Especially when Hap did this to her and she did now. Kozik knew that this was about her trying to convince herself that letting Hap back in was a bad idea and he was wondering the same. At the same time; he'd never lied to Jo about Hap, he'd told her the truth and he wasn't about to change that now. Because despite all this, the messing with each others head, their fights and Hap fucking up, they were good together and for each other. When they were on the same page, which used to me more often than not, he envied them like hell for what they had.

"That's not it, Joanna. You know it isn't. He still loves you."

"No, _Herman_," she said, making a point of him using her full name. "This is not how you treat someone you love."

"Then why are you doing it?" Jo was very good at pointing out what Hap did or didn't do. She wasn't as clear sighted about herself though. And he was trying to point out that she was being somewhat of an ass herself. She'd ignored Hap with and mainly to piss him off.

That went over as well as it used to do and she stood up. "I'm hitting the shower."

She stomped into the bathroom. Kozik swore to himself. He was so fucking fed up with cleaning up their shit. This was never meant to be a way to get them back together, at all. He'd known it would be trouble but not like this. Hap was obviously not going to back off, he wanted her back.

That wasn't a big surprise though, despite never mentioning her the fact that he wouldn't sign the papers had been a clear enough sign. It had taken Hap a day to figure it out but now he'd made up his mind and a Hap with a made up mind was hard to avoid. Jo knew that better than anyone.

And if Jo really hadn't been interested she'd been able to take Hap out of those thoughts with a look. He'd seen her do it, not for something like this but when she'd made it clear that she was not ready to make up yet. He wished they's just get over this hurdle and start fucking talk to each other. That usually meant he didn't have to be right smack in the middle of it.

He left the room and went back outside.

"Satisfied?" He heard behind him and turned around to see Hap leaning against the wall outside his room.

"What is it you want me to do, Hap?" He walked up to him. "Cause I don't get it anymore. You didn't even ask me about her."

"Would you have told me?"

"I don't know." If he was honest, probably not. But he would've told Jo that he'd asked at least. Let her decide. "I'm so fucking tired of the two of you. Make up your fucking mind."

He turned around and left Hap, he couldn't fucking deal with them. None of them. He needed a blow job.

"I didn't treat her like shit."

"Not all the time," Kozik sighed but didn't turn around. "She needs a moment so leave her alone."


	6. Indutiae

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you so much for your support and please keep those reviews coming, I love to hear what you think of the story! And make sure you ask me if there's anything that's unclear._

_And I'm gonna keep thanking **Simone Santos** in every chapter for being great. A special thank you goes out to **AngieInWonderland** this time as well for her help._

* * *

**6: Indutiae**

_a: truce, armistice  
b: suspension of hostilities  
_

-o0o-

Once Joanna got out of the shower she felt better, she always did after a shower and walking out into the now clean room, she was even pretty pleased with herself. She found the reading pad in the bag and laid down on the bed. Going out to the bar meant facing Hap so a night reading in bed seemed a lot nicer.

About two hours later there was a knock on the door, hoping it wasn't Hap she opened and saw Tig, leaning against the doorframe with a big smile.

"Babe, you said you'd give me another shot at getting into that chastity belt."

She realized that the news on her being Hap's hadn't hit the rest of the club yet and she didn't want to be the one who told them. During the time she'd been with Hap they'd never gone down to Redwood or hardly any of the other Charters. He'd gone to clubs but that was usually for a hit, that's what he did even back then, or to help out much like he was doing now. He'd explained to her that he preferred if people didn't know about her, that he had someone that close. It was for her safety and she didn't object. Obviously someone doing a search would find her immediately but there was never a reason for one of the other clubs to do that.

Hap had called her his dirty little secret and she liked it. He'd slip into her bed when he came back from club buiness, pull her towards him and ask her how his dirty little secret was feeling and if she was horny.

She looked at Tig. "Will trying to get into my pants include you pouring me drinks?"

"Won't be pouring them for ya, doll, but I'll keep 'em coming."

"Fine, I'll stick to beer and don't hold your breath. About sleeping with me, I mean." She took a hoodie and pulled it over her head. "I don't sleep with guys so they can get back on someone else. You just want to piss Koz off."

"Not only. I'm also a huge fan of pussy."

"Koz isn't the only one you'd piss off. Just giving you a heads up on that."

"Good to know," Tig said as she walked outside and put his arm around her shoulders. "We'll have some fun while I try to figure out who the other guy is."

He brought her out to the bar and handed her a beer.

"I won't be drinking at the same speed as I did last time," she said by the time he handed her the next one.

"The speed I _thought_ you were drinking."

"Yeah," she said, the tone in his voice made her worried. "Listen, I hope we're ok."

He eyed her, "On one condition. We play."

"For what?"

"Nothing. I wanna see you play for real. How good you really are."

"I won't sleep in you room so no bets, we just play."

"Ok," he gave her a smile and moved her towards the pool table. "If you change your mind let me know. I'm always up for some fun."

They started playing and soon there were some people, Koz and Hap among them, watching. It was fun. It had been quite some time since she just played without any bets or hustles going on. When the other Tacoma-guys came as well Tig started to ask questions.

"What is the perfect hustle?"

"The perfect hustle?" she said with a smile. "When they don't know they've been hustled. When they think it was just luck that I won and feel it could've just as easily tipped over in their favor."

"Was that what you tried yesterday?"

"No. You went from a pretty bad player to a really good one. It would've been obvious if I won that I had done the same. Besides," she pointed towards the Tacoma-men, "they would've told you what I did anyway."

"But isn't the point that you're supposed to loose the first rounds and then beat me in the last?"

"Sometimes it's easier to do it the other way around. Especially when you're a woman." She leaned over the pool table and took the next shoot. "To play bad and have them 'let' you win and then win when the real money is on the table as well. Like a reversed hustle." She stood up and smiled at them. "If they're just average players you can do that without them knowing you hustled them. At least if you play ok the first few times and just slightly better when you win. That's when you can make them believe it was just unluck that they didn't win. Or that you're unbelievably lucky."

"Like when you 'missed' and made it impossible for me to take a shot?"

"Exactly." She watched him take his shot and from the corner of her eyes she noticed Hap watching her. She wondered why Tig asked about hustling. She was pretty sure he knew quite a lot about it. At least the basics, judging from his behavior the day before. "Are you trying to make me believe you don't know hot to hustle?"

"Know the basics. I've seen 'Color of Money' at least."

"Don't bother with movie references, she doesn't know shit about films," Lee said and gave Jo the finger when she glared at him. "It's true."

"I've seen 'Color of Money'!"

Tig ignored Lee's comment, "How old were you when you started?"

"Young." Jo turned around and picked up her beer, avoiding further questions about her past and her eyes fell on Hap again. He looked at her and gave her an encouraging smile. That made her heart beat faster and she was grateful and at the same time she wanted to go over there and bitch slap him because he knew what that did to her. Tig watched her when she looked at him again. "It's a long story and..."

She wasn't sure how to continue but Tig nodded, he probably got that she didn't want to talk about it.

"Fair enough." He smiled and pointed at the table to indicate that it was her turn. "Then why do they call you 'Peanut'?"

That made all the Tacoma-boys, including Hap, laugh out loud and to her horror she felt herself blush.

"That's a long story as well."

"Don't try, Peanut," Lorca said and then he looked at Tig. "It's not a long story at all."

"Ok. I'm trying to avoid that story too," she admitted and missed the shot.

"Oh! Look at that!" Tig laughed at her miss. "Think we're gonna keep talking about this for a while."

He walked, leaned over the pool table and with a nod to Lorca he said, "Tell me." Luckily the story was distracting him as well and he missed.

"I think it was the first time she was at the clubhouse," Lorca started.

"It wasn't!" Joanna protested. "Not at all. I had been there quite a few times. It was..." she was so close to say 'Hap's' but bit down, "...someone's birthday."

"Yeah!" Bowie said and continued the story instead of Lorca. He loved it. "And Jo was eating peanuts like they were gonna be banned the next day. Couldn't get her from the bowl."

Joanna pointed at a corner pocket, "Eight ball in that one."

"No need to rush, Doll," Tig said with a smile. "We're playing another game. I wanna hear this."

She pocketed the ball and continued to set the table again, avoiding to listen to the rest of the conversation. Even if they were having fun at her expensed she had missed this. Listening to them, hanging out with them. Even them teasing her, which they did, a lot!

"So finally I asked her why she was so fucking obsessed with peanuts," Bowie was still laughing, trying to tell the story. "And she held one up towards the light like this," He held up his hand with an avid expression and Joanna protested.

"I did _not_ hold it up like that!"

"Yeah! You did," Koz nodded.

"And she said she liked peanuts because they were just like her, small, hard and salty."

Tig looked with the most pleased expression she'd seen on him so far. He was so thrilled to have found out. She sighed, "I was _very_ drunk. _Really _drunk."

"Yeah, I'm gonna call you Peanut form now on," he laughed. "Small, hard and salty. Sounds like a dick, though."

"Are you calling me a penis now?"

"Did no such thing, _Peanut._"

They finished the game and he kept calling her Peanut but it honestly wasn't something she was bothered by anymore. Even if the story behind was funny it was a term of endearment these days. Tig knew it. He took her back to the bar and they were standing next to each other. Just talking.

Even if she was pretty sure he'd fuck her in a second if she offered, he didn't really try. She doubted it was her charming personality that made him keep her around. He was curious about who the other guy he could piss off was because he kept an eye on the people around them the entire time.

"Are you chasing pussy while talking to me?" she teased him.

"What?"

"Not that I mind. It's happened to me quite a few times at the Tacoma clubhouse."

"So you've spent a lot of time there?" He smiled. "And you seem to know them well." She still didn't answer. "Hmm," he looked around. "I'm trying to figure out who the other guy is."

"So this has nothing to do with getting some tonight?"

"Already have a girl tied up in my bed."

Joanna stared at him. "You know, anyone else I would've laughed but I've heard enough about you to know it could be true."

He leaned towards her, "Unless you check out my bed, you'll never know."

And he did spend quite a lot of the time with looking over her shoulders and around the room. Suddenly a song came on that she recognized. She'd never listened much to music, just like she hardly ever watched a movie and had never owned a TV. The circumstances of her life had simply meant that there wasn't time. But a man she lived with, he had been the closest thing she had to a father, he owned a guitar and played for her sometimes and the song that came on was one of his favorites. 'Hurricane' by Bob Dylan and it always brought back great memories to her.

"What?" Tig asked when she smiled and closed her eyes.

"It's Hurricane, I love this song."

"Bob Dylan-fan?"

"Not really, used to live with a guy who was though. He often played it for me."

They both stood still and listened, or rather tried to since it was a crowded clubhouse. But towards the end they were singing along and actually got a huge part of the bar to sing along in the lines 'To see him obviously framed, Couldn't help but make me feel ashamed to live in a land, Where justice is a game'.

Joanna laughed when the song was over and Tig gave her hug and then saw something over her shoulder and his eyes widened. "Hap!"

"What about him?"

"It's Hap." He eyed her curiously.

"What makes you think that?" She turned to the bar counter, away form Hap, and drank her beer.

"He looks like he's about to kill me."

"Or me."

"Nope, just me, Peanut. No doubt about it." He leaned closer. "I bet if I stand like this..." He moved close enough to touch her and leaned forward. "He'll come running like a bat outta hell." When she turned her head her nose basically touched his. Admittedly, they both had pretty impressively sized snoot. He smiled and then she felt a hand on her other shoulder.

Joanna turned around and Hap's black eyes were staring into hers.

"Go to bed," he said and the tone of his voice made her instinctively do as he asked. There were times when you shouldn't argue with him, simply do what he said. He didn't use that voice often so she knew he meant business when he did.

She nodded and mumbled a goodnight to Tig who looked extremely amused. Back into the room she brushed her teeth, picked up her reading pad and settled down to read. It took her a while before she realized herself why she didn't turn off the light. She was waiting for the knocks. And when she realized that, she turned of the lights and forced herself to go to sleep.

-o0o-

Tig was thrilled. He watched Joanna leave with a big smile on his lips. He even let his eyes drop to take an extra look at that sassy little ass as it left the bar. Then he turned to Hap and met a stare that should make him shiver, probably would've if he hadn't known him better.

"Wanna fill min in, Killah?"

"None of your business." He tried to walk away and Tig took his arm with a laugh.

"Hap, you know me, unless you specify I'm gonna assume she's available _pussy._" He emphasized the last word on purpose and it worked. Hap clenched his jaws and there was a visible twitch to his neck.

"She not available."

"She's yours." It wasn't a question but a statement. Tig was having fun but he knew he was pushing the Killah's buttons and that it was time to back off, a little at least. "Marked?"

"Yes," Hap grabbed his arm and took him with him to the hallway. "Marked and she's my _wife _so; Back. The. Fuck. Off."

"Your wife?!" He knew his jaw was planted on the ground. "When the fuck did you get married?"

"Eight years ago."

Tig had considerable differences to even breathe and couldn't get it to add up no matter how he tried. "Why is your wife sleeping in Kozik's room?"

"We're having some problems."

"Some problems?" If she was picked up by Koz and slept in his room and Hap was rubbing up on blonds every chance he got, 'some problems' was an understatement.

"Leave it at that, Tiggy." Hap's eyes had never been this black and Tig held up his hands.

"Ok. I'll leave it at that."

Hap finally let go of him and walked away. Lighting a smoke he thought about it. If Hap's wife was sleeping in Koz's room and Hap still wanted other's to stay the fuck away from her... it could be a problem. And more problems wasn't what they needed at the moment so he found Clay and went over to talk to him.

He also accepted that there was no fucking way he'd get into that little bitch's pants and that was a bummer. She seemed to be up for some good fun.

-o0o-

Happy left Tig, fuming. He hadn't meant to tell him that. That they were married. He could've said ex-wife but he didn't want to call her that. She was his wife.

When he'd noticed Jo and Tig go over to the pool table he followed Koz to watch. He couldn't help himself. He knew Jo and he knew she wouldn't fall for what Tig was doing. And she knew better than to fuck one of his brothers. There was no way in hell she'd do that.

Tig's question about when she started hustling had made her stiff up. He didn't think anyone else had noticed, maybe Koz, but he saw that look in her eyes and before he had time to stop himself, he gave her a smile. He used to do that before, to calm her down when people poked and she was bothered. It had been a thing between them to show they knew the other one was uncomfortable or pissed and just... to calm the other one down.

Her extreme embarrassment when they told Tig the story about her nickname had made him laugh. It was very hard to get her embarrassed but he loved when it happened.

He'd almost forgotten how she got that nickname. It had been his birthday and they'd been together for some time but she hadn't been going to the clubhouse for more than a couple of months. She'd gotten piss drunk and that had been the second time he'd seen her like that. And Bowie was right, she'd been shoving peanuts down which meant she got thirsty and drank even more. Finally he'd picked her up, carried her to his room and claimed some of the birthday presents she'd promised him. Even if she hadn't been marked as his at the time they all knew she was off limits. The first time he took her to the clubhouse as his girl, he'd made it very clear by holding a hand high up on her shoulder, just one hand, it was all it took and they knew to stay the fuck away from her.

When he heard the song 'Hurricane' that night, he turned towards her, or rather watched her more closely, because he knew she loved that song. And she'd been singing along while looking at Tig and suddenly he hadn't been all that fucking sure that Tig hadn't managed to get her interested. He kept telling himself that it wasn't like that, she just sang along in a song she loved. Then Tig, the fuck, took the opportunity to give her a hug when the song was done. Once he leaned over her, like he was trying to kiss her, that's when he'd had enough.

Happy sat down on his bed and all those damn memories of her kept coming back in his head. They'd been doing that all fucking day. Seeing her with Tig reminded him what it was like to be with her and to bring her to the club. She wasn't shy even if she knew her place. She didn't stay away from others but she still kept her distance and made sure others knew she was his.

If she'd been there as his today, while playing pool with Tig, she would've met his eyes now and then with a small smile, or bumped his leg with her cue when she walked past him, just to show she was thinking of him. And he missed those small signs. He had caught himself waiting for it more than once while watching her.

Years ago, If he got fed up first at a night at the clubhouse, he'd find her, put his hand on her neck and she'd end whatever conversation she was in and follow him to his room. If she got tired, she'd come over, whisper something that turned him on before saying goodnight to all the others. It usually involved her waiting for him naked in his bed and wanting him to keep her warm. Jo easily got cold when she was sleeping.

All those things, how to behave with others and towards him, a woman's place in the club, her status among the women or whatever, anything, wasn't something he had to teach her. She'd picked it up really fast all by herself and he loved it. He loved having a girl and later Old Lady and Wife who never meant trouble. Even the way they fought was her adapting to all that. She would've never yelled at him in public, screamed or made a spectacle of herself. She was really fucking good at it at home but not among others.

She had never stooped down to trying to make him jealous, even if he'd imagined her doing it once or twice, but in truth she never did. That wasn't what she was doing with Tig either. Happy had done it, more than once and not just during this lockdown. But she would never disrespect him in that way. Or in any other way in public.

That was one of the things Koz had been pissed about. That she was always extremely respectful towards Happy and he wasn't treating her the same way. Koz was still pissed about it.

Even if he missed her sometimes he hadn't though of her that much the last few years. When the lockdown came up and Koz insisted on following to Charming he'd been surprised. Koz generally tried to stay away from Tig and then it had hit him why. It meant that Jo was somewhere in California and that Koz wanted to make sure she was safe.

Happy'd refused to think about her, hoping that Koz wouldn't be stupid enough to bring her to the clubhouse but of course he did. He wanted her safe and it was the safest place.

Happy had managed to convince himself that he was over her, that he just waited for her with that blond in his lap to show her he was over her. The second she walked inside he knew he wasn't fooling anyone, least of all himself. And watching her with the others, both Tacoma and Redwood, how easy she fitted in made him want to be able to say she was his girl. Be proud of her. That was probably part of the reason why he told Tig that she was his wife.

He missed her, all of her, even the fact that she had serious intimacy issues, that it took him years to make her trust him or tell him things about herself.

There was no way he could trick her into anything, there was no point in making up plans or grand speeches from this point on. Once he'd rattled her there wasn't any other way than showing her how he felt and take it from there. Prove to her that he missed her and that he'd do his best to not fuck up again.

He stood up and walked back and forth in the room a few times before making up his mind. Best thing would be to give her another day but he was on a tight fucking schedule and he had very little to bargain with.

When he'd made up his mind, he went outside and towards Koz' room.

* * *

_I obviously don't own the rights to Bob Dylan's 'Hurricane' but I love the song. In fact, I love that entire album 'Desire'. It's magnificent and that song makes me smile like an idiot. Almost as much as I smile when I listen to "Tonight I'll be staying here with you"._


	7. Pacta Sunt Servanda

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you so much for your reviews, follows and favs! I honestly didn't intend the last chapter as a cliffhanger but realized that it kind of was when the reviews started coming. Sorry about that. Anyway, I was going to publish some other stuff but didn't want to keep you waiting so here it is._

_A special thank you goes as always to the amazing **Simone Santos**. Make sure you check out her stories. She's got a new Kozik one up that I really like, 'All Good Things'._

* * *

**7: Pacta Sunt Servanda**

_Agreements must be kept_

-o0o-

Happy was on his way to Koz's room when he realized something. She'd gone to bed but it was pretty recent. Jo was always at her best when she'd just been woken up, she was calm and almost cuddly. So waiting for her to fall asleep would make it a bit easier. So if he took a beer in the bar and gave her a while, he might catch her at her best.

Even if he hadn't made any plans or prepared any speeches he knew roughly what to do. He was going to offer her a deal and the only thing he had to bargain with was those fucking divorce papers. At the same time it would show he was serious. When he and Jo made a deal it was for real and they would both stick to it. That was one of the first thing they had agreed on when it started to dawn on her that he didn't keep her around just for easy pussy.

-o0o-

Five months after Jo's twenty-fifth birthday the two of them was in his bed. Happy liked her room but he didn't like the rest of that house, or the people she lived with. He'd nagged about it for two months and finally she told him to shut up about it, stop fucking her or take her to his place. He took her to his place. It was ok since she liked clean as well. She didn't make a mess and he could have breakfast before going to the clubhouse. No fucking way would he have breakfast in that disgusting kitchen at her place.

He'd asked her how she cooked and it turned out she never did. Not even breakfast. She ate out and added that restaurants was a great place make some extra cash. As far as she was concerned, eating at a restaurant was a free meal or possibly even a good income.

He still though she was too skinny, her tits were basically her nipples, her ribs clearly visible, her mouth crooked, her nose big and she was unbelievably fucking sexy. He had even told her all that. That she wasn't his type and that in confused him.

Straddling his lap she stroke his nose with hers and gave him a big smile. "Perfection eventually gets boring, imperfections catches your eye and makes you interested." She kissed him. "It's the same with looks and personality. I'm full of flaws and you're trying to figure out what they are and how I got them."

She was right. He was a private guy but she took private to a whole new level. The only friends he'd met were the ones she lived with and he knew she had others. She had never mentioned her parents and when he asked her who'd trained her she asked him what 'Unholy Ones' meant. And they had a Mexican standoff.

At the moment she was blissfully quiet though and sleeping next to him. Curled up like a child, that's how she always slept. Trying to get warm and sometimes she moved closer during the night so he'd warm her. The only time she looked vulnerable was when she was sleeping.

"Jo," he mumbled and tickled her side, basically tapping her ribs. "I want you to come to the clubhouse with me."

"What do you need help with?" she half yawned and turned around to face him but her eyes were still closed.

"We don't. I want you to come with me as mine."

"That's a really bad idea, Hap." Her eyes flew open and she sat up and stared at him before backing out of the bed. "Why would you even want to do that?"

"They know something's up. I don't fuck the sweetbutts anymore and I haven't spent a night there in months." He sat up and pulled her back down, holding her still against his chest, nibbling on her neck. "They think I have a dirty little secret."

"I'm ok with being your dirty little secret. I'm not that big."

All in all, it was probably better if he kept her a secret, for her own safety but he still wanted the Tacoma guys to know who she was. If something happened to him he wanted someone besides Koz to know he was seeing her. Koz knew about her, how often he met her but being Koz, he kept quiet about her.

"I don't want the entire club to know but I want this charter to know. If something happens to me. So they can keep you updated."

Moving away again and leaning on one elbow she pointed between the two of them. "What does this mean?"

"What?" Jo had the strangest questions sometimes.

"You and me. What are we? If you start introducing me to people, what does that mean?"

"Depends. If I take you to the club I'll tell them you're mine."

"Yours?" She sat up and he let her. "Like your possession?"

"Yes, but it's not what you think. Means you're off limits to them and that I'll take care of you."

"I don't need anyone to take care of me, Hap." She started to get out of the bed again and this time he let her. "And for the record; every time someone's said that to me they've screwed me over."

He wished she told him more about herself, that way he could figure out why she reacted the way she did to things. Like now, what the fuck did that mean ' every time someone's said that to me they've screwed me over'?

"Baby, why are you like this?"

"Like what?"

"You don't tell me shit and when I ask stuff you do this." He got out of the bed and followed her out of the bedroom. She also quite often responded to a question by kissing him and grabbing his dick. He tended to loose track when she did that.

"It's not like you tell me shit either, I thought we both wanted it like this. I thought..."

"Thought what?" He watched her grab the clothes that were spread around the place as she moved towards the door.

"That this was sex. I... I'm not sure. Fuck!"

"Jo, get back into the bed." He took the clothes from her hands. Her comment about him not telling her shit either gave him an idea. "Jo, don't make me tie you down."

"Fine." She glared at him and walked back into the bedroom. "But I'm only doing it because I know you _would_ tie me down."

"Good girl." He pushed her back into the bed and laid down on top of her.

He leaned down and tasted her mouth, carefully sucking her lips, licking them and playing with her tongue. When she realized that he wasn't planning on talking anymore she relaxed and he felt her move her arms around him. He didn't stop, moving her further up in the bed he sat up and pulled of the panties she put on when she tried to storm out of his apartment.

He'd met so many girls over the years who had tried to be mysterious in an attempt to peak his interest. It had never worked since, in general, they had all been dying to tell him everything and most of it had been pretty fucking boring. Jo didn't, in five months she hadn't told him shit. Nothing. Sure, they talked, but everything she told him was smoke. Nothing of any value at all.

He knew the name of all the people she was living with, her favorite ice cream (mango), favorite juice (also mango) favorite fruit (a wild guess?), that she didn't like dogs (too needy), or cats (stuck up fucking animals), never went to the movies, never watched TV, that she knew loads of things in strange areas and he'd figured that most of them was to make her a better hustler or something about history because she liked that. Basically all sorts of crap but nothing that explained anything about her. Who _she_ was or her background.

The other tricky thing was that she was trained to be charming if she wanted to and very good at steering a conversation into a completely random topic with strange facts. She'd done that quite a few times until he figured it out and lately he stopped her by kissing her. That was a sure way to throw her off.

When she was trembling in want for him he entered her, he took it slowly, still kissing her and when he looked, her lips where swollen and cheeks red. He held and even, calm pace and when she put her leg around his hips and down the back of his thigh he held grabbed a hold of on of them and the other hand he fisted in her hair.

Picking up the pace he tried to ignore how fucking good she felt and instead he studied her, waited for the perfect moment and when she was just at the edge, her chest even starting to flare up, he stopped. Grabbed a firmer grip of her hair and laid down heavily on her with his head next to hers.

"My dad left when I was five and my mom took care of me by herself." He kissed her earlobe. "Your turn."

"W-w-what?" She turned her head and looked at him.

"I told you something, now it's your turn to tell me something about yourself."

"Are you shitting me?" she said once she managed to gather herself. "You're holding my orgasm hostage until I share some childhood trauma with you?"

"Borrowing it," he chuckled. 'Holding my orgasm hostage', she sure had a way with words. "And don't even try to lie to me."

She tried to push him away but he didn't budge, instead he kissed her neck. Finally she laid still, and when he rose a bit she turned and looked at him, glared at him, basically trying to make him disintegrate with the help of those brown eyes.

"Fine," she gritted her teeth. "I grew up in the system."

Now that, that was something about herself, something that explained her and who she was. But he wasn't going to think about that now, just save it for later. He got up on his elbows but when he reached for her mouth she turned away her head and instead he kissed her cheek.

"Thank you."

"Gonna give me that orgasm now?" she said with a sarcastic tone.

"Absolutely."

"Good luck with that."

"Is that a challenge, sexy? You know I love those."

She still wasn't looking at him so he once again leaned down, kissed her entire neck, from the ear and down to her collarbone and his way back up, underneath her chin before kissing and nibbling all the way down to the other collarbone.

There were things he wanted her to tell him, but there were other, useful, things that he could figure out by himself. And five months with a girl who didn't want to talk about herself meant a lot of fucking. Especially since her reaction to him poking was to try to turn him on. Quite successfully most of the time.

He knew everything about her body and how it reacted to him touching it. Her entire neck, from the ear down to the tip of the shoulder, from below the collarbone and back to the top of the shoulder blade was extremely sensitive, on both sides. So was the area between the adam's apple and the point between her breast. Her left nipple was much more sensitive than the right and if you scratched the inside of her thighs, especially while going down on her, she went crazy. There were other spots as well, but those where the best. If kissing didn't count, kissing made her practically melt. But he wasn't sure he'd be able to keep his tongue if he stuck it into her mouth at the moment.

While kissing, nibbling and licking all the soft spots on her side he slowly picked up the pace again. He almost laughed when he realized that she stubbornly wouldn't move. He went lower, first to the not so sensitive right nipple, and when he felt the first twitch in her thighs he moved to the left and that's when the first moan slipped out of her mouth, even if she tried to hide it.

He didn't stop and he had to give it to her, it took him longer than expected. But that didn't mean that very long, even with the very abrupt stop and the slight state of shock he'd put her, she'd still been on the very edge of coming. So when when he felt it closing in and she was still trying to fight it, he rose up to lean on one hand above her and moved the other to the inside of thigh, almost at the groin. He heard her groan, almost in protest and then he scratched.

"Oh, you motherfucker!" she yelled and he felt the first proper cramp but he wasn't done with her yet.

He grabbed both her hands and pinned them over her head, his own arms straight, hovering above her to be able see her, all over, all the way down to her crotch and his dick buried deep inside her. He looked for a second, pulled out and when she arched up, he _slammed_ into her again and got another high pitched yell. He did it over and over again and when she wrapped her legs around his waist again and rolled back her head in and extremely intense orgasm he wondered how he could ever have thought she was anything but beautiful.

Because she was and she was his girl. And the though of that, and pleased with the fact that he'd made her come really loudly for once, he leaned down and kissed her still pretty swollen lips. And feeling her all around him and her pulsating around his hard-on meant he lost it and just a few thrusts later he came as well.

He rolled down next to her while breathing heavily. She wasn't the only who'd gotten an amazing fucking orgasm from that.

She was quiet for a while before moving up on her elbow and putting her other arm over his chest.

"I don't trust you."

He opened his eyes and tried to focus his eyes on her, still panting. "What?"

"I've never actually said that to anyone but I trust you enough to _tell_ you that I don't trust you. And that's not a bad thing."

"Explain, babe." His brain was still mush and he wasn't sure what she meant but at least she was talking.

"I mean, I've trusted like two people in my entire life. And at least I trust you in some ways." She laid down her head on his chest.

He shook his head and laughed. "Ok, Hon'. Thank you."

She looked at him for a while longer. "Can you promise me two things?"

"What?" He moved up to lean slightly against the headboard to see her better.

"If we make a deal, always stick to your end. _Always._ If you don't like the deal just tell me but if you agree you better make good on it."

"I promise." He liked the idea of that as well because it went both ways. And he understood why, the comment on being screwed over and her growing up in the system meant that people probably had gone back on shit so many times. She needed to be sure he'd stick to his end of deals and he didn't have a problem with that. "If you promise me you'll tell me something if I do. We both share shit."

"Ok," she said after some hesitation. "Second thing; never hold orgasms hostage again."

"I wasn't holing it hostage, just borrowing it," he laughed and when she sat up to hit his chest he grabbed her hands. "So I'll guarantee interest. Agreed?"

She glared for a while, then he saw her lips crack into that smile that he was becoming obsessed about, before she laughed. "Ok, if it's proper interest, I'm fine with it."

-o0o-

Kozik came out from the bathroom and zipped up his pants just in time to get pushed back in by Tig. The croweater he just got a well deserved blow job from was still in there. Tig pointed towards the door and looked at her.

"Out!" He waited while she left, all the time staring at Kozik who wondered what the fuck this was about. "Hap's _wife?_"

Why the fuck would Jo tell Tig that? "She told you?"

"No, managed to get Hap did. Why the fuck is she sleeping in your room?"

"She's a friend. I'm not fucking her and even if you say to Hap that I am, he won't believe you." He pushed Tig to the side. "Get the fuck outta my way, you're not getting anything from me about this."

He walked back to his dorm to check on Jo and hear if she knew more about Tig and Hap. But she was already asleep. A knock on the door drove him out from the bathroom and when he opened, it was Hap.

"You told Tig?"

"He found out." Hap's uncomfortable face helped Koz to finally puzzle the pieces together and he smiled.

"What did you do, attack him when he pushed up on her?"

"Something like that. She awake?"

"No." He moved to the side to show Hap the bed and Jo sleeping in it. "Slept when I got here."

Without taking his eyes of her, Hap walked further in, dug in his pockets and handed him a key. "Take my room."

It wasn't that he hadn't entertained the thought of just putting the two of them in a room and lock the door before. Not this particular time but when Jo was still in Tacoma. And he also knew that Hap probably had an idea of what he was doing. He'd been with the woman for five years after all. But still...

"Bro, really think that's a good idea?"

"Take my room."

Hap didn't leave much up for discussion but Koz knew that if this went south, Jo might rip his balls off for leaving her here with Hap.

"Hap, I'm telling you, if you hurt or scare her..."

Hap shook his head. "I won't."

"I'll ask her tomorrow and if she even hints..."

"I won't fucking hurt her." He looked up and then around in the room in a slight amazement. "Did she clean your room?"

Kozik sighed. Those two and cleaning... "Yeah." He walked to the door but turned around before he left. "Don't make me regret this. I'm not cleaning up after you again so don't fuck this up. I'm done with this drama."

Hap didn't even turn around to look at him. He kept his eyes on Jo and Kozik had a feeling it might turn out ok after all.

-o0o-

Joanna woke up from someone stroking her hair. She managed to open her eyes and flew towards the headboard when she saw Hap.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" She half expected to wake up properly and realize that it was a dream. And the thought if this would good down as a wet dream or a nightmare also flashed through her mind.

"I want to talk. It's easier when you're sleepy," he added the last part with a smile.

She looked around and the fact that this was really happening started to set. "How did you even get in here?"

"Koz let me in."

"That fucker." She tried to rub the sleep out of her eyes. "Where is he?"

"I sent him to my room."

What did that mean, was he planning on sleeping in here?

The first months after she left, she'd been so pissed at Hap. Furious and then something happened. She woke up realizing she was searching for him in the bed. Sometimes when she had a hard time sleeping, her arms physically ached because she wanted to hold him so bad.

Hap was always warm and she wasn't so she loved to snuggle up against him. It had taken about six months before she really liked it but once she did; she hated when he was gone and he knew it. The first thing he did when he got home at night was hold her to get her warm. Probably to generally rub up on her as well but she liked that part to.

Sitting, really sleepy on the bed with Hap in it made her remember those things again. And that they never really ended stuff.

"Since I'm stuck with you for tonight," she sat more comfortably, "what do you want to talk about?"

"Anything," he said and sat more comfortably at the bed. She wasn't sure she liked it but kept quiet and he cleared his throat. "I hear you're living with surfers. Did you pick up surfing again?"

"Yes."

"Where are you working?"

"Delivery service." She couldn't help the smile. Then she laughed, she couldn't help herself, Happy was way out of his element. Small talking. He looked like he was about to throw up. It wasn't that they didn't talk but not like this. The poor sod was really trying and she... liked it. She decidedly like that he was there too. "You don't have to do this. I'm... I'm fine. We're ok."

"We're not ok. If we were you'd be butt naked in my bed."

She laughed again. "Actually, I wouldn't be here. I'd be in Tacoma, waiting for you. Probably butt naked though."

"No you wouldn't. You sleep in PJ when you're alone."

"That's true." She looked at him for a while. Five years hadn't changed him much at all. "That's not what I meant by us being ok though. I meant you don't have to try to small talk. We were never much for that anyway."

When he reached for her she didn't turn away and he ran his thumb along her nose and his big hand was on her cheek. He rubbed a couple of times on the bump over the bridge and he looked... so ashamed.

"I'm so fucking sorry, Peanut," he mumbled, still not taking his eyes off her.

She turned her head into his hand and kissed his palm. "I know you are." She closed her eyes and when he lifted her into his lap, she didn't protest. Instead she moved closer and turned her head into his neck, inhaling deeply. "I'm sorry too."

"Lets make a deal."

"A deal?" That was a big thing and he'd stick to whatever he was offering and if she agreed, she would too.

"Yeah. Give me this week, no arguing, no ignoring, no... being bitchy Jo."

She chuckled into his neck. "Bitchy Jo?"

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." He meant no ignoring him, among other things. Or being bitchy, she knew she could be that. Like she'd been when he came to the room earlier that day. "What do I get?"

"If you still want me to sign those divorce papers at the end of the week, I will."

She pressed her nose into the hollow above the collarbone. "What else do I have to do?"

"Nothing, just... give me shot."

"Ok. But if you rub up on some other bitch again you might as well sign those papers immediately instead of at the end of the week."

She felt him grab her hair and when she leaned back he looked her right into the eyes and she could feel her stomach twist. They were so soft, but also a bit sad and he had a tiny smile on his lips. His hand came up to her cheek again.

"I know. No rubbing up," he said and was still smiling.

Joanna was holding her breath because it looked like he was about to kiss her and she wasn't sure how she'd react if he tried. But instead he hugged her again and she leaned her head on his shoulder.

"So if Kozik's in your room, are you planning on sleeping here?"

"I can take the floor if you don't want me to keep you warm." He held her firmly but she still felt that she had that opportunity to sneak out of his arms if she wanted to. She liked that. And she was cold.

"You can keep me warm." She kissed his neck and felt him shudder. "Like you used to."

"Ok," he mumbled into her hair.

She laid back down with her back towards him. She heard him undress behind her before slipping underneath the cover, pulling her towards him. She folded her legs and pressed her feet between his thighs.

"Fucking hell, babe! I'd forgotten how cold your feet are."

"Sorry."

She closed her eyes and pressed her back against him. He hugged her even closer and she sighed. She'd missed this. There could be some real trouble for this but at the moment she only wanted to enjoy it, not think about the rest of the shit that could come out of this.


	8. Vi Naturae

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Again, so humbled by the respons of this story. Thank you! Let me know if you have any questions and you can find me on twitter as well._

_And I'm gonna thank **Simone Santos** in each and every chapter since she's such a support and help._

_Another huge thank you goes out to **HankLover** who beta read this chapter and taught me some differences and similarities between English and Swedish I hadn't been aware of. Among other things. Make sure you have a look at her story as well, It's amazing! You can find both her and her story among my favorites._

* * *

**8: Vi Naturae**

_force of nature_

-o0o-

Happy took a deep breath when Jo moved closer and hugged her. He was pretty satisfied that he'd thought of going to her when she was asleep, because he knew for certain it wouldn't have been this easy ten minutes after he sent her to the room, pissed out of his mind about Tig pushing up on her.

Instead of worrying about how that would bite him in the ass later, he pushed his nose into her hair and drew a deep breath. The feet between his thighs were finally a little less like ice cubes and Jo was breathing calmly, she was asleep. He held on to her even tighter, mainly so he wouldn't start feeling her up. He really wanted to do that, touch her all over. With his nose still in her hair he closed his eyes. There was stuff to do tomorrow and he was gonna spend a better part of the day lying down staring at a fucking compound. He needed his sleep.

That was at least one thing she wouldn't hold against him, that he would have to handle club business a lot of the time these coming days. She had early on decided to just take the club as a part of him, accept it and him for what it was.

-o0o-

When they'd been together for ten months he managed to convince her to go and see a movie with him. She agreed, if she could pick what film to see, and she chose some weird German movie about a chick running or something like that. He still wasn't really sure what it was about because when they were standing outside waiting for it to start, Lee called and needed him to come to the clubhouse. When he turned to Jo she laughed, took one ticket from him and started to walk inside without waiting for him. She gave him a final smile over her shoulder and winked. She knew he wasn't going to follow her.

Even if she tended to be pretty ok with him disappearing now and then on a seconds notice, this time was different. He'd been fully prepared to come home to an empty apartment or at least a really pissed girl, but she was asleep in his bed, and he carefully woke her up.

"Peanut," he nudged her cheek with his nose. "How was the movie?"

"Really good," she mumbled. "Don't think you would've liked it though."

"It was in German."

She put her arms around him and gave his jawline some light bites, "Is that you agreeing with me?"

"Yeah," he leaned back and looked at her. "Not gonna give me shit about ditching you?"

That made her laugh and she pushed him to his back and straddled him. "No," she said and leaned forward to give him a kiss. "Cause you're gonna make it up to me."

"Yeah?"

"Yup. You're gonna make me cum several times."

He sat up with her still in his lap. "I can do that."

Afterwards, he lay next to her, looking at her. She opened her eyes and smiled.

"So where would I have to ditch you to make you pissed?" He was just curious. He'd insisted on that movie, nagging her about it and saying it wasn't normal to hardly ever have had seen a fucking film. He'd basically dragged her there and then he left her and she didn't seem to care.

"Well, in the desert, along a high way or in the middle of the ocean. All those would piss me off."

"If I made sure you had a ride home?"

"If you made it up to me and made sure I had a ride home, I'd be fine with it." She put her hand on his cheek and smiled. "Oh! Or if you ditched me among armed men getting ready to kill me. That would _really_ piss me off. Other than Sons."

"If I killed them first?"

"And made sure I had a ride home?"

"Obviously." He was amazed and she was driving him insane, in a good way.

"Then it's fine," she laughed and suddenly stopped. "I shouldn't laugh about it. It could probably happen."

"Nah, we'll make sure you're always safe." He pulled her closer. "Why?"

"Why, what?"

"Are you so fucking ok with this?"

"Because," she said and laid on top of him again. "It's in you nature to put the club first. So I've chosen to see it as a force of nature. Sometimes they call and you leave." She gave him a kiss. "And if I want to be with you that's a part of the deal. Being ok with it."

He rolled over to his side, still holding her. "That simple?"

"As long as you come back, feeling a bit bad about ditching me, it's that simple." She gave him a big crooked smile. "And, I have some bad habits as well. You seem ok with them so I'm trying to get over some of yours."

"Like picking pockets and hustling big guys at bars?" She nodded as an answer. He ran his finger through her long curls and gathered her hair at the back of her neck. Holding on to it. "I love you."

"Wow." Fear flashed across her face for a second before she managed to hide it. "I was kind of safe in the assumption that _that_ would never happen."

She'd told him more about herself since admitting she grew up in the system. Her mom overdosed when she was three, she had some vague memories of the woman but not many. No one had any idea of who her father was and even if Jo had never said it, Hap had a feeling it might be some John or pimp.

The first family she was placed in kept her for a few years, treated her like their own, until they managed to get pregnant and that was it. She was moved from one family to another until she was fourteen at which time she'd enough and ran away. That was the short story. The longer one included one family after another of mothers who vowed that they loved her and always would and then sent her away. The other families were the ones who wanted the money coming with her and Jo had admitted she still to this day didn't know which kind was the worst. Another thing he suspected was that as she got older, the men in the family might've had a different interest in her.

So he wasn't surprised that him telling her he loved her scared her. He'd known it would but had still done it. She needed to hear it and it was true. He did. He also knew that he would have to keep taking it really slow with her.

He was still holding on to her hair to make sure she kept looking at him.

"I'm not one of those bitches telling you I love you to calm you down or to get your trust."

"Ok."

"I know it freaks you out."

"Then why?"

He smiled. "Cause it's true." He kissed her. "And I know you love me."

"Asshole," she laughed. "So sure of yourself."

"Yup. Just don't think you recognize the feeling."

"I do," she mumbled. "I've loved someone even if it wasn't like this."

"Ah," he let go of her hair. "The trainer?" He hadn't missed the fact that she in that sentese admitted that she loved him, just not in so many words. It didn't matter; sooner or later she'd say it.

"Yes."

When they'd been together for a year he got sentenced to six months along with Bowie and Lee. He wasn't sure she'd stick around but she did.

It was the first time he had a girl who came to visit him when he was inside and the first time he had someone waiting for him when he got out. He'd had other relationships but they'd all left when he was sentenced, or for other reasons. Mostly they couldn't stand the club. Or rather coming second to the club. Jo didn't care.

Kozik had looked in on her, taken her to the club and helped her out when she needed it. She'd gotten into some trouble and Happy had made her promise to stop pickpocketing, it freaked him out that she was doing shit like that when he couldn't keep an eye on her.

When he got out, she was at the clubhouse waiting for him. The feeling had been... great. It meant a lot to him and a month later he told her he wanted to ink her. She said no.

-o0o-

When Happy woke up it took him a few seconds to figure shit out. He was close to pushing Jo out of the bed thinking she was a sweetbutt but when he remembered the night before he hugged her closer instead. She wasn't cold now, not at all.

Jo turned around and putting her arm around his waist she pressed against him. It was morning. He had a boner and she knew he did. Every guy had a morning boner and her rubbing up against him meant it wouldn't get soft any time soon. If ever.

He looked down and smiled when he saw her. She was looking up, her chin against his chest and a smile on her lips. When she saw his smile she reached up and then her soft lips were on his. Jo had amazing lips, warm, never dry and at the moment his lower lip was between hers. When he felt her tongue runnig along it he smiled and opened his mouth a little, hoping she'd get the hint. And of course she did.

He ran his thumb along her spine, all the way down, until he found the curve of her cheeks and he covered her behind with his hand and held on to her. He even pulled her slightly closer, pressing his hard on towards her. The moan that escaped from her encouraged him but he was also a bit cautious.

"Peanut..."

"Don't," she interrupted him. "If you start talking I'll start analyze what we're doing and what'll come of it."

That did it. He was going to shut up. So he gently moved her to her back and watched her take off her t-shirt. He chuckled when he grabbed her waist with both hands and stroke them up her body to her tits. Circling her nipples with his thumbs, he smiled.

"Still don't know how you do it," he said when he leaned down and licked her soft lips again, "turn me on like a floodlight."

Her hands were on his cheeks and as she tasted him, she stroked his nose with hers and smiled. "I'm a talented girl."

He reached down and pulled off her underwear and was thrilled when he noticed she helped him, seemingly as eager as him. Once they were off he ran his fingertips along the inside of her thigh and up to the apex of her legs. She lifted her hips in encouragement. He had missed her like this, moaning underneath him and getting wet for him. He kept kissing her, teasing her and when she went for his boxers with her hands and used a foot to get them all the way down and off, he knew for sure he would get some. That hadn't been certain, she could've caught up on what was happening at any second and stopped. He groaned into her mouth and wriggled his hips to help her. Fuck! He had missed all of her.

When he positioned himself at her opening, she closed her eyes but he couldn't. He wanted to see her and as he pushed, feeling her insides clench around him, her head fell back and he moaned. Fully sheathed, he took a deep breath, closed his eyes and tried to regain at least some of his self control. When she spoke, he opened his eyes and met her beautiful warm, brown eyes.

"Was this the plan all along?"

Carefully, he kissed her while pulling out and she moaned into his mouth. Her entire insides seemed to try to suck him back inside in protest and he plunged back into her with a deep groan.

"I don't plan that far ahead with you." he admitted before pressing his tongue inside her moth again to keep her from talking. He couldn't fucking focus on talking right now.

He kept moving and almost lost it again when she wrapped her legs around his hips and he reached even deeper.

"Why is that?" she whispered and when she sucked on his earlobe he had to halt again to even be able to answer.

She was driving him mad, she'd always done that. Sex with Jo, her lithe body wrapped around him, soft lips and teasing voice and her entire sexy being, meant he lost any ability to function beyond his moving hips.

"Most of my plans involving you are shot to shit."

She needed to stop talking and he knew she wouldn't be able to once he picked up the pace, so he did and he was right. Her eyes closed again and she was held on to him hard, squeezing him between her thighs with her arms around him, hugging him as close as possible. Her grip on him was almost desperate, and he knew just how she felt.

"Hap! Oh, my God!" When she arched he slipped his hand around her back and tried to pull her even closer. He wanted to be as close to her as possible.

When she came, her chest flared up in red, all the way up to her throat. He kissed the mark, licking between her breasts before taking her nipple into his mouth and sucking hard in hope of extending her orgasm. As expected, that made her cry out again and holding her tight, he came as well.

His eyes were closed with his head resting next to hers and he felt her heavy breaths matching his own. He raised his head and while still inside her, he stroked her hair out of the way and kissed her again. "You still have the best pussy."

She opened her eyes and laughed. "You sure know how to flatter a girl."

Her legs were still firmly around him and he was about to tell her other things, how much he'd missed her, missed this, when the door swung open.

"Hap! Oh, shit."

He turned around and threw the pillow at the same time. "Get the fuck out, Koz!"

Koz was holding his hand over his eye but it didn't hide the big, annoying smile. "Sure, sure. We're rolling in twenty."

He walked out and when Happy looked at Jo she was smiling. "Sorry, Peanut."

"Think he's seen your naked ass more than once." She pushed him to the side and got out of the bed. He kept looking at her when walked into the bathroom.

It didn't matter that Koz came in, nothing fucking mattered at that moment. Not that he hadn't gotten around to telling her those things because he knew that she already knew that. It didn't even mattered what he'd promised her, because he was going to make damn sure it didn't come to that. He had her back with him and he was going to show her that she belonged to him. _With_ him.

After pulling up his boxers got up and met her at the door to the bathroom. "You ok?"

"Not sure. I'm feeling a bit off."

Fuck! Why was she feeling 'a bit off'? She seemed to notice his confusion and pulled him down for a kiss.

"I mean literally, I'm not feeling well." After another kiss she continued into the room. "Probably a cold or something, and you probably have it too now."

That was just her teasing. He was hardly ever sick and she knew that so he caught her again and gave her a kiss.

"Move your shit into my room."

"Sure about that?"

He held her neck and kissed her before looking into her eyes. There was no way in hell she would stay in Koz' room. Not now. "Move your shit into my room."

"I'm bringing the sheets."

"No need. Mine are clean." He'd made sure he had clean sheets, he liked to change them if he brought some bitch to his room. He gave her another kiss. "I have to go. We'll talk later."

She nodded and left the bathroom. When he left the bathroom a few minutes later he saw her in the bed and he leaned over her.

"Don't you dare be asleep in here when I get back."

"Can I be asleep in your room?"

He laughed and kissed her forehead. Koz was waiting outside the door.

"You're working fast." Koz said with a smirk. Happy didn't answer him. "Does this mean I get my room back?"

"Yeah."

"Good. Getting tired of quick blow jobs in the bathroom."

-o0o-

The next time she woke up Joanna was soaking in sweat. She managed to get out of bed for a shower but just getting out to the bar made her sweaty again. Her head was aching and so was her throat. Bowie was sitting at a chair and she went to him.

"Hey, Jo. You look like shit."

"Yeah. Felt a bit off this morning, but not this bad."

"From what I heard you got you some Hap but no fuck bug should hit that fast," he said with a smirk. "I'll find some pills and shit for you."

Obviously the word was still spreading fast as hell between the guys. "Legal stuff, Bowie."

"Sure. Get back to bed."

"I'm supposed to move into Hap's room."

Bowie looked at her and smiled. "I'm guessing that unless you're dying there won't be an excuse in the world that's going to help."

"Doubt it."

Bowie got up and shook his head. "I'll help you."

"I'm bringing the sheets."

"Think you'll need them?" He looked surprised. "You know how he's with messes and dirty things."

"He said that but I'm fucking bringing those sheets." Just to make sure they weren't soaked in some other bitches sweat.

Bowie helped her and once it was all done she needed another shower. When she got out Gemma was sitting in a chair, waiting for her. She pointed at a tray.

"Got one of the girls to fix you breakfast."

"Do I need to worry that she might've spit in the food?"

"I watched her do it, and she wouldn't dare. There's some pills for you there as well." She looked around in the room. "Have to say, thought it'd take him longer to get you in here."

"I'm gonna blame the fever if that's ok with you?"

Gemma laughed again and put out her cigarette. "I'm not falling for it but you keep telling yourself that, darlin'." She stood up. "Need anything else?"

"No, I think I'm fine for now."

"Make sure you eat and take those pills before you pass out again."

Once Gemma was gone Joanna looked at the food. There were some sandwiches, coffee and a big pitcher of juice. She took that and swallowed the pills before she drank the rest of the juice. She found her pad and started to read but it didn't take a full ten minutes before she was asleep again.

The next time she woke up, Bowie was in the room with another pitcher full of juice.

"Mango," he said when he poured a glass for her, "I remember it being your favorite."

"Thanks." She sat up in the bed and looked at the bowl he had on the trey. "Soup?"

"Noodle. And you're going to eat it." He sat down in an armchair he dragged to the side of her bed. "He'll take my balls if I haven't made sure you've eaten and drank properly. And I know you like food."

Joanna sighed and started eating before taking some more pills. "I'm going to need nose spray as well."

Bowie didn't say anything, he just pointed at the table at the nose spray already sitting there. "What did he say?"

"About what?"

"How did he convince you?"

"Bowie, you know me better than that."

"I'm guessing there's no point in asking why you left either?"

"No," she took the cup of coffee. It was filled with milk. "You made this coffee for me, didn't you?"

"Remember you like your coffee with so much milk it looks like tea."

"Thank you." She was strangely touched about him remembering that.

When he left she lay back down and fell asleep again. She always slept the entire time when she was sick, basically waking only to drink and take some pills before going back to sleep. Somewhere in the back of her mind she assumed that this wasn't what Hap'd had in mind when he got her to agree for the week but she was too tired to care.


	9. Gesta Non Verba

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you so much for all your support, you're truly amazing and also a special **Simone Santos** who's a constant support and for all those awesome mails and discussions. Make sure you check out her stories as well._

* * *

**9: Gesta Non Verba**

_deeds, not words_

-o0o-

Happy walked into the clubhouse and was stopped by Gemma.

"She's sick."

"What?"

"Just fever. She's in your room. We thought it was better if she stayed in there instead of running around, spreading that shit." She looked at a watch. "It's been a couple of hours since Bowie got her food so I'll send someone with something for her."

"Thanks," he said with a nod and continued towards the room.

When he cam inside he noticed that Jo was sleeping and he smiled at the fact that she'd brought those sheets anyway. He opened a window to get her some fresh air. He put away the gun and went into the bathroom to wash his hands and face.

There was a knock on the door and when he opened it, a croweater handed him a trey with enough food for him and Jo. He took it from her and slammed the door shut.

"You could've said thanks," Jo mumbled from the bed.

"Sit up," he said instead of commenting on her trying to make him behave. When she did and he sat down on the edge of the bed handing her a bowl and taking the spoon. "It was a sweetbutt," he explained when he started to feed her.

"Hope you say thanks after they give you blow jobs at least." He didn't answer that comment either, just kept feeding her soup from the bowl she was holding in her hands. "Can't believe you're feeding me."

"I've done that before when you were sick."

"You're really trying, aren't you?"

"Yes," he admitted. There was no point in hiding it and also, she liked that he made an effort.

"Thank you."

She was red and sweaty, her eyes glossy and tired. He stroke the hair out of her forehead and noticed that she was burning up. He searched the tray for some pills and handed them to her.

"Take these and I'll take you to the shower."

"I can walk, Hap."

"I know. I'm just trying to see you naked again."

"Guessing this wasn't a part of you plan. Me being sick." She gave him a tired smile and he laughed. He didn't mind at all.

"It's ok. You're always really nice and cuddly when you're sick. It'll make it easier."

She laughed as well before drinking the juice. "Sadly, I think you're right."

He knew he was right. She was always like a little girl when she got sick, wanted him near and loved when he laid next to her and stroke her hair. It was also the only time she let him wash her hair simply since she got so weak from a fever, she didn't have the energy to do it herself. Not just her hair, he got to soap up her entire body and that was hot as hell..

The fever also gave her cramps in her legs and she'd have him massage them for hours. Again, he didn't mind, he never minded doing stuff that meant he could touch her all over.

When she'd finished the soup and the juice he pulled her out of bed and into the shower.

"I've had two showers today, Hap," she tried to protest.

"Take another one. You'll feel better."

"I take it you're coming with me?"

"Without a doubt."

She'd have to shoot him to stop him and he followed her inside and took the soap to wash her body. When he started to wash her hair he noticed her watching him with a smile.

"What?"

"Most guys in your situation would be all sweet words you know."

"Like you'd fall for that."

"Like you'd know how to do that," she teased him and he gave her a kiss. "How's your mom?"

"She hardly talked to me for two years after you took off. Said I was a fucking idiot."

"You told her what happened?"

"No, but she assumed it was my fault and that it was bad." He took a deep breath, he wasn't sure if he should tell her this or not. He didn't want her to think he was trying to make her feel bad. "She's sick."

"Sick?"

"Some shit with her lounges, it's pretty bad."

"I'm sorry, Hap." She put her arms around him and hugged him, adding small kisses over his chest and his hard on pressed against her belly.

"She'd want to see you."

"I'll go and see her. I promise."

He knew what that meant. She'd go and see her no matter how this ended and that was at least something. When he hugged her tight he looked at the back of her left shoulder, where she had his ink. He still loved seeing it there, it had taken a lot of convincing to get her to agree to it.

-o0o-

When he for the first time told her he wanted to make her his Old Lady she didn't even hesitate before saying no and he'd been stunned. He realized that she didn't understand how big it was to him, but even when he explained she still said she didn't want a tattoo, his or any other.

It had been something he brought up now and then and she said no. Finally it started to piss him off, it meant a lot to him, he'd never offered it to anyone before her and the woman refused. They ended up having a huge fight about it.

"I don't have any tattoos, Hap, and I don't want any. I'm ok with those, they're you, but that's a different thing."

"It's not just a fucking tattoo. It shows you're my Old Lady."

"I get that, you've explained that, thousands of times, and that it means you'll take care of me and that I'm your girl."

"Exactly. And me asking you is like any other guy asking you to marry him. It's like a biker marriage." The look on her face made it very clear that it was a very bad example but it didn't stop him. "So this is basically me asking you to marry me and you're throwing it back in my face."

"I'm not a biker!" she yelled.

"But_ I_ am and you're with _me_," he screamed back.

She stood quiet, biting her lip and then went up to him and put her arms around his neck. "I'll do it. _If..._" she added when he gave her a gloating smile, "you marry me too."

He knew what she was doing. She though it would freak him out. "I'll marry you if I get to decide the design."

"Wouldn't you anyway?"

"Yeah but now you can't protest," he kissed her. "You thought I'd flat out refuse."

"Yeah," she admitted and her cheeks got a bit red. "I was pretty damn sure."

"Well, that backfired, you're gonna marry me and get my ink." He kissed her again and he was fucking thrilled about how that turned out.

"Your mom will love it."

She sure would. His mom was crazy about Jo. He'd introduced her to some girls before and she'd hated them all but Jo passed her very tight net. She adored her and kept telling Happy to be careful and not do anything stupid.

He knew why this was all hard for her, she'd never had a family and the foster system hadn't treated her well. She hadn't told him the details and he wasn't convinced he wanted to know. Living on the streets, staying away from the cops for four years had made her very, very careful with who she trusted, if anyone. When he went inside he suggested that she'd live in his apartment and she refused. When he got out he suggested it again and this time she agreed.

"Wanna know what the ink will say?"

"I assumed I'd get the usual one."

All clubs had their own design of Old Lady-ink. Charming had the crow, New York had the M-16 scythe, Belfast had the reaper and so forth. It was different parts of the logo in different designs. Tacoma had the crystal ball with the anarchy A held by the skeleton hand and she'd get that, with a small addition.

"I'll add some details."

"I'm guessing it will be something in the line of 'This ass is mine'." She glared at him and he smiled since she wasn't far off. "I'm deciding were though. I don't want it in my forehead."

"No, it'll be here," he said and put his hand on the left shoulder blade and gave her a kiss.

"That's ok."

"Property of Happy it'll say underneath it."

She laughed and shook her head. "Ok."

"Really?"

"It could be some philosophical mumbo jumbo of belonging to happiness."

He hadn't thought about that. He didn't want it to be perceived like that. It should be a clear statement that she belonged to a man, to him. He would have to think about it.

Three months later they got married and his mom cried the entire fucking time. There was an old man there that was Jo's guest. Actually, he was her only guest. He greater her like a relative, they hugged and talked for a long time. Several times during the night she went over to him. When they were in the hotel room he asked her.

"That was him, wasn't it?"

"That's who?"

"The old guy. That's the one who trained you."

She turned her head and kissed him. "Yes. That's him."

It took years before she introduced him properly but that night he told her what Unholy Ones meant. That had been the deal after all.

When they got back from their weekend honeymoon of massive amounts of fucking, he inked her. 'Property of Mr. Lowman'. It pissed her off a little but he made it up to her. With interest.

-o0o-

Kozik was in the bar when Hap came back outside from the dorms.

"How is she?"

Hap shrugged as he took a beer. "Still sick."

"Is she sleeping?"

"Nah," Hap turner around and looked at him. "Said she wanted to talk to the guy who hadn't had enough pussy the last few days"

Kozik laughed. "I'll go and have a look."

"Bring juice!" Hap yelled after him and he went into the kitchen to get some.

Jo was still awake when he came and he shook his head when he saw her hair. It was a complete fucking mess.

"Don't get why you let a bald guy wash your hair."

She smiled and reached out for the juice. "He's trying to be nice and I'm letting him."

"I know." Kozik sat down in the chair next to the bed. "Sorry about this morning."

"No you're not. You're fucking thrilled you got so see that."

"Yeah," he nodded in agreement. "I am, even if it meant seeing his naked ass."

"Like I said to him. Doubt it's the first time."

"Not even the first time I see his naked ass between your legs." Jo was drinking enormous amount of juice between the sentences. "Want me to get you more juice?"

She shook her head while drying her mouth. "No, I think this is fine." She put the glass on the bedside table. "You don't have to hang out with me. Go and get laid, I've cock blocked you the last couple of days."

"He said you wanted to see me," Kozik was a bit confused now. "Besides, I've handled that outside the room."

"Still. I bet there's more fun things to do than hang out with the sick chick." She laid back down. "And I didn't ask to see you. Guess he just wants to keep me entertained."

Kozik got up and pulled the cover over her and kissed her forehead. "He knows I owe you."

She gave him a small smile and was almost half asleep. He sat back down and looked at her. It was Jo who had cornered him in the Tacoma clubhouse and said that she knew he was doing drugs. That wasn't something you forgot. He though he was so careful, that no one could notice but she did. And she didn't give him any option, any chance to fix it himself, she went directly to Lee. At least that's what he thought at the time, he found out later that she'd talked to Hap first.

He had been so pissed at her and once he was released from the Son's Rehab, a cabin in the woods, puking his guts out and a pain that he had never thought was possible, he had refused to even look at her.

Finally, she cornered him again, yelled at him, that she loved him and if she hadn't she would've been ok with him killing himself slowly. When they both calmed down she told him about her experience with drug addicts. A friend who kept saying he could fix it if she just gave him more time and she gave him more time. Then he OD and she didn't want Kozik to do the same.

He was so deep in his own thoughts that he didn't notice her talking again. He looked at her and her eyes were open and fixated at him.

"Sorry. Didn't catch that," he admitted.

"I missed you. Missed having you around and someone to talk to."

"Missed you too, Peanut." He leaned forward and took her hand. "These guys are hardly made for heart to hearts."

"What were you thinking, just now?"

"When you sent my ass to rehab." He kissed her hand and put it back down. "Still owe you for that."

She only smiled and didn't answer the statement, instead she lifted her cheek to him, "Give me a kiss and go out and get some pussy."

"Ok, _mom_, I'll do that." He kissed her cheek and took the empty juice box. "I'll make sure you get more of this."

"Thank you, Koz." He was on his way out when she yelled again. "I love you, you know."

He turned around. "I love you too, Pixie. Get some sleep and feel better."

Hap was in a couch when he came back outside and he sat down next to him. "She wants more juice later."

"I'll bring it."

Hap seemed to be avoiding looking at him and he couldn't for the moment figure out why. The first year or so, Hap had been cautions when it came to him and Jo but he had never said anything. You didn't mistrust your brothers and he had no reason to. Kozik loved Jo, he thought she was great but that was it. Even if it hadn't been obvious that she was all about Hap, Koz had quickly gotten over that attraction of her, if he'd ever had it. It was more curiosity.

Kozik had been on to her and Hap when she helped them at the opera. When she answered his comment about the tits, it was Hap she was looking at, not him. When she said she might have drink with the target after the performance, Hap's eyes grew even blacker and once she came back to the clubhouse, Hap took her to her car and they talked for a long time. Kozik didn't normally challenge his brothers claims on women and he would never do it with Hap. Jo was the first girl he'd seen him even remotely interested in.

Over the years she became one of his closest friends, they talked about everything. He suspected that he knew things about her childhood that Hap didn't know and if he was honest about it; it made him proud that she trusted him like that. She didn't trust that many people. There was probably quite a few things about her that Hap knew and not him but that wasn't the point. To him, she wasn't just Hap's girl, she was his friend. And when a friend needs your help, you help.

Hap had never comment on the two of them in any way, except when she took off, that time he was pissed but Kozik had seen her, what had happened and was prepeared to do whatever she wanted him to, no matter what the cost. And Hap being the way he was, he ended up respecting him for it even if it bothered him.

"If you fuck up again, I'll do the same thing," he finally said to Hap who turned around and looked at him.

"I'm counting on it," he said and got up. "Just any juice or did she insist on mango?"

"She didn't say anything but I'm guessing mango'll help you get into those panties again."

Hap laughed, "Tig had some interesting thoughts about those panties."

"Bet he did that depraved fucker."

He watched Hap getting into the kitchen and came out with juice and something that he thought was oranges. Koz smiled, the fucker really made and effort. He wasn't that surprised, he knew he wanted her back. There was no fucking way Hap would let this opportunity slip out of his hands.


	10. Sub Rosa

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_I was going to publish the last chapter of 'Give it a Day' but it still needs more work, being the last chapter and all so you'll have to wait a little longer for it._

_I've had some questions about what Jo looks like and I'll add her image to my profile. There's more info at the end of the chapter and if you don't want to ruing your own image of her, just ignore it._

_As always, thank you to all of you, for reviews, favs and follows. And thank you to **Simone Santos** for being an amazing support and help on this story. Make sure you check out her stuff as well._

* * *

**10: Sub Rosa**

_a. Under the Rose_

_b. In Secret, Privately, Confidentially_

_c. In the Middle ages a rose hung in the ceiling of a council chamber to indicate that what was said in the 'under the rose' was not to be repeated outside._

-o0o-

Joanna noticed when the bed dipped and felt Hap's body against her back. The creek told her that he was leaning against the headboard, and with the assumption that he was planning on sitting up for a while, she almost fell asleep again.

Almost, then she felt it; the smell of oranges. She turned around and when she looked up at him he held out an orange wedge for her.

"Did you take them from the fridge?" She asked and when he nodded she sat up next to him. "You're really bringing out the big guns."

Without answering he held up a box of mango juice and when she looked at him he had a big smile on his lips.

"You slick fuck, always knew how to get me."

He gave her more orange and kissed the top of her head. Hap was never much for talking to her to tell her how he felt. He did things, small things, to show her he paid attention. He knew that she liked to eat juicy oranges when she was sick, cold ones, and these had been in a fridge. He knew that her favorite juice was mango. When she was sick she wanted to be cuddled and he had washed her hair earlier and now he was letting her cuddle up against his side. With the exception of holding her while sleeping, Hap wasn't big on cuddling.

"My legs hurt," she mumbled as she kept taking and eating the orange wedges he gave her.

She always had cramps in her legs when she had a fever. It could hurt as hell but at the moment it wasn't too bad. But she still liked to get a massage, especially one of his.

"Really?" he said with a teasing voice. "Want me to fix it?"

"Yes, please."

"Get rid of those plush pants."

"Still not a fan of plush?"

"No." He moved down the bed and sat beside her and pulled of her pants. Then he sat down between her legs, indian style, pulled her closer with her legs resting over over his. He smiled as he put one hand each on the back of her thighs and gently started kneading. "Like that?" he smirked when she started to moan.

"Yes."

He moved his hands down to her calves and massaged all the way back up.

"Lift your ass, baby."

She chuckled when he pulled down her panties before going back to massaging the back of the legs. Still moving his hands he leaned forward and kissed her hip and up her stomach.

"Tig had an idea," he said and licked her lower rib.

"From what I've heard his a perverted asshole so I'm not sure I want to know."

She moaned again when he started to knead harder and he kept kissing her. She opened her eyes again and looked down at him, he let go of her legs to lean over her.

"That since you're a couple of degrees hotter, your pussy would be as well."

"And you'd like to check?"

"I would like to check," he confirmed.

She put her leg around his hips, kissed up his neck and lick his earlobe. "Knock yourself out."

His hand ran along her side, over her stomach, between her legs and gently pressed a finger inside her, not for one second letting go of his mouth with his. She closed her eyes again and moaned.

"Hot?" she asked in an exhale.

"Oh, yeah." He licked her lower lip. "I seem to remembering it always being pretty fucking hot but it might be a little hotter now."

"Might taste different."

It was worth a try but it was also stupid. Slipping up once and have sex with him could be excused. This was just her... overindulging on him and wouldn't help her thinking about stuff at all. At the same time. Why the fuck not? Sex was the one thing that was never a problem between the two of them. It was always more than good, they never argued about it and it never ended with anyone of them being disappointed. Ever.

So she let those nagging thoughts go again and felt him smile against her lips.

"I'll check."

The second Hap's tongue hit her clit she was reminded why having sex with him was like a fucking drug.

-o0o-

Happy woke up in the middle of the night when Jo tried to sneak out of the bed.

"Taking off again?"

She laughed and shook her head. "I'm soaking in sweat. I'm just taking a shower, go back to sleep."

Once she was gone, he realized that both he and the sheets were soaked in her sweat as well. He changed the sheets and then went into the bathroom after her. When he stepped into the shower he leaned his hands against the wall with her between his arms.

"I changed the sheets," he mumbled into her hair. "I'll get more juice and pills for you before you go back to sleep."

"I can get them, Hap."

"Don't want you running around half naked among the drunk fucks out there."

She turned around and put her arms around him and kissed his chest. "It's strange."

"What is?"

"It's like there's been not time at all. And at the same time, like it's been forever." She looked down and ran her fingers over the smiley faces on his side. "You've been busy."

"Needed to get some shit out." He pushed away from the wall and caressed her face. "Some crazy bitch took off and I handled it my own way."

Jo smiled at him and turned her face to kiss his palm. She used to do that often before and he liked it. Just one of her little quirks that he had almost forgotten about.

"Sorry."

He took the soap and started to wash her. "Think you'll ever trust me again?"

"I trust you enough to tell you I'm still a bit scared of you."

A week in lockdown wasn't the right week to show her he wasn't a scary guy. On the other hand; she already knew he was and had never had a problem with it. None of it. She'd known exactly what he was and what he did long before she married him. The problem was that she hadn't known _she_ needed to be scared of him until he fucked it up.

"How much?"

"Don't know. I know... that here, when you're like this, I don't need to. It's just..."

"You're afraid that I might snap."

"Yes." She avoided looking at him and he raised her face to force her to. But he didn't say anything, he just kissed her. For Jo it was never what you said, he could promise her the moon and it wouldn't matter. He'd work his ass off for years to get her to trust him. She moved her hands up and stroke his eyebrow. "Got get me those pills and juice."

"Ok, Peanut."

He dried off, pulled on a pair of jeans and went out to the kitchen. On his way back with the juice and pills he ran in to that blond, whose name wasn't Tiffany. He'd called her that and she got pretty pissed.

"Looking for company?"

"No," he said and kept walking.

For five years he'd nailed every bitch he could as long as they were blond, tall and had big tits. Anything that didn't remind him of Jo. He took them from behind, hard and told them to scream out loud. He didn't want those quiet moans that reminded him of Jo. If she was pissed he could get Jo loud but none of the bitches did those honest loud cries, it was all fake and it suited him fine.

When he walked back inside the room, Jo was sitting on the bed, waiting for him. She held out her glass so he poured her juice and put the pills in her other hand. She took them and emptied the glass.

"We need to talk, Peanut."

"I know." She moved up in the bed and sat to lean against the headboard. "I know what you're doing too."

He chuckled and sat down next to her. "What am I doing?"

"You're attacking me when I'm vulnerable. Can't hustle a hustler, honey."

She didn't seem to notice but it was the first time she'd called him that. "I would never try to hustle you." He put his arm around her. "I'm not going to promise you shit. I don't do that."

"I know."

"And I'm not good at sweet talking."

"No you're not," she laughed when she said it and shook her head. Then she looked up at him. "Those are some of the things I like about you."

"I'm not saying I deserved all that much, but five years and all I got from you were divorce papers?"

"I know. I didn't know how to deal with you. And it's not like you were looking for me."

That made him laugh. "Are you kidding me? I know you, I wouldn't have been able to find you. I knew I had to wait for you to come to me."

"And... I was still scared and angry... and..." she didn't want to say it.

"You hated me?"

"I don't know."

"I hated you." She snapped her head towards him and stared at him. "I some ways. For leaving, not even giving me a chance. I thought what we had was worth more than that."

"So what's you plan with this?"

"Thought that was obvious," he laughed. "Not like I'll find another one like you."

She gave him a small smile. "Did you look or were to you busy burying yourself in blond pussy?" He nudge her side and she laughed. "Don't even try to deny it. You were rubbing my face in it when I came here."

"I wasn't looking. I wanted you."

Why would he? How many women like her were there out there? That grew up like she did, had the education she had and was so ok with everything about him?

It had taken him years to get her full story. From being found with her dead junkie mom and until she walked into the bar he was in. The only way to get her to talk was to share. In the beginning it was as weird to him as it was to her. Something happened after they got married and he'd met her trainer, Marcelo Dipierri. That seemed to have been what was needed to get the last parts of her, meeting the guy who made her.

So he knew that she was one of a kind and he'd been the luckiest fuck alive to be able to keep her.

"I still love you," she mumbled into his shoulder. "And I missed you."

"Missed you too, Peanut." He laid down and pulled her with him. "Go back to sleep, we'll talk more tomorrow."

-o0o-

Jo listened to Hap's breathing while trying to fall asleep. They were always 'bed talkers'. They talked in bed and she had no idea why. Maybe because a lot of their time was spent among others and none of them were comfortable with showing emotions or talking to each other around other people. Their bedroom was their world and they talked freely there.

Another reason was probably that they both were busy people and most of their time together was evenings and nights.

-o0o-

Joanna was in bed next to Happy, reading. She though he was asleep until he turned around and started speaking.

"Explain it to me."

She put down the book and looked at him. "Explain, what?"

"How it's really done, pickpocketing." He pulled her down next to him and held her. "If you do, I'll tell you how to clean a gun."

"Wow, whatta offer considering that guns freak me the fuck out," she laughed.

"You could help me clean mine," he was still holding her tight. "It would be very hot."

"Not gonna happen," she gave him a kiss. "What is it you want to know?"

"How did you start?"

"Marcelo saw me picking pockets and though I was just lucky. Then he followed me for two days and realized I had a talent for it. So he had me started as a runner."

"What do they do?"

"That's who you hand the loot to. He knew I wouldn't disappear with it because I was dying to have him teach me." She laughed when she remembered the first time she saw him on the bus. He caught her eyes and picked a watch from the man standing in front of him. "He dazzled me the first time I saw him and I wanted more than anything to be half as good as he was."

"So he, what? Had you train on him?"

"Some of it. But the actual lifting is such a small part of it." That was the first thing he taught her, the technique was important, the act was everything. "You always talk about my charisma and how I blend in. I was trained to do that. Both of them and to know when to use what."

"I like you best like this." He pulled her closer and kissed her nose.

"Like how?"

"Joanna."

"Charmer," she laughed but deep inside she liked it. "The main thing with the technique is to understand pressure. A greater force makes a lesser disappear. So when I snagged you watch, it wasn't so much that my hand was on my cheek. I put pressure there so you wouldn't feel what I was doing around your arm."

"Interesting," he said but his hands were all over her so he had stopped listening, she knew that. "When you talk like this, all educational if feels like I'm at that place. That myth," he mumbled and now his mouth was on hers.

"What myth?" In all honesty, she wasn't really listening to him and was a lot more focused on what he was doing. Especially with his hands.

"Seven clocks or some shit like that."

She laughed, "It's not a myth." He stopped dead and she opened her eyes. "Why did you stop?"

"It's not?"

"No. Keep turning me on." She took his hands and put them at her hips while grinding agains the thigh he had between her legs.

"Unless you want me to hold an orgasm hostage you're gonna have to answer a few questions before I nail you."

She sighed and relaxed. "The way I see it; you're already holding it hostage by not continuing. What's the question?"

"Did you go there? At the school."

"School of the Seven Bells? No, I didn't."

"But you know that it exists?"

"Yes." She kept looking at him. He was still on top of her, leaning on his hands and Jo had half given up on him starting to rub up on her again. Besides, she'd been giving up stuff to him, it was his turn now and she knew exactly what to ask.

Hap stayed quiet for a while. "He did. Marcelo?"

"He never confirmed it. It's all so secret but I think he did. The honorary codes he taught me, all of it. It adds up."

"Why is it called that?"

She was tired of him lying still so pushed him to his back and moved up to straddle him. "According to rumors, the examination is that you have to empty all the pockets on a mannequin. It's booby trapped with seven bells and you have to do it without setting anyone of them off."

"Is that even possible?"

"Yup." She leaned down and gave him a kiss. "You wouldn't believe the things that are possible."

"Give me an example," he grabbed her ass and pressed her down against his hard-on. She liked that hard on, at least she wouldn't be the only one having to wait while horny as hell tonight.

"Marcelo could steal the tie of a man."

"You're shitting me?"

"No. Not any tie. Some knots made it impossible but others he could steal."

"Can you do it?"

"Never tried and probably not," she mumbled and licked his neck.

"And the hustling?"

"This was the eightees. Pool was da shit then and you could make a lot of money of it. It was also a way to train acting."

"And?" His hands was grabbing her ass and he nibbled her jawline.

"And... he trained me. In everything. I gave him most of what I earned and he kept me safe. That was the deal." She took a deep breath. "At first I though the wanted to have sex with me so I took of my clothes and got into bed next to him. He was horrified."

She was still so fucking embarrassed about that but she'd assumed that she would have to pay for him teaching her and the way she saw it; it could've been worse. She'd had worse. He'd held a long lesson about her body as her temple and to never let anyone take advantage of her again. And added that if he found out that she was turning tricks she'd be on her own again. She was a thief now, a gentleman thief and they did things with elegance.

"But?" Hap said and she shook her head to get rid of the memory.

"It was... like an honorable thing for him. He saw a talent and he groomed it. I'm not saying he didn't make a lot of money off me but it was really about making sure I became an honorable thief. Following the rules of the trade." She leaned over him. "I think he was lonely too. I was company." She gave him a kiss. "Tell me about your first smiley."

"Before or after I nail you?"

"My turn to keep your orgasm hostage now. Tell me."

* * *

_but you can also search on youtube for 'PJ Harvey You Come Through'. It's the official video for that song and that's what she looks like as 35. The video for 'When Under Ether' works as well. I'll add the first one to my twitter account as well just after this chapter is published 'R31M4y3r'_


	11. Fiat Panis

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_As always, I'm so grateful for your support on this story._

_**MESSED UP THE CHAPTERS AND UPLOADED CHAPTER 10 ON 11. SORRY ABOUT THAT:  
**_

_In the last chapter the A/N at the end got messed up for some reason, I fixed that now. Also, I forgot to mention that 'School of the Seven Bells' isn't something that I've made up myself, it is a school rumored to be located somewhere in Bolivia. There's obviously no definite record of it really existing and if you google it you'll mostly find stuff about some indie band with that name. But you can still give it a try._

_The part that disappeared in the A/N was the info on pictures of Jo now being on in my profile._

_Special thank you, as always to **Simone Santos**, and I hope for your sake that you're reading her stories. _:-)

* * *

**11. Fiat Panis**

_let there be bread_

-o0o-

It was early morning and Kozik banged Happy's door and waited until he opened. He didn't want to catch the two of them going at it again.

"How is she?" he asked when Hap opened the door in his boxers.

"Better. Are we on our way?"

"Yeah. Ten minutes." Hap looked more relaxed that he had done in years. Jo had always had that effect on him. "Breakfast in the bar."

Hap only nodded as a response and slammed the door shut in Kozik's face. Anyone else he might've taken it as the guy being pissed but now he laughed and shook his head and went out to the bar.

When Hap came out to the bar Kozik held out the coffee cup and Hap took it. He wasn't all that worried but wanted to make sure that Hap wasn't pissed at him, for whatever reason.

"Are we ok?" he asked as Hap sat down next to him.

"Yeah. Thank you. You know, for bringing her in."

Coming from Hap, that was like someone else flashing his asshole offering a free fuck. In other words, a big thing.

"I didn't do it for you."

"I know."

"Didn't take me that long to figure out you'd end up like this though."

When he was released from rehab he crashed at their place for a couple of months. You may think you know someone but you discover new things when you live with them the way he had lived with Jo and Hap. They didn't talk much, breakfast was quiet, just basic things like asking for coffee, milk or whatever. Dinners where the same. Jo read and Hap was... Hap. Scary staring into nothing, basically.

He wondered when the fuck they talked and then he figured it out by coincident when he got up in the middle of the night to take a piss. They talked in bed and once he'd noticed it, he heard the mumbles going on for hours almost every night. And the fucking. Luckily they weren't loud when they did that. At least not that often.

The other thing he learned quickly was how they acted when they tried to piss each other off. And the second he walked in with Jo into the clubhouse and saw Hap in the couch with the blond in his lap and Jo completely ignoring him, he knew. They would get back together it was just a question of how much they had to hurt each other before admitting they still loved each other.

"Could've told me that we would."

"Nah. It's always more fun to watch you two at a distance," he laughed and Hap gave him half a smile. "And I'm not getting involved in your shit anymore than necessary."

"Asshole," Hap said but he didn't look pissed.

"I love that woman so don't fuck it up again."

Hap turned and looked at him. "I know you do." It was all he said before he got up. "Only reason I didn't kill you when you helped her take off."

It wasn't in a threatening way and he knew Hap was ok with the two of them. Ok, having her sleep in his room had been a bit too much but what the fuck! They were in a lockdown and there wasn't much room. And he'd known that him loving Jo was the only reason Hap hadn't killed him.

To be fair, the only reason _he_ didn't kill Hap after Jo took off was that he knew how much Hap loved her.

-o0o-

Bobby watched Hap and Koz leave with some of the others. He had some spare time and went into the kitchen. Half an hour later he walked out with fresh blueberry muffins, juice, coffee and pills on a tray.

Gemma stopped him, looking at the tray. "Wanna fill me in?"

"Thought she would want something for breakfast."

"With _she, _I'm assuming you mean the little hustler." She crossed her arms, "And this is not at all about you being curious about Hap's girl?"

"A little. But even Hap's girl need to eat." Bobby was still balancing the tray, stepping back and forth in one place. Gemma'd let him go in there, she just wanted to make her point and wield her control over the women first. He cleared his throat. "Especially being sick and all."

"Fine. Give it to her but behave." Gemma nodded towards Hap's room. "And if I don't see you out of there in fifteen minutes, I'm coming after you."

He knocked on the door and when it opened he was eye to eye with a confused looking Joanna. He held up the trey. "Got you breakfast."

"Coffee?" she said and looked down at the tray. "Oh, and muffins! Great!"

"Yeah. Get back into bed. I'll help you."

She did as he asked and he followed her and placed the food next to her. She looked at it.

"Is that fresh muffins?"

"Yeah," he said as he sat down in the armchair. "I like to bake. It's blueberry."

"Dang. Are you married?"

"No. Divorced. Plan to stay like that." He watched her smell the muffin. "And you're in Hap's room. I'd say that makes it pretty clear you're spoken for."

"Noli me tangere, for Caesar's I am." she said, still with her nose in the muffin and Bobby laughed.

"He's not Caesar or Henry VIII and I don't see no diamonds around you neck but I say you're still pretty correct."

"He could chop your head of though, just like Henry VIII." She closed her eyes when she put it in her mouth. "Heaven. Thank you." She opened them again and looked at him. "Didn't catch your name?"

"Bobby."

"Redwood?"

"Yeah."

"And you obviously know your Tudors and or Thomas Wyatt."

"Not really."

He'd actually been a bit surprised by that comment and even if didn't know shit about the Tudors or Thomas Wyatt, whoever he was, his ex wife had said that phrase to Clay once. It was about Gemma and she'd explained that the phrase was from a poem about Anne Boleyn and the writer was pointing out that she belonged to Henry VIII, to the king. He didn't remember much of it but that line had stuck in his mind, it pretty much summed up the status of any Old Lady, 'keep you fucking hands off'.

"Why aren't you with the others?" She held up a muffing with a smile. "As good as these are I doubt they put you on baking-detail." He was stunned when she managed to get almost half the muffing into her mouth at once. "They're heavenly," she managed to say despite a very full mouth.

"Thanks," he laughed. "I got other business to take care of later so I had the morning off."

She started on the next one after drinking a full glass of juice. With increasing astonishment he watched her empty the entire tray. When she was done she took the cup of coffee and leaned against the headboard.

"Any chance you got smokes?"

He threw a pack and a lighter to her. "Don't think anyone's gonna believe me if I tell them how fucking fast you ate all that."

"The Tacoma boys will," she said and lit the smoke. "It's a standing joke. That I eat and have the ego of a 6 foot male bodybuilder." She exhaled the smoke. "I heard someone call you Elvis."

"I'm an Elvis impersonator."

"Even I have heard of him so that means he's pretty damn famous. And you're the secretary?"

"Yeah. It's the jewish gene in me." Bobby looked at his watch. "My time is up. Gemma's gonna come crashing in any second."

Joanna laughed. "Ok. If you wanna come again with these muffins, you're more than welcome."

"I'll do that. I made a full plate so I'll send in the rest to you."

"Oh, wow!" She winked at him. "If you wanna reconsider that marriage proposal, let me know."

"I like my kneecaps."

"I get it. He's a sucker for busting kneecaps."

Bobby took the trey with a laugh but left the rest of the juice. "Let me know if you need anything," he said over his shoulder as he left and she waved at him. Gemma was already standing outside.

"Cutting it close."

"Not like I'd make a pass at the killers old lady. I was just curious about her."

"Keep that curiosity contained. It's safest."

"Sure thing!" He said and walked into the bar.

Bobby wasn't an idiot, not like he'd rub up on Hap's girl. He was just curious about her. Tig had given her an 'ok' despite being hustled by her. Koz seemed very cosy with her as well and the fact that she was Hap's Old Lady, really put her on the list for girls he was curious about. And she seemed nice, and smart. Not even mentioning she downed muffins the way other ate pralines. He was very impressed with that too.

-o0o-

They were all hiding in the woods, looking down on a red house further into the forrest. Bowie was lying next to Hap and he was bored out of his mind. They'd been lying there for hours. Jax and Clay was taking some of the Redwoods into the compound and wanted them as lookouts. They'd been stationed there in good time to keep an eye on what was going on.

"So you and Jo, all good now?"

Hap just looked at him before turning his attention back to the house with the binoculars in front of his eyes.

"Did you really expect and answer?" Lee said and smirked at him.

"Nah. Just see if I can interpret his face."

That made Lee laugh. "Yeah, cause he's facial expressions are always so revealing. Like an open book, our Hap."

"Judging by those he's constantly pissed. Even when he's smiling." Kozik hit Hap's arm. "Is even your hustler old lady capable of interpreting those."

"Here they come," was Hap's only answer and they turned to look at what was going on.

It looked safe. There were some activity behind the house but no more than usual. Two days stake out was paying off, they knew their entire security system and not even a visit from the Sons seemed to make them change it. In a couple of days they would be ready to strike. The Nords and they're drug business was going down. If the SAMCRO plan paid out fully, Darby'd end up in jail too.

None of them said anything for the full thirty minutes the Redwoods were in there and once they left Hap stood up. Bowie got up next to him and they both started walking towards their bikes.

"She is," Hap said out of nowhere and Bowie wasn't the only one staring at him.

"What?" Lee said with a smile.

"Capable of reading my facial expressions."

It was all he said and Bowie was amazed they'd even gotten that outta him. He had never comment about much when it came to Jo. Or to any of his private life.

-o0o-

Bowie had taken a liking to Jo early on. She was easy to like and it had taken him more than a year to figure out that she was extremely private. She was just hiding it a lot better than Hap did since she talked, just not about things that mattered. Still to this day he wasn't fully sure he knew the real her but he suspected he did or at least had a good idea of who she was. She was at least quite different now compared to the first year he'd known her.

She was never the kind of girl who hung out at the clubhouse. Hap brought her in for the bigger things and she was on the family dinners but never general partying. She did however pitch in when it was needed and came around during the day to play some pool or poker. If one of the other Old Ladies asked for her help she was there as well. It earned her a lot of respect.

When Hap was released from prison and they moved in together it had still taken about six months before Hap suggested they could come by his house for a few beers. Jo had been there and hung out with them for a while before she left. According to Hap to hustle some poor fucker out of his paycheck.

The second time he asked Hap if his girl wouldn't cook them something, mostly to tease him.

"Trust me, you're lucky she doesn't," he said with a snare. "Even if she manage to not burn down the kitchen, it'll taste like shit."

He'd been there once when she tried to make food. She couldn't cook for shit and she'd explained that no-one had taught her. Years later he found out that she and her trainer always ate out since it was a way to pick some pockets while having dinner. The more of those small details he found out about her, the more amazed he was that she'd even come out of it as kind of normal. Or as normal as you can be and still be the right girl for Hap.

The absolute shock came when Hap had told them they were getting married. He wouldn't have put money on that no matter what the stakes were. Ever. They all started at each other before Lee cleared his throat.

"You're getting married. Like, really married?"

"Yeah. Next month." It was still dead quiet in the clubhouse. "What?" Hap finally asked.

"Just... never saw that coming."

"She suggested it. Didn't think I'd agree. Said I could ink her if I married her."

Bowie was still shocked. Both that they were getting married and even more about the reason for it. "So you're marrying her just to... I don't know. Convince her?"

Hap shrugged. "Sure, just a paper. Ink will be permanent. If that's what it takes."

The marriage had been a quick thing with a judge and a not so quick party. Both Hap and Jo got drunk as hell before they stumbled back to his room.

Even after they were married, Hap didn't cuddle with Jo in public. Generally, the closes he came to her was a hand on her neck, halfway down her shoulder. That was it. The looks they shared was a different thing. They were damn near incident but hardly any physical contact. From what little Kozik had mentioned they were very much about the physical stuff when they were alone though and Hap seemed more than satisfied in that department. He didn't mess around with the local sweetbutts and even cut down considerably on the not local pussy as well.

None of that had ever really changed, the looks, Hap mostly keeping it in the pants, her involvement in the club or any of it.. As far as Bowie knew, everything had been hunky dory and then she was gone. Leaving an even more quiet Hap behind but then he was plowing through pussy like there was no tomorrow.

The last time Bowie saw Jo was on her thirtieth birthday and she seemed to have a great time. Hap had been in a bad mood but it hadn't stopped her at all. And that wasn't uncommon. They did fight and on occasion he'd seen them not talk to each other for weeks. It wasn't hard to tell when they were mid fight since Hap looked like he'd kill the first one opening their mouth in his presence. When she left with Hap that nigh she'd given him a big hug, thanking him for her present.

The next morning Hap walked out into the clubhouse, followed by Lee who'd paid his bail. The charges for domestic disturbance were dropped later. Koz came back a few hours later, had a fight with Hap in his dorm and that was it. Jo was gone.

He'd asked Hap _once_ where she was and he'd told him to mind his own fucking business and get a wife of his own to worry about. Koz hadn't given up any more than that.

Next time he saw Jo was when she was walking into the bar at the Redwood clubhouse.


	12. Per Os

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you so much, all of you, for reviewing, favoring, following and simply for reading this story._

_And I'll keep repeating this because this story would've been so much harder, and taken so much longer to write if it hand't been for **Simone Santos**, and make sure you read her stories, they are amazing, just like she is!_

* * *

**12. Per Os**

_a. by mouth  
_

_b. by way of the mouth_

-o0o-

Happy unloaded his shit in the room and laid down on the bed. After intense staring for hours his fucking eyes hurt. He needed to get some sleep cause they were going back out that night to check the night security as well. So he had another couple of hours of staring to look forward to. This time in night vision. Still, it mean he got the morning off duty and he was going to spend it in bed with Jo. Speak of the little devil, she came out of the bathroom and answered the door when someone knocked. He heard Bobby saying something about muffins and Jo sounded very pleased.

"In bed already. Am I wearing you out?" He took the arm from over his eyes and smiled at her. She was holding a plate in her hand. "Bobby is trying to win me with muffins."

"What kind?"

"Blueberry," she said with a big smile. "He just made me another batch."

He patted the space next to him. "Give me one?"

"No." She sat down next to him and put the plate on the bedside table, keeping one muffin in her hand. "You can have _one_ bite from this. A small one."

He grabbed her wrist and took a big bite from her muffin.

"I'm heading out during the night." That muffin had been great and when he looked at the plate she had five more. Big ones. "Give me a muffin, baby."

"No. They were for me. He said so, they're 'Joanna muffins'. That's what he said."

"You don't need five of them." He reached over her and she seriously tried to stop him. "Don't be greedy. He'll bake you more."

She glared at him. "Say, please."

"Please, give me a muffin."

"Ok."

She reached for one and gave it to him one and then sat back down next to him.

"I'm guessing you're feeling better today?"

She seemed better at least and her eyes weren't so tired. Saying she had some color on her cheeks would be a stretch but the she'd never had much of that.

"Yeah. Tired though so I can stay here and sleep with you for a while." He watched her shove the last of the muffin into her mouth. As expected, she reached for another one. Jo had never denied herself food. Ever. She'd been hungry too often as a kid to do that once she grew up. "I asked him if he wanted to marry me but he said he liked his kneecaps."

"Bobby?"

"Yeah."

"Smart man." Happy looked at her as she ate the whole muffin and when she reached for another he grabbed her arm. "I won't touch them," he gave her a kiss, "So you can save some for later."

Saving food was never something she was good at and he'd learned that if she did save something, food, sweets or whatever he needed to keep his fucking hands from it. Mainly just to teach her that it was ok to save it, that it'd be there. She'd told him about more than one family that kept locks on their cabinets and fridge. The food she had, she ate as fast as possible, it was embedded in her head so firmly that she ate anything you put in front of her. All of it.

She glared for a few seconds but then she put her arms around him. "Keep me warm?"

"Know it." He pulled her down with him and put the cover over them both. It didn't take her long to fall asleep.

Happy got up and took of his clothes and then slipped under the cover with her again. She wasn't as warm anymore so she was definitely getting better.

There was a lot of things they still needed to talk about, he knew that. He also knew that the two of them in combination sucked when it came to talk about things because they didn't talk. She talked but when it came to talking about serious stuff, she was as bad as him. To get her to talk about private things or feelings was damn near impossible. And he wasn't much better at that either.

It didn't take long before he fell asleep as well.

When he woke up there was still over an hour before they had to roll out. Carefully he stroke Jo's hair out of her face. It was short now but he liked it. She used to call it horsehair and had tried one miracle cure after another to make it soft. He had no idea what she talked about, it was soft.

"Jo," he mumbled and she stirred a bit. "Baby."

"Are you on your way?" she asked and put her arm around him. She pressed her nose into his chest. "I missed this."

"What?"

"Waking up next to you. I missed it." She traced featherlight kisses over his chest. "Took me a while before I did, but eventually I missed it."

"Good." He grabbed her butt and pulled her higher up so she was fact to face with him. "What else did you miss?"

"Well, besides the obvious. I missed living with someone who liked clean." She smiled. "I missed talking to you. Just... being around you.

"And what are the obvious things?" he teased her. He knew but he wanted to hear her say it. That she'd missed his dick as much as he'd missed her pussy.

"Your dick and mouth, obviously," she laughed and gave him a kiss. "And fingers. You're pretty good with those too."

"_Pretty_ good?"

"As far as I remember at least."

Teasing fucking bitch. He knew she loved his fingers. He'd made her cum so many times with just his hands. He liked to watch her cum without being amazed at how good her pussy felt. He kissed her, thoroughly, the way he knew she loved.

"Get out of those pants, bitch, and I'll remind you of what you thought about my fingers."

She laughed but got out of her pants and the t-shirt really fast before reaching for his mouth again.

He traced her side, over her mound and between her folds at the junction of her legs. As he had suspected, she was wet and he started teasing her, running two fingers along the sides, brushing his thumb over her clit and when she pressed against his hand he circled it before plunging two fingers inside. All the time kissing her, sucking her tongue before thrusting his into her mouth.

He kept moving his hand and when she was getting closer, he let go of her mouth, added a third finger and curled them to hit the spot and looked at her face. He was rock hard, just from feeling her around him and watching her like this.

"Hap!" she moaned.

Stroking her ear with his lips, he smiled. "What was it about my fingers?" She didn't answer and he felt her walls clamping down around him and the gush of wet. He looked at her again, her rolled back head, slightly open mouth and flushed cheeks.

"Oh, God," she moaned and arched her back when the second wave of the orgasm hit her.

He stopped moving his hand but kept two finger inside her to feel the pulse as she was starting to relax. He kissed her again.

"You were saying?"

"You're very good with your fingers," she panted.

"I think you owe me now." He was unbelievably fucking hard and rolling over to his back he nodded towards his dick. "Get up there"

"Are you going to make your sick wife work like that?"

He chuckled. She wouldn't object, she fucking loved to be in charge in the bed. "If you're tired I can go and jerk..." he didn't even have time to finish the sentence.

"Shut up," she said and straddled him. Leaning over him she smiled and he grabbed her hips. "I missed this too."

"Makes two of us," he groaned when he felt her heat as she took him inside, painfully slow.

He made her cum twice more before he allowed himself his release. He made sure to watch her when she did, he loved when she fell apart like that. Now they were both sitting up and she had her legs wrapped tightly around his waist and her head on his shoulder. When she looked up she put her arms around his neck and gave him light kisses along his jaw before licking his lips.

"I have to go soon, Peanut." He gave her a hug. "Got back to sleep."

"Wake me up when you get back?"

"You want more?"

"No. I want to know you're ok." She was stroking her nose over his cheeks now, she was always a bit cuddly and very tender when she'd orgasmed a couple of times. "I won't move back to Tacoma."

That was so fucking Jo. Out of nowhere she said things like that. While he was still inside her! Like his brain even worked with his dick in there.

"Why is that?" he finally said, trying to force some blood to his brain to make it function.

"I was on my way to move from there when I met you. I never really liked it. No surfing and too little sun."

She had never mentioned that. Not once, and had never complained about living there. He wasn't sure how he'd reacted if she'd said something. He lifted her off him and put her down on the bed before laying down next to her.

"So what are you saying?"

"I don't know to be honest." She eyed him cautiously. "But I'm not saying that... I'm done with you. I just want you to know and... fuck! I don't know. Think about it?"

"I'll think about it."

He wasn't pissed. She was just telling him her conditions and those were generally negotiable when it came to Jo. She was good that way. He would think about it but he knew that at the moment he wanted her with him in. Permanently. And he couldn't leave Tacoma just yet.

He just needed to figure out how to convince her but he wasn't going to panic about it. At the moment they were discussing where to live and that meant she wasn't going to ask him to sign those papers. At least that's not what she wanted at the moment and she wasn't the kind of girl who changed her mind about stuff all the fucking time.

There was a hard banging on the door and Lee yelled, "Ten minutes!"

"Have to go," he said and gave her another hug. "And don't think I'll leave it at that."

"I didn't. Wanted to give you a chance to come up with a good answer."

"I'm not that fucking slow, Peanut. We can talk even if I'm not on my way."

She laughed and pulled the cover over and around her. "Go and be a bad ass."

"I'm gonna lie on my stomach in a forrest, looking at a house."

"Sounds exciting. I'll be here, all curled up and naked."

"Bitch." He kissed her cheek when she giggled. "I'll wake you up when I get back."

-o0o-

Lorca was positioned next to Hap and they were both keeping an eye on the compound. Tig and some of the others were stirring some shit up so they could see how they reacted.

"How's Jo?"

"Better."

He liked Hap, a lot, but he really wished he'd been paired up with someone who wouldn't lie next to him in complete silence for hours. He'd fucking fall asleep if this continued. And if he fell asleep he was also with the wrong guy. Hap would probably wake him up by breaking one or several of his ribs.

About thirty minutes later he sighed. "Hap, I'm gonna fucking fall asleep here."

"That would be a painful mistake."

"Yeah, I know but you could at least try to talk to me?"

"About what?"

"Jo. Where has she been?"

"Don't know. Ask Koz."

This was just awesome. Trying to small talk with Hap, in the middle of the night, in the middle of a forrest, while trying to keep an eye on a fucking compound. It sucked. He wrecked his brain.

"How's that new gun?" That could get him talking, once in a blue moon. Guns.

And Hap had just bought a new gun, a Springfield XD-9 mm. They'd teased him when he bought it since it was a fucking Croatian brand but once he got it, Hap was more than pleased. Lorca had tried it and was seriously considering buying one.

"It kills people," Hap mumbled.

So obviously there was no blue moon in sight and Lorca stopped trying. Another ninety minutes later they got the call to get the hell out.

When they walked into the clubhouse the bar was pretty much empty, just some sleeping hangarounds and croweaters. Tig walked up to the bar and Lorca sat down next to him.

"Beer?" Tig asked.

"Yes please!" he sighed. "Three hours in the woods next to Hap. Tellin' ya'. I think I can count on my fingers the number of words he said to me."

Tig laughed, "So no juicy details about Jo?"

"Never gave us juicy details about her."

Hap had clamped up on anything sex once he met Jo. He slipped a few details in the beginning, before it got serious and that had just been some mentioned about her being more than capable of using her mouth. But if he told that to Tig it was quite possible he woke up with his own dick in his mouth.

"Fuck! I'd really like to know." Tig looked tired as well. "Wish she was Koz's. Can't push up on Hap's wife."

"Ex-wife," Lorca said. "But I'd say you should still stay away."

"He said wife."

Lorca turned around and stared at Tig, trying to comprehend what he had just said. "When?"

"Day before yesterday. When he told me to stay the fuck away. He said she was his wife."

That couldn't be right. He kept looking at Tig and then it hit him. It could. 'Until death do us part' was probably very real to Hap and considering how he'd behaved since Jo stepped into the clubhouse it was clear he'd never gotten over her.

Tig had a smile on his lips. "You didn't know."

"Don't think anyone knew."

"He could've just said it to be clear."

"Yeah." But Lorca didn't really believe that. Hap didn't throw things like that around him. He didn't have to. He could've just told Tig to stay the fuck away and he would've. "Did you tell anyone?"

"Mentioned it to Clay," Tig said with a shrug.

That made sense, there had been some tension and he knew that Clay and Lee had talked to Hap, if he'd be able to deal with Jo being there, so Clay needed to be up to speed about the situation. He'd done the same.

"I'm going to bed."

He walked to the dorms but instead of going to his room he knocked on Koz' door. It took a couple of minutes before he opened.

"I'm busy," he said and it didn't take a genius to figure out what he was busy with.

"Send her out."

Koz' didn't question him and a blond hurried past him without giving him a look. Once the door was closed he looked at Koz.

"They're still married?"

"Tig and his big mouth," Koz sighed and shook his head. "Yeah. As far as I know. He never signed the papers and she didn't try to send them more than twice."

"Does Lee know?"

"Don't think so. I didn't tell him, hardly even thought about it until we were going into lockdown here and she was in the area. It didn't do much difference when she wasn't around and considering where she is at the moment, it doesn't now either.."

He looked at Koz. "That's why you wanted her here."

"Yeah. She's still his wife on paper and that puts her at a high risk."

Lorca had known that they were close, Koz and Jo, and he hadn't been surprised that they had kept in touch. Even when she was in Tacoma it had been obvious and since Hap didn't seem to mind, no one else did. When she told Lee that Koz had a drug problem his respect for her had raised considerably.

It showed that she knew what was important and that she understood the club. It was better to tell and let him face the consequences than help him hide it and put the club at risk. Hap had made a good Old Lady out of her. Or she might've had it in the blood, it was probably a combination.

"Sorry to cock block you," he said to Koz with a smirk. Poor man couldn't catch a break during this lockdown.

"I'm getting painfully used to it," Koz muttered. "Get out. I need to sleep."

Lorca nodded and went to bed. He was going to talk to Lee tomorrow anyway. Even if it didn't matter anymore he needed to know and Lee wasn't the kind of man you wanted to wake up or cock block. His trigger finger got very itchy when you did.

-o0o-

Joanna woke up when Hap tugged her hair. "I'm back."

"In one piece?"

"Yup."

"Good. Warm me."

He put her arms around her and hugged her close. It reminded her of the hundreds of times he'd done it before and she still felt that nervousness leave her body before she fell asleep. She'd felt it so many times and these were very familiar grounds for her.

-o0o-

"Peanut," Hap said in her ear and she turned around. "How's my dirty little secret?"

"Good. How was Vegas?"

He had left over two weeks earlier. He called her now and then when he was gone but neither one of them was much for talking on the phone. Unless it was dirty talk, they did that and had done it this time as well.

"Good," he answered and gave her a kiss. "Worked out fine. Missed your pussy."

They had never talked about it, what he did on runs, or who he did it with. The other Old Ladies repeated the mantra 'what happens on a run, stays on a run' more often than she wanted to hear it.

Joanna wasn't the confrontational type, she was very much the kind of woman who buried her head in the sand and just didn't want to know. When it got to much she got the fuck out of there and he was no different.

Well, he was confrontational, he never let her get away with her shit but when it got too much, he screamed and got out. She always let him leave, part because she was relieved when he did and part because she knew he got so pissed that he left to stop himself from hurting her. He never had, not once had he laid a finger on her to hurt her during a fight but she knew he needed some space sometimes.

She had carefully asked Koz about it. He'd made it clear that he wasn't going to tell her shit the first time she asked. That their relationship wasn't any of his fucking business and that she should just leave it alone. He also offered her that nice little sentence 'what happens on a run stays on a run'.

Once they got closer friends he stretched that to telling her she had nothing to worry about. Hap wasn't a relationship kind of guy and the fact that he had one with her showed how important she was to him. That him tapping some other bitch didn't mean he'd even remember her name, if he by chance bothered to ask for it.

On their wedding Koz got really drunk and she sat down next to him in the corner of the clubhouse. She was fed up with people and Koz had sensed it and waved at her. He took her hand and smiled. Told her that she was a lucky girl and that Hap really loved her. A lot. So much that the other clubs had asked him if was starting to have problems with getting it up since he wasn't that active anymore. And that most of the time it was a quick blow job. Even if she would've preferred to not know that shit, she understood what Koz was trying to tell her. Hap loved her and he had changed his ways for her. That having her at home was something he though about even when he was away.

When it was her time to get piss drunk she once asked Hap about it. It was the only time she'd done it. His expression turned into the one that clearly signaled it was something he didn't want to talk bout and when she turned around to walk away he sighed and grabbed her arm. He told her it had never involved kissing, him going down on them or letting them stay the night since he met her. He nodded when she asked if he made sure to wrap up. She didn't ask anymore and when she tried to walk away again he let her.

So when he said he'd missed her pussy, she didn't ask him what pussy he'd had, instead she smiled and stroke his cheek.

"Show me how much."

With a wicked smile he gave her a kiss before he moved up and sat between her legs. His smile got even bigger when he saw the short silk nightgown she was wearing only since he knew she'd be coming home that night. He didn't take it off, only slid it up to her hips before showing her how much he'd missed her pussy by eating her out until she screamed and continued by screwing her senseless.

"Tastes like sunshine," he mumbled into her hair afterwards.

"What?"

"Something a guy said. That pussy tastes like sunshine. Yours sure does."

She laughed and gave him a kiss. He still smelled of her but she wasn't sure she agreed on the sunshine-part.


	13. Risum Teneatis, Amici?

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_I was going to update 'Sweet Things, Greedy Hands" next but then I got in contact with someone who I think could be a major help so I'm gonna hold on to it for a couple of more days. The chapter is pretty much ready, just a few things I want to check when I got the chance.  
_

_So, as an excuse, I'm giving you a chapter on this one instead. A big thank you to **Simone Santos**!  
_

* * *

**13. Risum Teneatis, Amici?**

_can you help laughing, friends?_

-o0o-

Lee was seated in church. They'd been in there for over an hour and the cigarette smoke was threatening to suffocate them. The discussions were intense and they all pitched in with details and tried to add to the plan. It was pretty much set and he was looking forward to the end of this lockdown.

When they let the others go, he stayed behind with Clay and Preacher, the president from Fresno.

"Heard anything from any other charters?" Preacher asked Clay.

"All calm. Don't think we have to worry. White hate is big but this is one of the smaller clubs. Don't got much dick to wield around."

"It's still good to have them on edge," Lee said and then turned his head in surprise when Gemma walked in, dragging Hap behind her. Once again he couldn't help thinking he'd considered slapping his Old Lady around if she ever got the idea that she could walk into the chapel whenever she thought it necessary.

"Have a word?" she said to Clay and he nodded then turned to Preacher. "We'll talk later."

Preacher got up with a smile. He could probably figure out what this was about and he nodded at Hap when he left. The word on Jo being Hap's ex wife and a possible problem had travelled around the club at the speed of light.

It had been clear early on that it wouldn't be a problem and it got even clearer when she moved from Koz room to Hap. This after Koz being thrown out of his room already the second night. The fact that Hap hadn't been the least bit rattled or out of his game had made any speculations completely shot to shit. Hap was his normal, cool and focused self and Jo stayed out of trouble, as always.

Once the door was closed, Gemma smiled at Lee, a very sarcastic smile, "They're still married."

After the initial surprise, Lee laughed out loud. That stubborn motherfucker, he should've known he hadn't signed any fucking papers. At the same time, Hap and Jo had obviously made up. She was in his room and Hap was focused. Clay seemed to be on the same page as him since he shrugged and gave Gemma a blank stare.

"So?"

She was startled for a few seconds, looked at Hap who gave her the same blank stare before turning to him and he did his best to hide the smile. Clay's answer made it clear to Lee what he was aiming for and that he probably already knew they were still married. He had no idea how the hell he did but he was sure he'd find out. Gemma put her hands on her hips and stared at Clay.

"This isn't our business," Clay said and got up. "It's between Hap and his Old Lady so stay out of it. Or at least keep me out of it cause as long as he does what he's supposed to do, I don't give a shit what their relationship status is. I've got more important things to worry about at the moment."

When Gemma kept opening and closing her mouth and Clay kept staring at her, Hap finally opened his mouth.

"Can I go? Got shit to do."

"Yeah," Lee said and smiled at him. "I think we're done here." When Hap reached the door he remember something. "Hey, I want you on the run for the AK's."

He didn't respond, only nodded before closing the door behind him. Gemma was still staring at Clay but hadn't said anything. Clay signaled to Lee that he should get out too and he was eager to leave. He had a feeling he didn't want to be there for whatever was gonna happen between the two of them.

Lee saw Hap looking at him and walked up to him.

"Never signed those papers, did you?"

"No."

"But she did ask?"

"Kinda'," Hap eyed him for a while. "She sent them."

He looked at Hap, shook his head and laughed. "You stubborn son of a bitch." He gave him a hug. "Gotta give it to you though. You won."

"Glad you noticed." He looked over Lee's shoulder and nodded to someone. "It's Chibs. We're going for those AK's."

"Ok," he said. He stopped Hap as he walked by him. "I'm happy for you, brother. She's a good girl, a good Old Lady."

"That's why I didn't sign those papers."

Lee laughed again when Hap walked away. He turned around in time to see Gemma leave that Chapel and she didn't look please. She looked pissed. She looked around then walked towards the dorms. He had a feeling he knew exactly who she was looking for. He also had a feeling that she'd underestimated Jo. But it wasn't his problem. That was bitch business and Jo could take care of herself. He didn't know much about her but he knew she'd been doing it since she was a kid and had faced far worse people than Gemma before she even hit puberty.

-o0o-

Joanna was feeling a lot better but had decided to stay in the room that day anyway. She still wasn't fit for the rest of the people and she also wanted a day to herself. A day to try to figure out what the fuck she was doing.

She was so conflicted about what had happened, it had been so fast and then she got sick. Hap being the perfect guy during that time wasn't helping at all. Or was helping, depending on what she really wanted. That was the main problem, she didn't know what she wanted. And that was the first thing she needed to do, churn out what she knew she wanted or not wanted. That's pretty much how far her thinking had taken her when she heard a knock on the door. She got up and answered the door.

"How's the little sickling doing?" Gemma said as she walked inside.

"Better." She closed the door and turned around.

"So you two are still married?"

"Yes." She had no idea how Gemma knew that and she didn't really care. Word travelled fast at a place like this normally. During a lockdown, when people lived together, it got even worse.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Honestly? I didn't think it was any of your business and I didn't think it mattered at the time."

"None of my business?" Gemma wasn't the kind of woman who liked to hear that anything wasn't her business. As far as she was concerned, everything was her business. "You don't come here, to this clubhouse and lie me right into the face."

"Has it crossed your mind that I might've been embarrassed? And again, at the time I didn't think it mattered."

Gemma eyed her for a while. "Do you think it matters now?"

"No. It's just a paper and whatever is going on between of us isn't depending on that. It's other shit."

"Then why aren't you divorced?"

Joanna was trying to decide if she should tell the truth or not and finally landed on just doing it.

"He wouldn't sigh. Sent me a note that I would have to ask him face to face. In person or in court."

"And you didn't push for it?"

"No. I didn't think it mattered. Not like I would marry anyone else."

"And now, what? You're gonna pick up after five years apart?" She had a sarcastic smirk on her face.

"And now, we're gonna figure out what we want. All by ourselves," she gave an equally sarcastic smirk back.

Gemma walked up to her, stood right in front of her and tried to stare her down. Joanna knew that Gemma wasn't to mess with but at the same time she needed to draw the line somewhere. And keeping this woman updated on what her plan was with Hap before she'd even figured it out or talked to him about it, that wasn't going to happen.

Gemma stared for a while before walking towards to the door, while opening it she turned around and looked at Joanna.

"I'm not done with you," she said. "I don't like when people lie to me." Then she slammed the door shut.

Joanna knew it wasn't the fact that she'd lied to Gemma that bugged her. It was that she got away with it.

-o0o-

They picked up the guns at a warehouse and left them at a cottage close to the compound tthat at the moment was guarded by some Fresno members. Then they went back to the clubhouse. Joanna was up and she seemed ok. She was at a table with Lee and Tig. When she noticed him she smiled.

"How's the fever?" he asked

"Gone." She stood up and he knew she wanted something so he leaned closer. "A word?"

He nodded, "Go and wait in the room."

She turned to Lee and Tig. "I'll se you later."

When she left Tig smiled. "Sending her away?"

"Don't trust you with her," he smirked. He turned to Lee. "It's all set. The stuff is at the cottage. It all looked good."

"We're riding out for some meets later and head out tonight."

"Let me know when you need me."

Lee gave him a nod and when he passed Tig he punched him in the side only to get slapped in the ass back. Jo was waiting in his room.

"What?" he asked.

"Gemma came to 'visit' me today. Really pissed."

"About us being married?" He should've known she'd go after Jo as well. "And?"

"And, nothing. Just letting you know," she moved closer and put her arms around his waist. "Now, I know you're gonna want to talk about me not wanting to move to Tacoma."

He sure did, but he hadn't fully figured that one out yet and was hoping she'd give him some more time when it came to that. "Not gonna say more about Gemma?"

Jo shrugged. "No, nothing to tell, she's just pissed. Just though you should know."

"Ok." He looked at her. "I haven't figured it out but I want you in Tacoma."

"Then we have a problem," she sighed. "I told you that I didn't want to move."

"So what's your plan? We're gonna be married in different states?"

She let go of him and took a few steps back to put her hands on her hips, looking down at her feet, taking deep breaths. Then she looked up again.

"I'm not saying I have that fucking much going for me in L.A. I could get an equally good job, probably better, in Tacoma. I still have friends in Tacoma, not just in the club, it's just..."

"Just, _what?"_

"I don't like Tacoma."

"I do got things going for me in Tacoma."

"I know. We could do the distance thing for a while."

He didn't want to do a fucking distance thing. "Great plan, Jo. Take off for five fucking years and then we do 'the distance thing for a while'." He glared at her and she gave as good as she got. "Good way to patch up a marriage."

He could see her jaws tense and he braised himself for what would ooze out of her mouth next.

"So if I want to keep being your wife, I have to get my ass to Tacoma, is that what you're saying?"

"No..." he sighed. "No, that's now what I'm saying. I just... fuck!" He ran his hand over his head and looked at her. "I want you with me. I don't want to see you at weekends and shit."

"We might be better if we're just together sometimes," she tried so he took a deep breath and looked at her with raised eyebrows. "Yeah, okay, that was a lame attempt, I know."

"Good." Despite the two of them fighting and all that shit, they were good together and she knew that. "I'm away a lot anyway. Not sure how the fuck I'd get all that working."

"No." She sat down on the bed. "So what?"

He had no fucking idea at the moment "I don't know. Can't you just take surf weekends there?"

"What makes you think it's about the surf?"

"It's not?"

"It's about the surf _and_ the sun." When he was gonna point out it was pretty fucking insulting that he was put second to the surf and the sun she interrupted him. "_And_ that.. I'm not sure about packing up and leave it all if we don't get this to work."

"It'll work."

"You don't know that."

"It'll work, Jo." He was dead sure about that. Until he fucked up, they'd more than worked. But he needed to figure this moving shit out. "Can you give me some time?"

"For what?"

"I told you, I haven't figured this out yet. Give me some fucking time and I might do that."

"Fine!"

Great, he just made her more pissed. He sighed. "Let's get out to the bar before we start yelling and shit." He needed a breather at the moment.

She didn't even say anything, just got up and stomped out. He sighed. He was so in the doghouse and he needed a good fucking idea. At the same time he needed a breather since he was starting to get seriously pissed at her. Fucking 'distance thing' and 'surf and sun'! And her thinking it wouldn't work. If that's what she though, then why the fuck should they even bother?

-o0o-

Kozik watched Jo came back out from the dorms with Hap, leave him and sit down in the couch next to him. She leaned her head on his shoulder.

"How's it going?" he asked her while looking at Hap.

"Fine, Koz. Don't worry. Trying to figure things out and we're not even yelling yet."

"Impressive." He couldn't help notice her and Hap eying each other across the room, doing their creepy 'talk without talking'-shit. "But there's something you're not agreeing on at the moment."

"There's always gonna be something we're not agreeing on." She was still glaring at Hap. "Nothing to worry about."

"Not worried."

He wasn't. He'd be more worried if Hap was buying her flowers, chocolate and told her she'd get whatever she want. Or if Jo was in his lap at the moment, giggling and giving him little kisses. That would be disturbing as hell. This was just the two of them working shit out, it was better that they did it now instead of later.

She finally turned towards him. "Get any pussy yesterday?"

"No. Lorca interrupted me to ask if it was true that you two were still married."

She stared at him for a few seconds and then she laughed. "I'm so sorry!"

"Yeah, I can hear that." He elbowed her ribs. "I know you love me though."

"I do." She crossed her fingers on both hands and held them up. "And I'm rooting for some class A pussy for you tonight. Maybe some A-courses with that heating lube."

He elbowed her ribs again. "How are you to really doing?" he said and nodded towards Hap. "Can I hope to see you in Tacoma again? Need my little nimble fingered wing-woman around, showing me the good kinds of lube."

"Ahhh," she said with a smile. "That's the fight of the day."

"What is?"

"Not too keen on going back to Tacoma to be honest."

He stared at her. "Tacoma or Happy?"

"Tacoma," Jo said firmly with a smile. "It's nice and I miss you all but..."

Even if neither Hap and Jo had told him what they were doing he knew how their relationship worked. He'd lived them for a while just after the Sons-rehab. They made deals. He'd never heard of a relationship like that. Their deals were basically contracts and he'd never heard of anyone of them going back on it. He was very aware of the fact that that's how they she ended up with ink and Happy a married man, to everyones amusement.

He'd known Jo and the obedient girl she seemed to be at the clubhouse wasn't what it was like at home, when they were in private. Kozik had seen it first hand when he lived with them.

-o0o-

He'd walked into a war zone. That's what it felt like and it gave him some clear memories of his parents and how they used to fight when he was a kid. There were some differences though, his parents hated each other. Hap and Jo loved each other like crazy but that just meant they knew each and every fucking button to push to send the other into orbit.

"This is none of you fucking business!" Jo yelled as he came inside the apartment.

"What's going on?" he asked when he hesitantly walked inside the living room.

Both Hap and Jo turned to him and yelled in one mouth. "Shut the fuck up and get out of here!"

"Fine." He turned around but instead of leaving the apartment he walked into the guestroom he was staying in for the moment.

It had been Jo's idea, that he needed a calm place but still friends around. He could've stayed at the clubhouse but at the same time he agreed with her that he'd probably just scratch the drug itch by drinking. Hap had said it was ok so he had been there for the last two months. This wasn't the first fight he walked in on and he knew that he'd see more of them if he stayed.

He sat down on the bed and waited, then he heard the door slam shut and he went out into the living room. Jo was crying on the couch so he sat down next to her and put his arm around her.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled. "This isn't really the calm environment I promised you."

"Nah, it's ok though. It's interesting to see Hap this way, out of control. Can't say that it's all bark and no bite with him but it seems to be with you."

She laughed and dried her cheeks. "I hate when he just walks off in the middle of the fucking fight." Leaning her head on his shoulder she hugged him. "Then he comes back, all calm and thinks I'm a bitch for not being over whatever we were fighting about."

It might piss her off, but Koz knew that Hap was right. She might still be annoyed by the time he got back but they never started fighting again. They usually had sex, or more like, fucked.

"What was it this time?"

"Hustling. I got into some trouble and he told me to quit doing it."

"What trouble?"

"Don't you start too!"

"Hey! Okay, but you know it's just cause he worries."

"This might come as a complete surprise to you two, but I'm actually quite capable of taking care of myself."

"Baby, don't start arguing with me too. It's not like you don't worry when he's away and he's pretty fucking capable of taking care of himself too."

She was quiet and moved back closer to him. Then he felt the first slight tremor and he hugged her closer while she started crying properly.

"Jo, it's nothing."

She sobbed. "I just hate fighting and he gets so fucking mean."

Kozik knew that Hap did, he yelled some really shitty things to her every time they fought. It made Kozik cringe when he heard it and he wasn't surprised that Jo generally ended up like this. Crying. He hugged her, kissed her forehead and cursed that black eyed fucker.

They sat there, next to each other, him with his arm around her and she crying. Finally she calmed down and fell asleep but he still didn't move. She might be his friend and Hap was his brother but this wasn't his business and no matter what he thought about it he was going to shut up about it.

Fifteen minutes after she'd fallen asleep the door opened and Hap walked inside. He sighed when he saw Jo and leaned over to carefully stroke her cheek.

"Hey, Peanut."

When she opened her eyes, Koz left them alone. In fact, he left the apartment, it was safer. He loved the two of them but that didn't mean he liked to hear them fuck.

-o0o-

Joanna woke up twice that night, the first time when he came back into he room and the second when he left. He'd told her that they'd try to finish shit that night, at least the bulk of it and the part he was needed for. The way she interpreted that was that they did the violence that night and the cleaning up the next day. It meant she'd be there for maybe another two days, maybe three. Which would be enough since they were slowly venturing into the areas they really needed to talk about and she was nervous about that. The fight about where to live was just a warm up, they both knew that.

It took her some time to fall asleep again. The third time she woke up was when someone banged the door and that was a bad sign. Sleeping at a clubhouse at a lockdown and wake up from a banging was a really fucking bad sign when Hap wasn't in the room and she basically flew to the door. It was Tig on the other side.

"What? Tell me!" she said while looking for her jeans.

"He's ok, hit in the hip, he'll be fine."

"And Koz?"

"Still out there on guard. He's fine."

"Anyone else?"

"No," Tig answered. "All good."

Pulling up her jeans she looked at Tig. "Where is he?"

"In the Chapel." He held out a hand to her. "I'll take you there."

She wasn't sure she was fully awake even by the time she reached the Chapel. The doors were closed but Tig carefully opened a crack, just enough to let her in and when she entered she knew why.

Hap was on his back with his jeans off and the boxers around his thighs. The Scotsman, Chibs, was at his side and from the smell, she'd guess he was cleaning the wound. Jo halted dead in her tracks and then she laughed. It was just so... humiliating and Hap glared at her and then looked at Chibs.

"She's laughing!"

"Wonder why," he said and kept swabbing. "Such a dignifying position for ya."

"I've been shot and you're laughing," he said and waved at her to get closer.

She sat down at one of the chairs and looked him over. "Gotta say, that reaper cut makes you look badass, but on your back with the boxers down your thighs... not so much." He pinched her and she gave him a kiss. "What happened?"

"Ricochet. Just graced me. Nothin' big."

"Bad place though. Think that's where my leg usually rests," she said with a laugh.

"Just gotta spread wider."

Chibs chucked and shook his head. "Think blow jobs or doggy style'll work as well."

"Why, thank you," Joanna said with another laugh. "Stitching and couples counseling. You're worth your weight in gold, scotsman."

"I know." He looked at Jo and smiled. "Just a few stitches and then we're done."

"Good," Hap mumbled. "You owe me a blow job for laughing."

"Want me to make you feel better?"

"Yeah." He pulled her closer. "But shut up for now, don't want to get hard now."

"No, please don't!" Chibs interrupted. "Bad enough that I'm so close to your dick."

"Tell me one of those fucked up stories. Keep my mind off shit while he's stiching."

"Fucked up stories?"

"Yeah. You know what I mean."

She laughed, she knew what he meant.

"Something with sex?"

"Yup, but not too hot," he mumbled and closed his eyes. She looked down and saw Chibs pulling the needle through. "Don't want Chibs here to get all jealous about my size."

She though for a while and then laughed.

"Ok, In the 18th century, Charles of Bourbon, king of Naples and Sicily was hunting in the south of Italy when he got a message from the Roman Ruins of Herculaneum. They'd found a statue so he hurries there. They're all tense, watching the workers dig out this statue from the Roman Empire."

"How the fuck does this involve sex?"

"Bear with me, Baby. And for the record, Romans were big on sex, even for women. They though that if the woman enjoyed the sex the kids would be healthy. From the fresks and stuff they've found they've discovered over 90 different positions described," she said and waved her eyebrows at him. "Charles VII gets all eager when they start carrying out the statue and the first thing he sees is a pair of horns and he's giddy since it looks like a statue of Pan. Then he sees the rest and it really is Pan. And with a tender face, Pan is fucking a goat."

"What?" Happy laughed

"Yup. Goat on his back with his legs spread wide getting properly fucked by Pan. Obviously, Charles is horrified and orders the statue to be destroyed and the diggings of the ruins to immediately cease."

"How do they know about the statue then?" Chibs asked.

"He changed his mind but the statue was hidden and you needed a special permission from the king to be allowed to see it."

Hap laughed. "Thank's, Peanut. 90 positions?"

"Yeah."

"Gotta be one there that saves this wound," Chibs said. "I'm done. Is it true?"

"What. The story about the sculpture?"

"Yeah."

"Sure. I don't tell lies about the Roman Empire." She helped Hap up from the table and saw him clench his jaws when he pulled up the boxers and jeans.

Hap put his hand on her should with the thumb over her neck, like he used to, and they walked out.

"How's the package?"

"Fine," Hap said. "Hitting the sack."

He gave some hugs and then his hand was back on her and they walked, slowly, towards his room.

"I'm guessing we're closing in on the end of the lockdown."

"Still owe me a full week." He said the last part with a crooked smile.

"Don't worry about it. Want that blow job?"

"Oh, yeah," he said when he opened the door. "Then I need sleep. Let's finish the fight tomorrow."

"Don't think we'll be finishing it tomorrow. But I'll give you that blow job. You deserve it since I laughed at you in public." It was a joke and he knew that. Anyone would've laughed at that.

"Yes you do." He grabbed her cheek and gave her a kiss with a smile. "It'll work. You and me."

She already regretted saying it. "I know, honey. I'm just..."

"Jo. You're Jo, covering you bases." He gave her another kiss. "Don't do that with me. We're all in or we're not anything."

Joanna nodded and gave him a hug. "Figure some shit out and get back to me."

"Get down on your knees and give me some incentive."

* * *

_Do me all a favor and google 'Pan with Goat' and imagine a replica of that on my washing machine in the bathroom. It would be so awesome! Stumbling in, all tired in the morning, and start the day with a laugh._

_And I might add that erotic art was really common in the Roman empire. They were a bit confused about that so early on they thought that every second house they dug out in Pompeii was a brothel. Finally they figured that for a town with about 10.000, more than 35 brothels was a bit much._


	14. Agere Sequitur Credere

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you so much for your reviews, favs and alerts. Also, a big thank you to those who just read the story as well. It's all appreciated!_

_So, as usual, **Simone Santos**, is my girl and a big help. Thank you!_

_**MuckyShroom** has bravely agreed to Beta read for spelling and grammar, thank you! Please make sure to check out her stories as well!_

_If you're feeling REALLY brave you can follow me, and the girls above on twitter, I'm R31M4y3r_

_All remaining errors in plot, spelling or grammar are my own._

* * *

**14. Agere Sequitur Credere**

_a. action follows belief_

_b. We act according to what we believe (ourselves to be)_

-o0o-

"Fuck!" Happy yelled and rolled over to his other side, breathing heavy. He'd managed to turn onto the side with the wound in his sleep and it hurt like hell. "Shit! Jo! I need something."

"Painkillers?" She asked when she sat up with her hair all over the place and rubbed her eyes. He nodded. "I'll see what they have."

He watched her pull up her pants and go outside. Very carefully, he sat up and lit a smoke. When she came inside she was carrying juice and handed it to him with some pills.

"What is it?"

"From Bowie, but he swore they were legal 'if you have a prescription'." She imitated Bowie's voice towards the end and Hap laughed. "They're painkillers though so they should help."

She sat down next to him in bed and when he tugged her jeans she took them off with a smile.

"You know you don't have to worry," she suddenly said. "I'm not taking you to Reno."

He knew that expression from the song 'I'm on my way to Reno'. Basically she wasn't going to ask him to sign the papers. He pulled her closer to his side and kissed the top of her head.

"Good."

"But we still have shit to sort out."

"I know."

"I still don't want kids."

"I'm fine with that." He'd never really seen himself as a dad anyway and he knew that Jo didn't see herself as much of a mom either. He was also relieved she was leaving the 'where to live'-thing for now. He needed to think about that some more.

"If I get pregnant I probably won't keep it."

That, he had more problems with and she knew that. It was one thing not wanting kids, but he had more problems with her getting rid of a kid that was his and she knew that; but he didn't know what to say. He knew that if it came to that, there wasn't much he could do to stop her.

"Honey," Jo said and looked up at him. "It's not a big risk but I need you to know that. With parents like us... how we live, I'm not giving birth to a kid with a risk that high of ending up in the system..."

"I know," he interrupted her. "I know, Peanut." He looked at the watch. "Did they have breakfast?"

"Yeah. Wanna hobble out like the wounded hero?"

"Ain't gonna be any fucking hobbling." He pinched her thigh. "You coming with me?"

"Sure."

He looked at her. "We're not done but I'm not doing this hungry and high on Bowie's shit."

"You're stalling. Shouldn't have said that you're in the clear."

"I'm not in the clear. I know that." He got out of the bed and found his jeans. He took a deep breath before pulling them up. If that fucking wound had been one inch higher the waistband would've been just underneath it. At the moment it was dead on it and it did hurt. He noticed Jo's small smile. "What?"

"Maybe you should wear some sweatpants."

He pulled her out of the bed. "I don't do sweatpants, baby."

She gave him a kiss with a laugh and waited at the door for him.

-o0o-

Joanna was at the bar counter and watched Hap at a table with Clay, Lorca, Jax and Koz. He seemed pretty close to the Charming guys. At least that's what she thought, it was never easy to know with Hap, but he didn't seem to look right through them the way he did with people he didn't give a shit about, which was most of the people on the planet.

Even if they weren't properly dealing with what had happened, the talk about kids was at least a step in the right direction. It was getting them closer and was what had set the whole shit off to begin with.

-o0o-

She was leaning against the counter in the kitchen, eating a bowl of cereal, when her eyes fell on the calender. It was still on June, neither of them had bothered to change it, so she walked over there to flip a page when something else hit her. June was blank.

Neither her or Hap was much for marking shit in the calender and she wasn't sure why they even had one; but she did use it for one thing, to mark when she had her period. She'd gotten a IUD with copper the year before and the nurse had told her to keep track and make sure to contact them if she bled very often or much at all. It hadn't been any problem what so ever but she'd fallen into the habit of marking the first day of her period anyway: and June was blank. She flipped over to May and there it was, in the middle of fucking May and they were almost a week into July now.

Joanna took some deep breaths, trying to remember if she maybe just forgot to mark down when she had it. She was searching her memory for the last time and came up blank. She'd never been very good at keeping track, hence the marking in the calender, but considering that she wasn't much for sex when she had her period she knew someone who did keep track of it. And she picked up the phone.

"_Yeah?"_

"Hey, I need to ask you something. Got a few minutes?"

"_What's up?"_

She took a deep breath, "Any chance you remember when I last had my period?"

It was quiet while he was thinking and then she heard it, _his_ deep breath, _"Shit!"_

"Fuck! I was hoping I just had forgotten one."

"_I was in Charming for a week."_

"I didn't have it then."

"_Sure?"_

"I had my hand in my pussy with you on the phone, I think I would've remembered the blood," she half yelled.

"_Don't have to yell."_

"Hap, I'm freaking out here."

"_I'll be there in ten."_

"Thank you."

She hung up. They had never talked about kids. Maybe mentioned it but it had been very clear that neither of them wanted kids, pretty much for the same reasons. Hap hadn't been in the system the way Jo had, but he knew how it worked, and with a biker dad and hustler mom, you were heading towards it with disturbing speed. Not even mentioning that neither of them were the good with keeping shit alive. He'd laughed his ass off when she bought a houseplant. It hadn't taken her a full three months to kill that thing.

Joanna walked between the kitchen and the living room, back and forth. She didn't want kids, not at all, she didn't even like them much. Some of the Old Ladies had brought their kids with them and she didn't even know how to talk to them. They'd pushed babies into her arms and it was... totally uninteresting to her. They all looked the same to her. She'd come to terms with completely lacking the 'mother gene'. Luckily she'd found a guy who seemed to completely lack the 'father gene' as well.

"Babe?" Hap said and halted when he saw her. "Okay..."

She wondered if he thought she'd been scamming him into this. "I have an IUD."

"I know."

"I wouldn't trick you. I don't even want..." She didn't get to finish.

"Babe, I know you have it," he smiled. "I've had my finger up there enough times to know that."

It took her a few seconds to realize he meant that he'd felt the strings.

"If I'm pregnant, and that's a big if, I'm not keeping it."

Hap stared at her and she could see his jaw tense. "What?"

"I'll take care of it, have an abortion. We're hardly fit for a kid and I don't want to fuck up another generation."

"We can handle it."

"Yeah, and then you get killed or sent to jail for years and I'm alone." When he tried to say something it was her turn to interrupt. "And don't even try to tell me that can't happen."

"I'm not but that's no fucking reason to kill a baby. Our baby."

"Okay! First, it's not a baby yet and second; don't get all fucking mushy and talk about _our baby._ You don't want a kid any more than I do." She was panicking now, was he really going to give her a hard time about this? She stopped and looked at him with her hands on her hips. "We're both as fucked up, that's why we work. I mean it's one thing that you're not all sweet with me but if you have a kid you need to do those things that we don't do."

"I'm sweet with you." He walked up to stand in front of her. "I tell you I love you." He must've noticed her rolling her eyes. "Sometimes."

But in all honestly, he was right, he was sweet with her. Quite often, but that wasn't enough when it came to kids, to tell your kid you love them 'sometimes'...

"Well, 'sometimes' isn't enough with kids." Joanna was at a loss. She'd thought this was a done deal, that he'd tell her to get rid of it before he even crossed the threshold to the apartment. "Hap... I can't do this. I can't be a mom and I don't want to."

He didn't say anything. He stood there and looked at her with his black eyes and then he turned around and walked out, still without saying anything. When the door slammed shut she looked at it for a long time, trying to regain some of her mind to figure out what the fuck just happened.

The rest of the day was a haze. When she got to bed, she laid on her back with her eyes open, just staring at the ceiling for a long time. Whens she heard the door she turned to her side and stared into the wall instead. She felt the bed dip when he got into it and tensed up, but he didn't pull her to him.

They laid like that, side by side for a long time until he finally spoke.

"It's my kid too."

"It's not a kid. We don't even know if it's anything." She turned around. "Happy... don't..."

"Don't do what?" he finally asked when she never managed to finished the sentence. "I'm not saying I want a kid but maybe we should think for a few seconds before we kill it off."

"Okay, you think a few seconds and tell me where you land."

She was pissed. She hadn't for a second thought she was marrying a guy who believed in the women's rights movement. Considering the ink saying that she belonged to him, the argument of it being her body probably wouldn't go down all that well. So instead of arguing she turned her back towards him again and closed her eyes.

"Not like I can stop you," he said about five minutes later. "Do whatever the fuck you want."

That was it, they didn't talk for days, or rather, he shut her out, completely. So completely she didn't even get to tell him that the pregnancy test was negative and that she'd booked an appointment to see why the fuck she didn't get her period since she wasn't pregnant. They said it probably wasn't anything to worry about and that they wouldn't do a proper check until she'd missed a few more periods.

She didn't want him to think she'd had an abortion when she hadn't and he needed to know that she wasn't pregnant either. So she went to find him the evening before her appointment at the doctors. He was at the clubhouse, sitting on a couch and had a sweetbutt next to him, not touching him, but it still pissed her off. She gave the girl a look that she couldn't mistake for anything other than a 'fuck off'. Once the girl was gone, she sat down next to him.

"Can we talk?"

"Bout what?"

"I have an appointment tomorrow morning." He eyed her while drinking his beer. "Not that, no abortion, just... an appointment and I'd like you to come with me."

"What appointment?"

It wasn't joy in his eyes, more hesitation and she knew what it was. He probably thought she was pregnant and was going for a check up and that she hadn't decided what to do yet. Now he was trying to figure out how to react. It wasn't that he wanted a kid, he just wanted a say so in the decision and she hadn't given that to him.

"I did a test and it was negative but I want them to do a check up, why I haven't had my period."

"Okay," he said, still looking at her. "We can crash here tonight."

"Sounds good," she looked over at the sweetbutt, "Are you inviting her too?"

He laughed. "No. I'm not sharing you with anyone, dick or bitch."

"Nice," she said and shook her head. "I'm going to bed."

He handed her the key and she gave Koz a hug when she passed him. Hap came about half an hour later and she waited while he got ready for bed. When he got down behind her, and for the first time in a week pulled her close to him, she pressed her feet between his thighs.

He held her tight. "Think you'll ever want kids?"

"No." There as a long, uncomfortable silence so she finally turned around. "And if I ever do get pregnant, I'll probably react the same way I did this time." Hap was still quiet. "I know you're not in any fucking way a feminist but it _is_ my choice because I'm the one who gets stuck with the kid."

"No."

"Yes it is. Just like my mom did, your mom and a whole fucking line of moms."

"I'm not my old man."

"I'm not saying you are but you're not average Joe and I'm not mother material." She wondered why the fuck he was bringing that up. "Why? You want kids all of a sudden?"

"No." He turned her round and tucked her into his chest.

You didn't have to know him well to know that was the end of this discussion. At least for now.

-o0o-

Happy had gone to bed but he left Jo in the bar. She'd been stuck in his room for days and he wanted some rest anyway. There wasn't much for him to do now, he'd done his part and the brains were taking care of the rest. Clay had said he could take the day off tomorrow if he wanted, but that he wanted him back. He and the rest of the Tacoma guys were going to stick around for an extra day, just in case. It was fine with him.

Jo came inside and smiled when she saw he was still awake. "Need anything?" Instead of answering he gave her a meaningful smile. "Besides a blow job."

"Nah, I'm good. I'll get some shut eye, you go out and talk to the others."

She sat down on the bed next to him and took his hand. "Okay. I'll be back here later."

"Fucking better get back here." He pulled her down. "Give me some lips before you go."

Instead of just giving him a quick kiss she laid down next to him. He wasn't about to complain so he put an arm around her.

"Am I imagining that you're about done here?"

"Yeah. Two more nights." He hugged her closer. "How about going to see mom tomorrow?"

"Sure. They're okay with that?"

"Yeah. Most of the other clubs are leaving tomorrow. They just want Tacoma to stay one extra night." He pressed his nose into her hair. "We never finished the kid discussion."

"No, we didn't." Jo looked up at him and smiled. "Not sure how to finish that one. I won't change my mind."

"I know." He didn't like the idea of her killing their kid. No matter what she fucking said about how big it was and all that shit. It was their kid. He also knew she'd never change her mind. "Haven't gotten you knocked up yet, though."

"No."

"And maybe we don't have to talk about that since I'm not planning on trying to knock you up?"

"So you don't want kids?"

"No, Peanut, I don't want kids."

That was one thing he did agree with her about. He didn't want kids. People like him and her, living the way they did, shouldn't have kids. It wasn't fair to the kids. He didn't judge his brothers for having them, it was their choice, he just didn't want one. Knowing Jo's story about her trip through the system, he agreed with her. There was no way he'd put a kid on the planet that was in such a danger of going through that shit. Ever.

"I know I'm poking an open wound here..."

He stopped her by giving her a kiss, he knew where she was heading. Then he leaned his forehead to hers.

"If you get knocked up, I'll back your decision. No matter what you decide."

"And you won't disappear for a week and have me find you on a couch next to a sweetbutt?"

"I didn't touch her or any other bitch that week, or any of the Tacoma bitches while I was with you," he said but she kept eyeing him. "But I won't take off for a week."

"Are we taking my car to your mom's?"

He bit his cheek to not smile. It was a very Jo way of avoiding the rest of the discussion at the moment. He gave her a kiss.

"There's no fucking way we're taking that pile of shit you call a cage."

"But you're hurt."

"Not that hurt." He gave her a hug. "How's Marcelo?" She hadn't mentioned him yet, her trainer.

There was a long silence before she looked at him. "He died, two years ago."

That was probably why she went back to LA. He stroked her lips with his thumb, Marcelo was the closest thing Jo had ever had to a dad.

"I'm so sorry, Jo."

Once he'd met the man, Marcelo came to visit now and then and he was quite the character. A true gentleman. Happy had been a bit stressed when some of the guys came over. He should've known better, Jo's trained ability to blend in anywhere must've come from someone and obviously; that someone was Marcelo.

"I lived in Berlin for a while but I kept in touch with him. He never said he was sick but then Marco called and told me that he was and that it was bad."

Marco was another kid that Marcelo had trained. He'd asked him how many kids he'd picked up during the years but it turned out to only have been three. Jo, Marco and Kevin. He'd never met Kevin but Jo had told him about him.

Out of nowhere she mentioned her 'brothers' one night. That Kevin had gotten into drugs and finally OD'd. Just after that she asked him what would happen if one of the Sons were to be addicted to drugs and he told her they'd get _one_ chance at SOA-rehab, one. The next day he watched her talk to Lee and they found out about Koz and his addiction

He'd been pissed that she hadn't told him, really fucking pissed and they'd argued about that for a couple of days. Until she told him to get his head out of his ass and focus on his friend instead of her. He was mostly pissed with himself, he should've known something was off when she all of a sudden was in such a sharing mood.

"Did you get back here in time?"

"I was here for the last three months."

It must've killed her to watch Marcelo die. "I'm sorry, baby." He gave her a kiss. "Wanna talk about it?"

She shook her head, "No. Not now at least. Maybe some other time."

"Let me know. So, Berlin?"

"Yeah, always wanted to go there. I absolutely love that city. It's... amazing." Jo moved closer to him. "I was there for eight months and I really fell in love with that city."

"We should go there."

She finally smiled. "Yeah?"

"Sure."

He'd never been to Berlin and he'd like to see it with her. They used to travel a lot, as often as they both could basically and having her show him a city she loved tended to be a great time. It would probably a good thing for them to get away for while, just the two of them.

There was another obvious perk to it too. The deal was that he'd go to any fucking city she wanted to, walk around for hours and look at things he didn't give a shit about, as long as it meant he could take her up the ass at least once during the trip. It had started as a joke when she wanted him to come with her to Dallas. It was a few months before he went inside. She'd taken him by surprise when she agreed since they hadn't done that before.

When he looked at her now, she laughed. She knew exactly what he was thinking about.

"Guess I'll keep adding to the 'Cities I've had Hap's dick up my ass in'-list," she said and he nodded. "Well, Berlin is hardly the kind of city you need to bring your own lube to. There's sex shops all over the town, in plain view. Classy ones. My favorite is the Fun Factory."

"Good. Make sure you show me that one. And whatever you've bought there." He pulled her in for another kiss. "I need some sleep, then you come back here and we'll see if we can find a position that works with my stitches."


	15. Ubi Mel Ibi Apes

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Since my super beta works fast, here's the next chapter on this story. A big thank you to the beta; **MuckyShroom** and to **Simone Santos **as well for answering my hundreds of mails._

_And thank you to all of you for reviews, favs and alerts. I'm so glad you like this story!_

* * *

**15. Ubi Mel Ibi Apes**

_a. where [there is] honey, there [are] bees  
b. you catch more bees with honey than with vinegar  
c. t__o get what you want, offer others what they want_

-o0o-

Lee smiled when he saw Jo, Koz and Tig playing pool. He knew what Tig was trying to do but he could've told him it was completely useless. If Hap couldn't break those two up, no one could. Not that he was sure Hap had tried. He'd always been very cool with how close Jo and Koz were; but then again, he didn't know shit about Hap and Jo's relationship. She was handling the situation well though. If she'd been born in another family, some rich kind, she'd be the born diplomat. He decided to help her out anyway, not just from the goodness of his heart, he wanted to hear a story from her.

"Hey, Jo!" he said when he sat down on a chair close to the table. "Share something."

She laughed. When she was in Tacoma and they had the hungover days, lying around the clubhouse, half dead, Koz used to ask her to do that. Soon they all did. It was a way to pass the time and ease up the tension. At the moment people in the clubhouse were on edge. Almost everything had played out as planned. The lab was blown up and they were now waiting for the last part of the plan to play out; the not fully necessary part, but the one Clay really wanted. It would mean that Darby'd end up in jail and if things went as planned and he wouldn't even know it was the Sons who put him there.

"Share something?" she smiled and it got even wider when Lorca and Bowie came walking over to hear it.

"Yeah," Bowie smiled. "Extra points if someone get's high as a kite."

"Nah," Lorca shook his head. "I want one with babes."

"Geez, you're really picky aren't you." Jo leaned over the table and took the next shot. "Give me a sec to come up with something."

Lee put up his hand. "As president I have veto. I want one about the perfect crime."

"Can't do that, no one knows about the perfect crimes," Jo said with a smile. "But I can tell you about an attempt."

"Sounds good," Lee handed Jo a beer. "Hit us, Peanut."

"Ok, this takes place in 1924 in Chicago. One morning a factory worker walked home from work along the canal close to Wolf Lake. He sees a kid's foot in the water and calls the police. It was called the worst crime in Chicago's history. It takes a while to identify the dead kid but it's a boy called Bobby Franks."

"Bloated from the water?" Koz asked while he took his shot.

"No, but the killer had poured acid on the body. Since the boy was naked they assumed it was a pedophile and a sex crime, so they arrested his teacher."

"That it?"

"No. Bobby was from a semi-wealthy family and his mom'd had a call from someone saying her son had been kidnapped and she received a ransom note."

"But the boy was already dead?" Tig asked.

"Yup," Jo said with a smile. "She got the call before the body was found but the boy was already dead when she received those things. Which was a bit odd."

"Doesn't sound like the perfect fucking crime to me," Tig said and sat down next to Lee. "Why kill the kid if they want to try to get money for him?"

Jo pointed at Tig with a smile. "You're assuming the money was the reason. It wasn't. The cops found glasses with an unusual type of hinges and it turned out very few glasses of that type had been sold. One pair to a 19 year old guy named Nathan Leopold. He claimed he'd lost the glasses while bird watching."

"Fucking geek," Tig laughed. "Bird watching. Guessing that wasn't true? If he didn't mean birds as in babes."

"No it wasn't true. And Nathan's alibi for the night was Richard Loeb, coincidently Bobby Franks relative."

"Oohh, I'm sensing the stench here. Some rich kid being cut off by his dad and wants money so he kidnaps a relative and things go south," Bowie chuckled.

"No. But they were the killers."

"So why did they do it?" Lee asked. If this was a story she'd bothered to remember, it was something special.

"They were bored and wanted to commit the perfect crime."

Lee laughed. Hence the reason she picked this story for a 'Perfect Crime' story.

"Bored?" Lorca shook his head. "Fucking rich kids. Guessing things didn't turn out the way they planned."

Jo shook her head as well and leaned over the pool table since it was her turn. "When they picked up the boy, they were going to knock him unconscious, but ended up killing him instead."

"Fucking amateurs, they always fuck up on the basic things," Tig said and got up when Jo missed her shot. "Got all the details planned, but don't know how to knock someone out."

"True," Jo said with a smile and got down next to him. "The plan had been to take him out to the lake and strangle him together so they both were equally guilty. Instead they got a car full of blood and the pipe they were gonna put the kid in was too slim, that's why he ended up in the water."

"Jesus! Did they swing for it?" Lee liked Jo's crime stories, she always knew the full one so you could ask her stuff about it. His favorite was still about the two morons who were gonna steal President Lincoln's body and get a ransom for it.

"No, they were 18 and 19 so they were minors. Loeb was killed inside and Leopold served 33 years and moved to Puerto Rico after that. He wrote a book about it."

"Have you read it?"

"Yeah."

Lee nodded to Jo. She'd told him enormous amounts of crime stories. Early on he used to check to find out if they were true. Soon he stopped, he'd never caught her making this shit up. He knew why she knew all these kind of stories and shit, it was a way to keep talking while you hustled the shit outta someone. She could talk for hours about pretty much anything and it was never boring.

Last time he'd heard a story was on her birthday. She'd told them about Annie Oakley and her marriage to Francis Butler; that when Annie died he'd stopped eating and died just 18 days after her.

-o0o-

Lee watched Jo at the pool table with Bowie and Donut. She was laughing but something was off. He turned and saw Hap in a corner, with his black angry eyes on Jo. He wondered what the fuck was up with the two of them this time.

He sat down next to Koz.

"What the fuck is up now?"

Koz shook his head. "No idea, but I wish that fucking prick had at least made an effort on her 30th birthday." Then he looked at Jo, at the moment with her arm around Bowie. Nothing sexual, just an arm, but knowing Hap, it didn't take much to set him off if he was already pissed. Koz sighed. "This isn't good."

"No," Lee agreed. Jo wasn't in Hap's face but she wasn't holding back. "Know what it is this time?"

Not that anyone really had anything to do with what was going on between a brother and his Old Lady, but the way they rode, worked and basically lived together, you knew when things were off.

Hap and Jo had never fought in public, not fucking once. Fuck, when he thought about it, he hadn't even seen them make out in public. But no one missed when they were mid fight. Hap looked ready to kill and Jo, as opposed to any other time, didn't look at him. It was basically like being in Siberia to be around her.

"No, no idea what it is, but it's been going on for a long time," Koz answered his question. "I've asked her and this time even she told me to mind my own fucking business."

Lee turned and looked at him. "Think she knows about him nailing other chicks now and then?"

Most Old Ladies were aware of the 'what happens on a run, stays on a run' rule. Few of them liked it when it hit their face that their Old Man was using the rule; or when it ended up with them needing medication to get read of some interesting additions to their pussy. Other times they just got fed up with it. There were guys who had deals with their women and didn't do it. As far as he knew Hap wasn't one of those who pretended not to have the rule and then still fucked around. It would at least surprise him if he was, he might be stone cold, but he was honest.

"I know she knows that. Always has. That's not it." Koz emptied a glass. "No point in speculationg, could be fucking anything when it comes to the two of them. She might've moved his socks in the drawer or something." He turned and looked at Hap and Lee did the same. "That looks bad though."

"Go and have a talk to him. Tell him to not fucking ruin his Old Lady's birthday at least." It might not be any of his business, but he liked Jo, she was a good girl and she deserved some fun tonight.

"Yeah, and then I'll come walking back with my balls in my throat," Koz laughed, but he got up. "I'll try."

Lee walked over to Jo and put his arm around her. "All good, Peanut?"

"Yeah," she smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Thanks for this. Throwing me a party, it's really nice of you."

"Wasn't just me," Lee laughed and kissed her cheek. "But anything for our little gentlemen thief. Hope you're having a good time."

While they were talking he led her to the side and she followed.

"I am, thank you."

"What's going on there?" he asked with a nod towards Hap.

Jo laughed and gave his cheek a kiss. "Think it's PMS, just leave him alone." She snuck out of his grip and smiled. "It's nothing."

Fifteen minutes later Hap walked up to Jo, put his hand on her neck and led her out of the clubhouse. That was the last time he'd talked to her and obviously his gut instinct had been right. It was not nothing. At the same time, whatever it was, it was none of his fucking business.

-o0o-

The next time Happy woke up, Jo was sleeping next to him. She was on her belly, resting her head on her arms. The little bitch hadn't woken him up when she got back. He was going to get her for that so he moved over to lie on top of her. That did wake her up and when she tried to turn, he pinned her down.

"You didn't wake me up."

"I tried," she said and turned her head as much as possible. He noticed the smile on her lips and kissed her cheek. "Think you accidentally might've found a position that might work."

"Nothin' accidental about it, babe."

He pushed his hand between her and the bed. Resting on his elbow he lifted her ass up enough to be able to get his hand into her panties.

"That's, nice" she mumbled when he found her clit. he saw the smile on her lips. "Gonna pin me down and fuck me like this?"

"You bet." He licked her ear. "Should've woken me up if you wanted to be in control."

"Gonna make me cum?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Then I don't care," she moaned.

His knees were on each side of her legs and he pulled down her panties just far enough to leave her ass bare. She pushed her behind up higher and he ran his hand up between her thighs. He drove the side of his hand along her slit and felt how ready she was. She sure had missed his dick. It had never been hard to get her going, but this was fast even for her. Leaning over her again he kissed her neck and up to her ear. Before speaking, her pushed his legs together with hers in between them.

"Hands over your head, Jo."

With a smile she did as he asked and he grabbed both her wrists with one hand, holding them down. She arched her back to lift her behind even higher. He positioned his dick, put his hand on her hip, and slowly entered her. She moaned again. He stroked the hair out of her face while slowly moving in and out of her, holding her legs tight together between his knees. He wanted to see her face before leaning down, resting on one of her arms.

He kept the strokes deep and slow and soon her breathing became heavier so he reached underneath her to find her clit again. She was soaking wet and tried to push harder against him, forcing him to speed up.

"Hap," she finally said. "Please, fuck me."

He chuckled, "Patience, baby."

There was an irritated groan and he felt her squeeze around his dick and once again push towards him. It was just to tease him and he wasn't falling for it.

"Come on," she said. "Harder."

So he let go of her hands, grabbed her hips and moved back to yank her up on all fours.

"Now I'll teach you what happens when you don't wake me up like you promised."

She turned her head and looked at him over her shoulder with that crooked smile on her lips. Her eyes were sparkling. He smiled when he slammed into her. She shrieked so he did it again.

"I'll never wake you up again," she mumbled with her eyes closed. "I'll just fall asleep and hope you do this."

He laughed and shoved his dick inside her again, "Kinda hoped you'd say that."

He kept a relentless, hard tempo and she consistently got louder. When he felt her getting closer, he leaned over her again, wrapped his arm around her hips, holding her tight, and pulled her towards him with every thrust. His other arm was around her neck, holding her shoulder. He bit down on her ear. He fucking loved to feel her entire body against him like this. When he held her this tight he could feel the orgasm running through her.

"Come on, babe," he said and hugged her tighter, still fucking her roughly.

Her arms gave way, but he held her up. Her hands grabbed the arm around her neck. He groaned when he felt her nails dig into his lower arm but he didn't stop.

"Oh, my god," she mumbled and for a second her entire body relaxed before he felt the first wave of the orgasm hit her and he knew he wouldn't last long.

She felt so small in his arms and he'd missed fucking like this. His small girl, coming while he held her up and drove into her, feeling her cramping around his dick. He put his hand on her forehead, leaning her head back and kissed her neck, nibbled on it as he felt his own orgasm coming.

"Fuck, Jo!"

"Don't stop!" she almost yelled. "Not yet."

"Greedy bitch," he mumbled, but he managed to hold off for a few more seconds while she still squeezed around him, fucking milking him. When he felt her starting to relax again he let go and just focused on himself, thrusting hard until he finally released with a loud, "Fuck!"

Holding her tight he rolled down to his side and kissed her hair.

"Gonna punish me often?" Jo said and gave his arm a kiss.

"Every fucking chance I get."

She laughed and turned around. When he moved to his back, she nuzzled into the nook of his arm and put her hand on his chest.

"I want you in Tacoma." He saw the look on her face and shook his head to shut her up. "Hear me out."

"Okay," Jo sighed, "Are you offering me another deal?"

"Only way to get you anywhere." He'd figured it out before he fell asleep and he just hoped it'd be enough for her.

"So," she smiled, "whatta you got?"

"Mom isn't getting any better, so if you give me a year in Tacoma, I'll go Nomad and you can live wherever the hell you want. I'll stay Nomad for a while, looking after her, and then I'll land somewhere around here. To be close to mom."

"A year?"

"Yeah. Need a year up there to fix shit. Get the others used to the idea of voting me off."

"Think they wouldn't do that if you asked them now?"

"Probably would, but I owe them better than that." He fisted Jo's hair and gave her a kiss. She moved her leg over his and he felt her wet pussy rubbing agains his thigh. "Did you just rub spunk on my leg?"

"It's your spunk. And speaking of your spunk, should I be worried about fuck bugs? I know I once promised you that you wouldn't have to wear rubber as long as we were married. Just didn't see this situation coming."

"Don't have to worry." He hadn't fucked anyone without a rubber since Jo and this wasn't that different from when they lived together, considering he occasionally banged some sweetbutts back then. So far he hadn't caught anything. "How about that deal?"

Jo was quiet and he could see her brain working. She leaned forward to kiss him again. Even if it was just to keep him occupied and give her time, he didn't mind. Her tongue played around in his mouth for a while and finally he sucked on it and moved back.

"Did you know that the tongue is the strongest muscle in the body, if you take the size in consideration?"

"Really?" Like he gave a shit but she'd get to the point eventually.

"Only muscle that's not attached at both ends too," she continued with a smile and a matter of fact nod.

"Joanna," he said and fisted her hair again. "You're stalling."

"What do I get?"

"Well. You get to live wherever you want while I'm a Nomad. And we'll be in California once it's done."

"Where in Cali?"

"Charming if they'll have me."

She did a small grimace, "With Gemma."

"She'd behave. She wants me here and I think she likes you." He knew that was what some of her hassling Jo was about, she wanted info since she wanted him here. Clay had said he'd be welcome but he wanted to go Nomad for a while. That was a good way to earn quick cash and if his mom got worse, he'd need it. "Still stalling, baby."

"Not much of a deal for me. It's basically you telling me where we're gonna live. Even if it's Cali. And I can't surf in Charming."

"It's not far to some nice waves and loads of bigger cities around for you to hustle your way through."

That made her laugh and she moved up to lay on him. "Sounds like heaven, baby."

"Know how to keep my girl satisfied," he chuckled and hugged her. He'd known she wanted more, he just hadn't figured out what to offer her. "So what do you want as your part of the deal?"

She eyed him and he could see that there was something she had in mind, but she kept quiet.

"Just say it," he finally said.

"No other women." She couldn't look at him while she said it and hid her face in his chest. "I don't want to share you this time."

She'd never bothered him about that. The only time she asked him, he'd told her the truth and that was it. No complaining and no asking. He let go of her hair and held her chin instead.

"Okay." He really didn't mind. He'd been plowing through enough pussy the past five years to know there was no comparison anyway. And if she was around, he didn't need any other. He didn't want anyone else. If that's what it took, he'd agree. He looked at her. "Do we have a deal?"

"Yes. It's a deal. _One_ year, as in twelve months, but I'm gonna need a couple of months to move and all that shit."

"Two months, then I'll haul your ass up there, ready or not." He hugged her closer. "And it's twelve months from when you actually live there. Not from now."

"Would never try to trick you like that," Jo said with a laugh.

"Sure you would. I know you."

Jo put her hands on his cheeks, moved up so she was eye to eye with him and gave him a careful kiss. "I know you do." She stroked her nose against his and gave him a second kiss. "So as long as you keep it in your pants, I'll go wherever you want me to."

"I like the sound of that," he knew his smile was huge. "Say it again."

"So long as you keep it in your pants?" Should've known it wouldn't be that easy. He gave her a kiss. "I love you," she said instead.

"Like the sound of that too."

He pulled her down to his side and she turned around so he could warm her. Her feet snuck between his thighs and he kissed her hair. For the first time he felt completely calm. She'd agreed and that meant that she for sure wouldn't have him sign any fucking papers. She would be back with him now. He gave her a tight hug.


	16. In Inceptum Finis Est

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_I find that there are more and more people to thank every time. As usual, big thank you to you who reads this. And another one for all the reviews, favs and alerts. Finally also to **Simone Santos** (for support and help) and **MuckyShroom** (with patience enough to be my beta)_

_**A word of WARNING:** this chapter contains explicit violence. So now that you have been warned..._

* * *

**16. In Inceptum Finis Est**

_a. in the beginning is the end  
b. the beginning foreshadows the end_

-o0o-

Kozik laughed when Jo came out for breakfast the next day. She looked pissed and he knew what it was about.

"He woke you up?"

"Yes! Really fucking early. Sent me into the shower and when I got back out he was asleep again. So naturally I tried to wake him up, but he just said 'there's no fucking fire.'" She disappeared into the kitchen and came out with some coffee. "And now I can't go back to sleep."

She sat down and glared at Kozik when he kept laughing. "Can't believe you keep falling for that one."

"It's not funny."

Hap had done that more than once. Usually when they were at home because he knew she'd go out and buy them breakfast, so by the time he got up, he had it served; with a slightly pissed wife maybe, but since they never talked during breakfast anyway, he didn't care much.

"Yeah, it is. Can't figure out why he did it this time. He'd still get breakfast."

"To mess with me." She reached for one of the sandwiches and looked up when Gemma came over. "Morning."

"Morning." Gemma sat down at their table. "Are you sticking around for a couple of days?"

"Yeah. We're going to see his mom today, but we're coming back here after that."

Hap had mentioned that they were going to see his mom. He looked worried about it. He should be, Rosa would get the full story from Jo in no time and the she'd go for Hap like a missile. Kozik like Rosa, a lot, she was a real lady, just a really fucking scary lady.

"Good." Gemma gave Jo a smile. "Have you two figured out what to do 'All by yourself'?"

Kozik didn't miss those quotation marks towards the end and wondered what the hell that was about. He had a hunch. Jo had probably told Gem to mind her own business and he couldn't see that going over all that well.

"Yes." Jo looked at him. "I'm moving up to Tacoma in a while."

"Really?" Kozik couldn't help the smile. He was so fucking happy about that. "How did he get that to fly?" When she smiled, he laughed. "A deal?"

"Yeah. A deal."

Gemma didn't look all that satisfied though. "Thought you liked to surf. How the fuck are you going to do that in Tacoma?"

"I won't," Jo shrugged. "I'll figure something out."

That didn't sound like Jo. He had a feeling there was more to that 'deal' than she wanted to admit; meaning she wouldn't tell him, meaning it had something to do with Happy more than her. He assumed he'd find out sooner or later.

"You strike me as a typical Cali-girl though." Gemma lit a smoke. "Gotta hard time picturing you up in Washington."

"I used to live there," Jo pointed out with a smile. "For seven years."

"Shit hole and all dark. You'll get pale as a ghost up there." She eyed Jo. "You manage to look pretty colorless even here."

That's when Kozik really caught on to what the Queen was up to. She wanted Jo here because she wanted Hap here. Couldn't blame her, Hap was a good soldier and both Clay and Jax liked him. Hell, most of Redwood liked him. He was good to have around, but also easy to have around. He was one of those who didn't give a shit about politics and he was a loyal motherfucker.

Jo just smiled though. "I guess I'll have to come and visit often. To soak up the sun."

A smile spread on Gemma's lips as well. "I guess you will."

Kozik wanted to come back to Charming but there was no way in hell that'd happen as long as Tig had a vote in it. If Hap and Jo left to come here... and he had a sneaky feeling that that was what was going on, that 'the deal' was that Jo wouldn't be stuck up in Tacoma forever.

The next thought that went through his mind was whether he should talk to Lee about it. He probably should, but at the same time... it was just a suspicion; and Hap wouldn't do things in a dirty way, he'd tell them about it, and this thing with Jo was most likely just what pushed him to do it faster. There were most likely other reasons for why he wanted to move other than Jo. Hap was a Cali guy originally, it wasn't all that odd that he'd want to come back here.

He'd miss him though; and Jo. Kozik found himself wondering how he'd be able to convince Tig to vote him back in. Sure, there were other California clubs but this was his 'home' club. If he came back to California, this was where he wanted to land.

Hap came out about thirty minutes later and gave Jo a small smirk when she glared at him.

"Sucker," he mumbled to her when he leaned forward to grab one of the sandwiches.

"Are you taking the cage?" Koz asked while trying to contain his laughter at Jo's very angry face.

"No. Apparently my car is a pile of shit."

"Nothing 'apparently' about that. It _is_ a pile of shit," Kozik said and when Jo snapped her head towards him he shrugged. "Have you seen your own car?" When she didn't answer he turned to Hap. "You need a bitch seat if you're taking her on your bike."

"Yeah. Help me with that?"

"Sure. I'll talk to Clay, they probably have some seat for you to borrow."

It didn't take them long to fix his bike and then he watched Jo climb up behind Hap and they took off. He didn't miss the smile on Jo's face when she put her arms around Hap and he chuckled a bit when they took off.

-o0o-

Happy had missed Jo behind him on the bike and this trip was a decent distance to start with. If he hadn't had that fucking hip acting up. They stopped once, she pretended she needed it but he knew it was just her fussing about his wound. It was ok and he let it slide.

He drove up to the driveway at his mom's house and smiled when he saw the door open, she knew it was him. His smile got even wider when her jaw drop as she noticed Jo. She held out her arms and it wasn't to him.

"Pajarito!" she yelled. "Let me have a look at you."

His mom, Rose, always said that Jo reminded her of a little bird, hence the nickname. He liked it. It wasn't just about her size, it was in combination with how much she ate.

Jo laughed and walked up to his mom, giving her a long hug. "It's good to see you, mama."

When his mom leaned back he saw that the woman had tears in her eyes and he went over to give her a hug too.

"Hi, mom," he said and kissed her cheek. "You ok?"

"No!" She hit his arm. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack, boy!"

"Thought you'd be pleased. Not freak out."

Rosa looked at Jo with a warm smile. "I'm very pleased." Then he saw it, that look in her eyes. She took a closer look at Jo, then glared at him. She'd noticed and he was in so much trouble. "Let's go inside. Are you hungry?"

"I can eat," he said and put an arm around his mom. "And you know she'll eat no matter what."

She took the two of them inside to the kitchen and started to put food on the table. Jo basically filled her in on what she'd been up to lately, it was very casual. They ate, all still very casual but Happy was just waiting for the ax to fall over his neck. There was no fucking getting out of this.

There weren't that many people he was afraid of, or even gave a shit about what they thought about him. His mom was one of them. That woman could scare the shit outta him with looks alone and he was getting those looks now.

When his mom'd served coffee, refusing any offer of help, she sat down next to Jo. She put her hand on her cheek and ran her thumb over Jo's nose and the bump on the bridge of it. Hap swallowed down the coffee that was on it's way up again.

"My stupid son did this. Didn't he?"

Jo looked down at the table and shook her head. "It's complicated."

His mom laughed dryly. "When a man hits a woman it's never because of complications," she looked straight at him now. "It's because of stupidity and cowardice."

Happy didn't know what to say, he ran his hand over his head, looking between his mom and Jo. Jo was still looking down at her hands and his mom turned to him, giving him one of the worst look he'd ever had from her.

"Happy, go and have a smoke, buy some milk or something," she finally said. "Leave us for a while."

Happy nodded and looked at Jo. She wasn't looking at him. When he passed her he put his hand on her shoulder, leaned over and kissed her hair.

"Tell her. All of it."

Jo looked up at him and nodded.

He walked outside and sat down on the porch to light a smoke. It would be easier for Jo if he wasn't there and frankly; he didn't want to hear it. He remembered it all too well.

-o0o-

Happy was pissed beyond words. And drunk. He'd been drunk a lot lately, simply since he wasn't sure how to deal with Jo. They'd talked about it, after all, she hadn't been pregnant, and he didn't want kids, but she'd been so fucking casual about killing it off. Like it was nothing! Their kid was something you 'took care' of. Like he 'took care' of scumbags and rats, she was going to 'take care' of what could be their kids.

He couldn't even make sense to himself since, again, he didn't want kids anymore than she did. But still...

And then she wouldn't fucking talk about it anymore. He'd tried to bring it up again but she'd just dodged the questions the way she always fucking did when it was something she wasn't comfortable with talking about. He hated that! He hated when she was a coward and tried to avoid shit.

To pour gasoline on the fire she was ignoring him too because she knew he wasn't finished. The entire birthday party she'd been a fucking angel with every single fucking one of his brothers. All dressed up in some 'fuck me'-dress, his ink fully visible and she still pranced around, hugging and giving cheek kisses. All while completely ignoring him.

He watched her cuddle with Koz, play pool and hug Bowie and Donut, before finally being dragged away to the side by Lee for what looked like a very intimate talk. Lee held his arm around her, smiled and looked all fucking concerned and she fucking kissed him too!

He threw down some more drinks and a beer before deciding he'd had enough and got up to take his woman home. She didn't protest and they walked out. The second they were out of the clubhouse, her shoulders fell and she stepped away from his hand. That move made him even more angry. When they were by the bike she finelly looked at him.

"Sure you're ok to drive?"

Happy felt like exploding all over her then and there, but instead he clenched his jaws. "Just get on the fucking bike, Jo."

"I have a dress. I'll get cold."

"Bike. Now."

It wasn't a cold night or a long ride but when they got home she was shivering. They walked inside the apartment, but when she tried to continue to the bedroom, he stopped her.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"I need clothes. I'm fucking freezing to death," she said and spoke as if he was an idiot.

"No. I mean you, ignoring me, all fucking night."

"You were glaring from a corner, the entire time, and it was my birthday party. I wanted to have some fun." She was obviously pissed as well. "I don't know what's been off with you lately."

"You fucking idiot! You wanna know what's been off with me lately?" he growled.

"Yes! I do!"

It went downhill from there, fast. They got louder and louder, screaming accusations at each other. It ended with him yelling about her killing babies and her yelling about him being in no fucking position to have any say about what she did to her body. That was when he snapped.

"That's why you've been rubbing up on all my brothers in your 'fuck me' dress all fucking night? Because you think you can decide what to do with that pussy?" His voice managed to reach previously unheard of levels when he screamed; "That's _my_ fucking pussy!"

Jo took a deep breath, then slapped him over his cheek with a loud snap and a "Fuck you!"

The stupid cunt bitch slapped him and he saw red. His entire body went on auto pilot. He raised his clenched fist and, without even hesitating, hit her over the nose. He registered the crack and her scream, but it wasn't an angry scream anymore.

Folding over, she held her face and broken nose. He grabbed her, dragged her over the floor and pushed her up against the wall. Not even the blood, flowing down, over her face and slowly reaching her chest, stopped him.

Instead he grabbed her neck, pinned her against the wall and with his other hand he reached for her panties.

"You fucking bitch, think you can just slap me and get away with it?" he growled straight into her face.

"No!" She tried to fight off his hand underneath her dress. Her eyes were radiating terror, but he didn't care. "Please. I'm sorry!"

"You're gonna be really fucking sorry when I show you that this is _my_ fucking pussy and I'll do whatever the hell I want with it." He ripped off her underwear and started to unbuckle his belt. "That's what that fucking ink means. You're _mine_!"

She was hyperventilating now. Somewhere in the back of his head he knew that this was so fucked up, but he was too drunk, too angry and too much on autopilot to listen to that voice. He did notice the panic in her eyes and some sick and fucked up part of him liked it, even the tears running from her fear filled eyes. He smiled.

When he reached down to hoist up her leg and moved closer she closed her eyes and cried out; a panicked scream that eventually turned into words.

"No, Larry, please! No!"

It was like having a bucket of ice water thrown over him and he froze. Larry. He knew who that was. He was her last foster dad, the one she ran away from. Even if he'd had suspicions, he'd never known for sure why she left. Now he did. He let go of her and took a step back. Jo slid down the wall, crying and shaking and for the first time he really _saw_ it. The blood, the tears and her entire small, lithe body shaking.

"Jo," he reached, but when his hand touched her, she dodged him in fear. "Fuck. Jo, please."

He knew he was screwed. In less than five minutes he'd torn down what had taken him years to build up. There were no fucking words in the world that would fix this. He squatted down in front of her, ran his hand over his head and, for the first time since he could remember, he felt like crying.

"Baby, I'm sorry. Please." Her face was still hidden in her hands. "I won't hurt you again, just let me have a look at the nose. I'll take you to the hospital."

She still wasn't talking but he could see from her shaking body that she was still crying. He felt sick.

That's when the doorbell rang and he cursed. There was no fucking way he'd answer that door.

"Peanut, please. You can have a go at me, shoot me or whatever later, but let me see your face."

Three hard knocks, followed by the words, "Police, open the door," made him realize just how screwed he was. He knew what this would look like.

And that's when it hit him. It would look like the exact thing it was. He'd beaten up and almost raped his own wife. His girl. The woman he'd sworn to protect. He took a last look at Jo, and swallowed.

"I know it sounds like shit right now but I do love you, Jo, and I'm sorry," he said before he stood up and buckled up his jeans. In the hallway he threw his cut along with the gun into the closet before opening the door for the cops.

Two big pigs were standing outside when he opened. They'd probably sent the biggest guys they had when they connected his name to the address.

"Sir, do you have a gun on you?" one of them said as they stepped inside. They didn't even bother to explain why they were there.

"No," he answered and that was the only thing he'd tell them.

"We got a call about a disturbance. Are you alone?"

He clenched his jaw and nodded towards the living room. The one further inside held up a hand towards him.

"Sir, please stay where you are."

He stood still and closed his eyes when he heard the cop call for an ambulance into his walky talky. The rest was a haze, he was arrested for domestic disturbance but was informed that the charges might change. He could've told them that no matter what he'd done, Jo wouldn't tell them shit, but he kept his mouth shut.

With more force than necessary the other guy pushed him against the wall and put the hand cuffs on him. Normally it would piss him off, but at the moment all he could think about how fucked he was, what he'd done, and that Jo was all alone, with cops and she hated cops. She had no one.

In the car he overheard them saying she'd be taken to Tacoma General Hospital and the Sexual Assault Center and he felt even more sick. They asked him some questions, but he didn't reply, just looked out the window and tried to figure out how the fuck he could help her.

At the police station they booked him. He was just counting the seconds to get into the fucking cell, hoping this wasn't one of the punk ass places that turned off the phone during night; or that they would make it difficult for him once they figured out who he was. He was lucky, it was Saturday night and the place was slammed. They had enough problems with rowdy drunks and hookers giving them hell. He slipped through since he kept quiet and did what they asked.

He picked up the phone and dialed the number. Koz would accept the collect call without hesitation. There was only one reason you'd get one of those in the middle of the night.

"_Yeah?" _Kozik sounded like he'd just woken up.

"It's me. Jo's at Tacoma General." He wasn't sure how to say the next part. "At the Sexual Assault Center."

There was a silence and then the deep breath. _"Jesus fucking Christ, what did you do?"_

"I fucked up. She needs you," he said and closed his eyes leaning his head on the phone. "She won't say shit to the cops, I know that, but she needs someone there with her."

"_Fucking hell, Hap!"_

"Just get to her and have someone bail me out."

"_I'll take care of it." _He was quiet. _"You dumb fuck."_

"I know," he said and hung up.

At least she wouldn't be alone. She wouldn't have talked to the cops anyway, but she needed someone. And that someone wasn't him anymore.


	17. Hic at Nunc

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_I think you all took the last chapter better than expected. Thank you for all the reviews and a special thank you to the guest reviews._

_The entire idea for this story came from when I saw on Hap's rap sheet that he'd been arrested (not charged) for domestic disturbance. Anyway, I hope I can restore some of your faith in Happy in the following chapters. It will only be one more, plus an epilogue, after this one._

_As always, a big thank you to __**Simone Santos **__and __**MuckyShroom.**__ I love you two. And a shout out to the freak circle. You guys really make my nights (and days) in front of the computer so much more fun!_

* * *

**17. Hic at Nunc**

_here and now_

-o0o-

Joanna was holding Rosa's hand. Rosa was the closest thing she'd ever had to a real mom. The first time Hap had brought her here, Rosa had looked her over and then turned to Hap.

"Guess even you caught up on the fact that tit-size doesn't make a woman."

Joanna had reacted by laughing out loud before turning to Hap and smiling. "Really? You've introduced some of the bottle blonds to your mom?"

"More than one," she said and showed her into the kitchens. "Now, you skinny from starving yourself or do you eat?"

"She eats," Hap'd said with a laugh. "A lot."

"I think we'll get along," Rosa said with a smile and put her arm around Jo.

It had taken a few more visits before she was fully approved, but not that many. Rosa was the only one who saw Hap cuddle her, that was more because he knew his mom loved it. Sometimes, when Hap was away, she went down to see her alone. It was like being spoiled by a mom to be there and that was something she badly needed.

After leaving Hap she thought about going to see her, but it felt a bit wrong. Hap was her son and that was it.

Now Rosa had tears in her eyes and she patted the hand Jo had over hers with her free one before drying her cheeks.

"Idiota," she mumbled.

Rosa was half Mexican, grew up in the US, but still used Spanish words, especially curses and terms of endearment. Joanna loved the name she'd given her, 'birdie'. According to Rosa, only birds were that small and ate that much.

"Don't be too hard on him."

"Too late. Ripped him a new one when he said you'd left."

Joanna laughed. "I bet."

"And now? You back with him?"

"Yes. I'm back with him."

"Why?"

"He was persistent," she answered and laughed.

"You trust him to not hurt you again?"

The question surprised Joanna. This was his mom after all: but again, this was his mom after all. The woman knew him better than most. She squeezed her hand.

"For some reason I do. I might be stupid." She'd avoided those thoughts.

"Love makes people stupid. It wasn't your fault," Rosa continued relentlessly. "Don't ever let him make you think that. You didn't do anything wrong."

"I know that."

"Has he said that?"

"He was angry that I stayed away."

"Idiota," she mumbled again. "He should be glad. You've been away for long enough to get over it. Seen him any earlier, you would've told him to go fuck himself."

Joanna laughed again. She really loved this woman. "Probably."

"The mother part of me is glad he's got you back. He needs you." She shook her head. "The other part wants to beat him senseless."

Finally she moved over and put her arms around Rosa. "You're probably the only one who'd get away with that."

"He was a mess," she said. "I'm not defending him, but he was a mess for a long time. I wouldn't let him come here, I threw him out when he came and said you were gone, but Kozik told me. Called and told me how my boy was doing. Wasn't good."

"I know. I didn't know Kozik told you but I knew he was a mess."

Rosa leaned back and looked at her. Stroking Joanna's cheek she smiled. "How did he really persuade you?"

"He made a real effort," Joanna smiled. "After being an ass for a while."

"It's that stupid man pride. They have to swing their dick around before admitting they were wrong."

"I did some of that too, so it wasn't just him. We made a deal and then I got sick. He grabbed the opportunity."

Rosa knew what Jo was like when she was sick so she laughed. Then she started coughing. Bad. She held her chest and coughed, gasping for air. Joanna was about to go and get Happy when she finally managed to say "Water."

It took her some time before she managed to calm down. "Smoking," Rosa mumbled and took a few more sips of water. "Wrecked my lungs."

"He said you were ill."

"I'm dying, honey. It's gonna take a while but I'll drown from the inside sooner or later." She took some deep breaths and some more water. "Pulmonary edema, it's the smoking and some shit with the heart."

"I'm sorry," Joanna said.

Rosa waved with her hand. "I've had a good life." Then she smiled. "Most of the time. He's been a handful."

"I bet."

The door opened and Hap cautiously came inside. "Hey."

"Hey," Joanna said and smiled. "She said she'd go easy on you since she's already ripped you a new one."

He smiled back. "Yes, she did." He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "You ok?"

"Deserved it! You're an idiot." Rosa said, ignoring his question, and drank some more water. "I need to rest and you should probably head back."

Joanna nodded and got up. When Rosa stood up, she gave her a hug. "I'll be back soon. I'm staying here in California for a while, so if you're up for it, I'll come over one weekend."

"I'm up for it." She turned to Hap and hugged him as well before putting her hands on his cheeks. "You just got a second chance, that you didn't deserve, with a good woman. A woman who's okay with all those bad things you are." Hap opened his mouth to protest, but she put her hand over his mouth. "You're my son and I love you, but you can't deny there's bad things in you; but she knows and she accepts them and that stupid club. Don't be a fucking moron and ruin it again."

"I won't," he said once she took her hand from his mouth.

"Because I'd die a little lighter at heart if I know you have her." Hap only nodded and Rosa grabbed his cheek. "If you ever hurt her again, I will shoot you." Hap only nodded and took a step back when Rosa turned to her. "Take care of my boy."

"I will." She smiled at Hap, "As much as he lets me."

"He's a bit dense, but he loves you."

Jo laughed. "I know, I'm a bit dense too sometimes, you know."

"No you're not. Maybe going back was a bit dense though. Still don't think he deserved that." She glared at Hap before grabbing Jo's shoulders. "Take care of yourself and call me."

Jo kissed her cheek. "I will. I'll come back soon."

"You better." Rose pointed at Hap. "Leave that idiota at home next time so we can have a proper talk about his brain being missing."

"Like I said, I'll be here in California for a while, so I'll come by."

Hap gave Rosa a hug. "Love you, ma."

"Love you too. Now let a woman rest. It's been a lot this day," she said as she pushed them out the door.

Joanna stood by the bike and looked at Hap, he seemed a million miles away. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"She's never hit me, never had to. That woman can make me feel like shit without opening her mouth," he mumbled and handed her a helmet. "And when she does open her mouth; I want to shoot myself."

"It's the mom-thing."

"Yeah, that too. I love the shit outta her but she's also a lioness," he sighed. He stopped and looked at her in silence for a while. "I..." he searched for the words. "I'm sorry."

"I know," Joanna said and looked at him, but he didn't seem able to meet her eyes. "I know you are."

"Just..." He shrugged. "Sitting out here I thought about it and... I can't... Fuck. What I did... I haven't thought about it like that, just wanted you back. I'm..."

Joanna laughed when he turned quiet after that very stuttering speech. "Words are good sometimes, aren't they?"

He snapped his head towards her with big eyes, and then he smiled, but it was a sad smile. "Yeah. Just not sure there are any for this."

"Sure there are," she put her arms around his waist, "But you're a bit dense."

"I'm not. You're never nice when we've been to my mom's." He put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a kiss. "So what would you say, if you were me?"

"Oh, no. You're not getting away that easy." She nodded towards the bike. "Start this thing up. You have the entire trip back to think about it."

-o0o-

He saw them coming back since he was outside with Lorca. Kozik threw down his smoke and walked over to them.

"How was she?" He asked them when they got off the bike.

"Fine," It was Jo answering. "She didn't ask about you. What did you do? Kill another one of her tulips?"

Rosa had a thing for tulips. He'd once accidentally stepped on one of them and she'd gone ballistic. He'd have been better off killing one of her fishes.

"Nah," he laughed. "Think she was overwhelmed from seeing her Birdie again. She still loves me."

Hap looked tired and stretched. "What's been going on?"

"Not much, all calm. We'll know more tomorrow."

"Good. I need a rest."

The stubborn idiot probably shouldn't have been riding that far, not that he'd admit that in a million years. He also had a hunch that there'd been some serious talking going on there. He knew there was no fucking way to hide anything from that crazy woman. She'd want to know all of it.

Jo stood next to him and watched Hap go inside.

"So... how did it really go?"

"Okay." Jo sat down and he got down next to her. "I told her."

"How did she take it?"

"Fine. She's not stupid, she probably had a hunch about what had happened."

"No, she's not stupid and she knows her son." He handed Jo his smokes and she took one.

Jo sat in silence for a while. "What did he say? When you came back."

Kozik shook his head. "You know him. Didn't say much. Never did." He watched her nod. "He knew he fucked up and that there wasn't much to say about it."

"Yeah."

"He was a wreck. A month later he disappeared for a while and when he came back... he was better. Still a mess but at least..."

Kozik had no idea where Hap had gone and he'd never asked him. When he came back he seemed more resolved, but he was still... there was no fucking stopping him. He was on edge the entire time, never reckless, just in a constant state of ready. He hadn't been completely relaxed until a few days ago. Koz looked up at Jo.

"He'll do whatever you want, anything, to get you back and he'd rather slit his throat than do something to hurt you."

"That was probably true even before he did it. He snapped."

"I know. I also know he hasn't gotten drunk since he came back from wherever he went. Not once." Jo looked at him questioningly. "He drinks, but he doesn't get drunk. I think we both know why."

"He hasn't told me that."

"Honestly, I'm not sure he even thinks about it anymore. He just doesn't do it."

Since he still took a beer or a drink, it wasn't something people really noticed. Kozik did, but that was more because he knew why. Hap didn't want to lose his control. He wasn't surprised that Hap hadn't mentioned it to Jo. He'd never blame being drunk for being the reason he hit her. He knew he'd fucked up, the circumstances surrounding that were just details to him. He took Joanna's hand.

"You know, It was Rosa who told him to not sign the papers," he said with a laugh and Joanna laughed as well.

"Should've known she had a hand in that."

"Yup. Said that no matter what he did, the two of you loved each other and if he just got you to face him, he'd win you over."

"Bitch!" she said but she was still laughing. "I'm gonna have a talk to her about that."

"Not like she'd be the least bit ashamed of it. You know her. She'll be proud about being right."

Now Jo was laughing so hard, tears were running down her cheeks. "She would, wouldn't she?" She managed to calm down and dried her cheeks. "Guess we know that he didn't get his stubbornness from his dad at least." Then she lost it again and so did he.

"No. He's got a lot from her."

"The killer look! That's from her!"

They couldn't stop laughing and Jo leaned forward, holding her stomach and Kozik's eyes blurred from the tears.

"Oh my god, he'd kill us if he heard this."

Through his tear filled eyes her face look distorted and he remember when he'd gone to the hospital to see her.

-o0o-

Slamming the phone on the hook he got up and pushed at the sweetbutt next to him.

"Get up, you need to get out."

"Okay," she mumbled and by the time he came back from the bathroom she was dressed and on her way.

He was still fuming while riding towards Tacoma General Hospital, but he wasn't sure how to get to Jo. He wondered what the fuck Hap had done. If anyone had asked him less than twelve hours ago he would've bet his left nut on Hap not ever hurting Jo. Obviously he'd been wrong.

As he walked into the hospital he realized that this wasn't going to be as easy as just strolling in and asking for Jo. She was probably protected if they considered her the victim of a crime. He found one of their locker rooms, broke into one, and grabbed a doctor's robe and a badge. As long as no one took a closer look he'd be ok.

Finding the Sexual Assault Center was another fucking problem. He couldn't very well ask for directions if he wanted to blend in, but he finally managed.

He heard two officers talking to a doctor about her before he mananged to find her.

"And?" One of the cops said.

"She says she fell against the table, that she was drunk. Her blood alcohol level is pretty high."

"Then why didn't the husband protest when we took her in?"

"According to her, he probably thought you wouldn't believe him anyway."

"And rape. Her panties were ripped off her, lying on the floor."

"She claims she wasn't raped, but she won't let me examine her."

Kozik took a deep breath. Rape. That fucking asshole.

"I saw scratch marks on the inside of her thigh!" The cop again, and Kozik got even more pissed.

"Listen, I can't force her to allow an examination." There was a deep sigh. "I see this all the time. She won't help you. She doesn't want counseling, she won't talk, I might as well let her go. I'll leave her with a number she can call."

"Are you insane? Leave her a number."

"This isn't how you'll catch this guy," the doctor said. "Sorry guys. You need to find something else on him."

They obviously knew who Hap was and had hoped to get him like this; but he'd heard enough. They'd set her loose, so he decided to wait for her outside the center. She came walking, alone and when she looked up his heart stopped. Her nose had been broken, no question about it. He wanted to beat the shit out of, and possibly shoot, Hap for this.

"You didn't have to come. I didn't say anything."

"Baby, you think that's why I'm here?"

She stood still. "Then why are you here?"

"He said you needed someone, and at the moment, I'm your friend, no club, nothing."

Jo nodded but stood quiet.

"Want a hug?"

Her face crumbled and she sobbed, but nodded. He went up to her and put his arms around her, hugging tight. They stood there for a long time and when she finally calmed down he kissed her forehead.

He took her home in a cab and put her to bed before cleaning up the blood, swearing about his 'friend'. When he went back into the bedroom she turned and looked at him and patted the edge of the bed, so he sat down.

"Should get some sleep, baby."

"Will you be here?"

"I'll be here. Get some sleep."

She reached out her hand and drew her fingertips over the tattoo he had on his neck.

"Who was she? Jen."

Jo had never asked him that. He took the hand from his neck since it was tickling him. "My sister. She died of leukemia when I was seventeen."

"Is that why you're like this with me? I'm your substitute sister?" she asked with a smile.

"Maybe." He looked at her. "Do you need anything? Painkillers."

"Nose is ok," she said. "Thanks."

"And the rest?"

"The rest?" She looked confused. "It's just the nose. Just one hit."

Kozik swallowed, he really didn't want to fucking do this. "I mean... if he forced you. If that hurts."

She shook her head. "He didn't rape me, Koz."

"The cops..." he pointed towards the living room. "Your panties were in pieces on the floor."

"He stopped. He didn't do it."

"Okay." He leaned over and gave her cheek a kiss. "Get some sleep."

Four hours later he heard the key in the door and he went to meet Hap in the hallway. When he saw Kozik he halted.

"I'm just here for the gun and my cut. I'm going to the clubhouse." He looked around. "She here?"

"Sleeping," he answered.

When Hap started to walk inside the apartment he wondered if he should stop him, but instead he followed him inside. He stood in the door to the bedroom for a long time. Just looking at Jo sleeping. Then he turned around.

"Take care of her."

Kozik sighed. "I don't know what it is you want me to do."

"Whatever she asks you. Just do it." He grabbed some clothes from a pile of clean laundry on the floor. Without another word he left the apartment.

He managed to fall asleep on the couch and when he woke up the next morning, Jo handed him a cup of coffee.

"I'm taking off."

"I figured." He wished he could find something to say to stop her, but he couldn't think of a single thing. "I'll deal with him."

"I'll let you know where I am."

"Thank you."

He watched her pack a backpack and a duffel bag. She emptied the safe and he gave her what money he had on him.

"Let me know if you need more. If you need anything, Peanut." He put his arms around her again. "Anything, you hear me? You call me."

"Okay," she nodded against his chest.

"And I won't tell him shit. You can trust me on that."

As far as Kozik was concerned, the 'what goes on between a brother and his Old Lady' rule did not apply here. Hap had told him to take care of her and this was the best thing he could think of. It was up to her to tell him if she wanted Hap to know anything.

"I'll call us a couple of cabs."

Five minutes later, he gave Jo a final kiss and watched her leave in one of the cabs. He took the other cab to the hospital and his bike. He found Hap in his dorm at the clubhouse.

"I watched my friend pack up her shit and take off, since you apparently thought it would be the perfect fucking birthday gift to beat the shit outta her and almost rape her."

Hap closed his eyes and ran his hand over his head. "Okay."

"What the fuck happened?"

"I snapped," he said and shook his head. "We fought and I snapped."

"You snapped? That's your explanation?" Koz couldn't fucking believe this. "You're fucking unbelievable."

"What the fuck do you want me to say. Think I've been planning this? That I've just been waiting for a fucking excuse to break her nose?"

"It's not like it's the first fucking time you've fought. You've done it before? Just in more hidden areas on her?"

"No!" Hap yelled. "Fuck no, I've never hurt her. She's... I wouldn't do that."

"You just did."

"I know." Hap sat down on the bed.

"Probably just as well that she took off. What would stop you from beating the shit outta her next time you get drunk? Next time you might be just sober enough to get it up too. Finish the job."

He couldn't look at him at that moment. Mainly since if he kept looking at that fuck, he'd start feeling sorry for him. When he walked out, Hap yelled after him.

"Thanks, for being there for her."

He didn't turn around. "Don't think for a second that I did that for you."


	18. Ab Inconvenienti

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_Thank you to all of you for all your encouragement. There's only the epilogue left after this chapter and it should be up pretty soon._

_Thank you to __**MuckyShroom**__ for beta reading this chapter super fast after I'd sent her the wrong chapter at first._

_Another thank you to __**Simone Santos**__ for helping me all the time. And finally to the __**freak circle**__ for helping me feel sort of 'normal' this insane weekend. Love you all!_

* * *

**18. Ab Inconvenienti**

_a. from an inconvenient thing  
b. based on unsuitability  
c. from hardship_

-o0o-

Happy was still awake when Jo came into the room about half an hour later. She sat down on the bed next to him and was holding a glass of water.

"Guessed you wanted some pills."

"Yeah." He took them from her and swallowed them down before taking the water. "Thanks."

"My pile of shit cage isn't looking all that bad now, is it?"

"It still looks like a pile of shit," he laughed and pulled her down onto the bed next to him. "And I'm not getting into it, ever."

She circled her arms around him and drilled her nose into his chest. "So, thought of any words for me?"

"Not really." He was really shit with words like that, but he was gonna give it a try. "I'm sorry and it won't ever happen again."

"That's good words."

"I love you." He knew she liked to hear that. He didn't tell her often enough, but he sure as shit did love her to bits. His crazy ass wife.

"Even better."

"I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you." Now he just felt ridiculous. He felt a bit better when she gave him a big teasing smile.

"Oh, you silver tongue you! You're getting very good at this."

He laughed. "I can use my silver tongue in much better ways than talking, baby."

"I know. Think we'll stick to that one or I'll go all mushy on you for your sweet talking."

"Can't have that. I want my bitch wife." He gave her a kiss. "I'll come with you when you go back to San Fran. For a couple of days." He noticed her smug smile. "Not in the cage! But I think I deserve a couple of days off, so I'll spend those with you, to make sure you start packing up your shit."

There was a banging on the door and Koz opened it while holding his eyes.

"You decent?"

"Never!" Jo said, "But we're dressed."

"Church," he said. "Got some news."

Happy nodded, got up and gave Jo's cheek a stroke. "Don't run off."

"I'll never hear the end of that, will I?"

"Sure. In a couple of years or so," he said and Koz laughed.

He sat down at the back of the Chapel on one of the temporary chairs. It was just Redwood and Tacoma left.

"So," Jax said with a big smile. "Had a talk to Unser and surprisingly enough, Darby was flagged down with a broken tail light in Lodi and they found his stash in the back of the truck."

They all laughed. Jax had noticed the broken tail light and that Darby didn't seem to be in a hurry to fix it. Them blowing up his meth lab meant he needed more shit, and Unser had hinted the Sheriff in Lodi that Darby might be up to no good and had a broken tail light. He'd be gone for a while.

"I think we've just slammed and dunked this little war, all in our favor," Clay said with a smile and lit his cigar. "Big lab gone, we can handle the small ones by ourselves, and big boss on his way inside."

The smile spread like forrest fire and soon they all laughed. There was some small shit to go through and then they were done. Walking outside he caught Lee.

"Was thinking I'd take a few days with Jo."

"Take a few weeks. I'll call you if we need you."

"Sure?"

"I'm sure," Lee looked at his hip. "It's gonna take some time to heal and you back with Jo means it'll take even longer. I'm guessing you two aren't taking it easy. Take a while, you've done a good job Hap."

"Thanks."

Jo was out in the bar with Gemma. He watched Tig go up to her, saying something and pointing at the pool table. Probably asking for a last game since they were all leaving the day after. He got down on a couch to watch and this time she did it; smiled at him and now and then bumped him with the cue.

There was still shit to talk about, but all in all, it was good and as it should be. The only thing he wanted to tell her was that he'd found Larry.

-o0o-

Larry lived in a house in the suburbs outside of LA. Happy felt sick when he realized that the sick fuck still had foster kids, most of them girls in their early teens.

He'd asked Bowie to track him down, without any further explanations, and then spent days watching him. It was both to watch him and to sort out for himself what he was doing. This wasn't just about torturing and killing a guy because he deserved it. This was about Jo as well.

Three weeks into his drinking spree after Jo left, he'd found himself on his bike on a high way, piss drunk and not even remembering why the fuck he was there and if he was supposed to be going somewhere. He stopped the bike at the side of the road and checked his phone for any clues before going home to sleep it off.

As far as he could tell, he hadn't been on his way for some club business, since no one had asked him about it in the coming days; but he knew he'd lost control again and he was not the kind of man who should lose control, ever. He needed to keep his shit contained until he chose to let that stuff out.

He still wanted to make it up to Jo for what he'd done and he had decided that killing Larry was a good way. She'd probably never know, but it would be a way for him to let go of that fucking guilt. He didn't do guilt, it was in no way healthy for him to walk around feeling that. If he ever met her again, he'd still feel bad about what he'd done, without a doubt, but at least he'd be able to deal with it on his own if he got rid of that fucker.

The girls living with Larry were all pretty and all looked like the world was resting on their shoulders. Happy felt even better about his decision. Not all girls had Jo's guts to run off and trust they'd make it on their own and this gave them a chance to at least end up at a better place than Larry's.

He caught Larry while he was taking the dog out for a jog, probably to up his old man ass's stamina so he could rape those little girls properly. He let the dog go though, he wasn't into killing animals.

He'd found an empty cottage out in the middle of nowhere and that where he brought Larry while he was still passed out.

By the time Larry woke up again he was hanging from the ceiling with his mouth taped up. Happy wasn't even remotely interested in what Larry might have to say. Happy sharpened his knife with slow calculated movements, not looking back at Larry, but he could hear him waking up, trying to get loose.

He'd tried to get Jo interested in movies by making her watch them and she had a funny way of picking which ones to see. She never bothered reading what they were about, just picked one based on if she liked the title. So they'd seen 'Dog Day Afternoon", "Attack of the 50 ft Woman", "Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels", "Dead Man Walking" and, the one he was thinking about at the moment, "Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead."

In that last one, some guys messed up a job for a mob boss and the guy told them they had one more week to live. If they stuck around in Denver, they'd get a quick death. If they tried to run they'd get a buckwheat. 'Buckwheat' in this case was slang for what would be a long and painful death. One guy in the movie tried to run, they shot him up his ass and left him to bleed out in a dumpster.

That term had stuck with him. Buckwheat. He liked it. Larry was going to get a Buckwheat.

He finally turned around and looked at him. He wasn't at all interested in what Larry had to say, but he wanted the guy to know why he died and he wanted Larry to be really fucking scared before he even started on him.

"Have you ever killed anyone?" He said and Larry shook his head with pleading eyes. "Unless you take them by surprise with a bullet in the back of their head or in a fire fight; they all cry, scream and plead eventually. All of them." He stopped in front of Larry, still looking at him. "Quite often they cry out for their mother. I can respect that, I like my ma'. The begging... don't like that, don't have any respect for that. If I'm about to kill them, I've made up my mind, not like I'd feel sorry for a piece of shit."

He stood up, took off his cut and walked over to the pile of stuff he had on the floor.

"My wife used to tell me I don't talk much. I don't, she's the same. I guess we both know that if you keep that mouth running you never know what the fuck'll pop out. In this case..." he turned around and looked at Larry again, "It doesn't matter much, you won't tell anyone."

He walked over to Larry, who was starting to get very pale. "You know her, my wife." He pulled the tape off his mouth.

"Please..." Larry immediately said.

"Larry, remember what I said about begging?" Larry kept quiet and nodded. "Joanna Boswell, remember her?" Larry shook his head. "I guess all that underage pussy makes them blend together. She's small, black hair, big nose and a crooked mouth. You raped her and she ran away, about sixteen years ago."

He could see the moment it dawned on Larry who he was talking about and he leaned closer with a smile.

"She's my wife."

Larry stared at him in horror, "Please..."

"You're begging, Larry. Just answer my question; did you rape her?"

"Please... don't," Larry tried again and Happy slapped him.

"Focus on the question and just answer it."

"Yes, but just once."

Happy laughed. "I'm guessing she didn't give you a second chance. She's not big on second chances."

"Please, I'll do anything you want."

"Good." Happy took a new piece of tape, put it over Larry's mouth and patted his cheeks. "I want you to die, Larry. Slow and painful." He held up a big knife. "Joanna told me a story about the Quin Dynasty. She knew I had a thing for torture so she always told me these little stories about it."

He'd told her it was a bit sick that she did, knowing he'd probably use it and she'd said that he'd torture people no matter what she did and if he was gonna do something, he should fucking do it with style. He still thought it was a bit sick but he loved her for it just the same.

"They had an execution method called 'The Five Pains'. First, they cut of the nose," he pointed at Larry's nose with his knife, "Then a hand and a foot." He smiled when Larry tried to scream again, "followed by castration."

That caught Larry the Pederast's attention for real. Funny how all rapists got all choked up when it came to the dick. All guys obsessed about the dick, without a doubt, but it was as if rapists knew it was coming and were waiting for the full blown panic until it was actually mentioned.

He shrugged, "They usually ended it by cutting the person in half at the waist, but really; that's messy and a real hassle so I'll skip that one and I'll start with the nose, then the dick, before I start working on your hands and feet."

Bringing the knife up to Larry's nose, he noticed that he was about to faint. He slapped his cheeks a couple of times to make sure he didn't miss anything. Larry bled out somewhere around the time Happy cut off his hand, but he was fully conscious until then, he'd made sure of that.

Happy left the knife, the cover clothes and his shoes inside the cottage before burning it down.

-o0o-

They'd managed to find another position that worked, her in a reversed cowgirl with one leg between Hap's so she wasn't touching his wounded hip. Worked like a charm and it seemed to hit all the spots inside her because she came like a freight train. She was going to remember this position for later as well. She liked it.

Joanna laid down next to Hap and kissed his shoulder. He looked like he was a million miles away, but had a small smile on his lips.

"Have to say, this bullet wound did spice up the sex life."

"Didn't take much, we didn't have one a week ago," he answered, but his mind was still somewhere else.

She pinched his nipple. "You like it!"

"Sure do." He took her hand to stop her from pinching him again. "I got a few weeks off so I'll come with you."

"I live with people."

"Will I hate them?"

"Yes, all of them." She kissed his chest. "But my room is clean."

He turned his head and looked at her with an even bigger smile. "Will I get to see you surf in one of those tight suits? You're very hot in those."

"Yes." She turned and looked at him, deciding she needed to ask him some stuff. "Koz said you don't get drunk anymore."

"No. I lost control. Don't want that to happen again." He stroked the hair out of her face. "Need to keep that shit contained."

Joanna wasn't sure what to say so she just nodded. She'd been very relieved when Koz told her. It wasn't that she'd been all that worried, but this was one more thing in her favor. Another thing that meant she could relax a bit more.

"I'm still gonna drink," she finally said. "And get drunk."

"Good," he smiled. "You get horny when you drink. And you tend to be up for anything when you're stoned." The smile got even bigger. "Absolutely fucking love it when you're stoned."

He was right and when he noticed her looking a bit embarrassed he laughed and gave her a kiss and grabbed her cheeks.

"Like I said; absolutely fucking love it."

"Got some pot at home," she finally said. "I'll get high and we can break open my fun drawer."

"Stuff you bought in Berlin?"

"Some of it." She turned around and put her arm around him. "There's other stuff in there too. I think you'll like it."

"I have no doubt." He turned to his side and looked at her with a serious face. "I need to tell you something."

That didn't sound good at all and her brain went crazy with all the things that might imply. He'd already said he hadn't met someone new, and that she didn't have to worry about sex bugs and...

"Did you knock someone up?"

He looked at her for a few seconds and then he laughed. "No! Jesus, no!" He hugged her and kissed her cheek. "No. It's about Larry."

Jo froze up. Larry wasn't the first pedophile she'd ended up with but he was the first one who'd raped her. It also meant he'd taken her virginity. When she had told Marcelo he had argued that even if she technically wasn't a virgin, virginity wasn't something that could be taken, she had to give it freely. She still didn't fully believe that, but she loved him for trying.

She'd been eighteen before she had voluntary sex with someone and it had taken some time before she liked it, but slowly she did. Hap wasn't the first guy who managed to make her cum but he was the first guy, and actually still the only one, that she'd fallen in love with.

"What about him?" she asked.

"I killed him." He turned to his side to face her. "I needed... to do something. To make it up to you."

She laid still for a long time before she managed to look at him. He didn't say anything, he was giving her time. This should probably freak her out. Her husband making something up to her by killing a man. But she understood, she really did. This was how he worked.

"How?"

"The Five Pains."

She'd told him about torture methods, mainly since it was one of few things that really caught his interest. That and sex stories. He'd kill and torture people no matter what she did. He thought it was sick of her and even if she didn't admit it to him, she thought so too. But truth was, it was him, who he was and she wasn't much for picking and choosing what parts of a person to like or love. A part of loving a person was to accept all of them, and these parts were all him and she loved him just the way he was. Just like he accepted all the strange things she was and loved her just the same.

"When?"

"A month after you took off. I missed you."

That made her laugh. "Nice way of dealing with missing me." She stroked his cheek. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Made sure he knew I was your husband."

"Good." When he opened his mouth she kissed him again. Then looked at him. "I don't want anymore details than that."

"Okay."

Joanna laid back down next to him. "Have to say, this week flew by."

"Yup. Good week."

"Did you beat someone up?"

"Yup," he smiled.

"Did you kill anyone?"

"Think so, hit a few at least," with an even bigger smile.

"And you got shot."

"Ricochet, doesn't count."

"You hustled your wife back."

"I did," Happy's smile was huge by now. "A good week." He pulled her closer and gave her a kiss. "Very good week."


	19. Epilogue: De Integro

_Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX._

_A/N at the end._

* * *

**Epilogue: De Integro**

_a. again  
b. a second time_

Joanna looked around her room. It was empty, apart from some furniture she'd sold to the guy who was moving into the house instead of her. It wasn't anything she'd need anyway. A knock on the doorframe made her turn around. Speak of the devil.

"Hey," the blond surfer dude named John said. "Is it ok if I start putting my shit in here?"

"Sure," she said. "I was just cleaning up a bit."

"Cool," he nodded. "Thanks. And thanks for selling me this stuff. Just got back from Asia."

"Yeah, you told me." The guy had probably been too stoned at the time to remember telling her that. "There's a move-in present in the bed post for you." Just some weed, she didn't want to drive around with it.

It hadn't taken her more than four weeks to finish things and pack up. Hap had been with her the entire time and now a couple of the Tacoma boys had come down with a van for her things. Hap had made her sell the car and said they'd buy her a new one up in a Tacoma. One he'd be prepared to sit in.

Happy came inside and John took a few steps back, looking at him.

"You ready?" Hap asked, completely ignoring the other guy in the room.

He had hated all her roomies, just like she'd predicted, but he'd been on his best behavior. She had no idea what he had been up to while she was at work, he'd taken off a few days for some club business but that was it.

"I'm ready," she said and nodded towards John. "Nice to meet you."

Kozik and Lorca were waiting by the van. She hadn't been surprised when Koz came down with an SAA patch; the man was really proud of it.

"Ready for Tacoma, Peanut?" Lorca asked with a smile. "I'm with you in the van."

"Nice," she said and gave Hap a kiss before getting into the car. The plan was to spend one night at a motel somewhere, but it was still one hell of a drive.

She turned to Marco who had come to help her with the last, "I'll be back to visit soon."

"And some surfing," he smiled and put his arms around her. "And keep practicing," he whispered the last part.

"Absolutely," she mumbled into his chest.

"I heard that!" Happy yelled as he passed them on his way to the bike. He'd already told her that he didn't want her to pick pockets anymore, but he knew what Marco meant.

"Take care of my girl," Marco yelled back at him, then he turned to her. "Make sure he behaves."

"I'm not a God. I just go with the flow, but I'll make sure he treats me right."

With a laugh Marco kissed her cheek and held the door to the van open for her. "Drive safe and call me now and then."

"I will. Saint Nicholas," she waved and he said the same thing back. That was something they'd picked up from Marcelo. The name of the patron saint of thieves, Saint Nicholas, was what he said instead of Good Bye.

-o0o-

Happy got off the bike and stretched his back. Riding for days wasn't as easy anymore, not that he'd admit that to anyone. Jo looked beat as well, he walked up to her. They'd dropped Lorca off at home and Koz was at the clubhouse.

"Take the over night bag. We'll take the rest of the shit tomorrow."

"Okay," she sighed and put her arm around his waist. "Tired?"

"I'm fine."

He unlocked the door and held it open for her. She walked inside and once she reached the living room she halted. For a second he was worried that standing in there would bring back shitty memories for her, but when she turned around she was smiling.

"Really? Five years."

"What?" He had no fucking idea what she was talking about.

"Have you even been here?"

He looked around and then he knew what she meant. It looked exactly the same. "Not much. Some nights now and then, and to clean."

"It's clean," she said with a smiling nod. She looked towards the wardrobe. After a deep breath she asked. "And if I go in there?"

Now he was a bit embarrassed, but tried to hide it with a shrug. "It's all there."

"You didn't clean out any of my things?"

He threw his saddle bags on the floor, took her bag and threw it next to them. "I need a shower. Come with me."

"You're avoiding the question."

"Yeah, I am." He led her towards the bathroom. "I didn't clean out any of your shit."

"Gonna tell me why?" she asked while she started to take off her clothes.

"I like your shit," he gave her a kiss. "Satisfied?"

His entire body was tired and there were definitely parts that were hurting. Standing in the water while holding Jo did make it all feel a little better and when she traced a trail of kisses down his chest and stomach he closed his eyes with a smile and leaned against the wall.

Her tongue licked the entire length of his dick before she gently grabbed his balls, playing with them in one hand, the other was around his dick. When he never felt her mouth around his dick he looked down and saw her looking at him. The second he met her eyes she opened her mouth and took him inside, still holding his stare.

He kept his eyes on her and that mouth he fucking loved moving over his dick. The tongue now and then swirling over the tip made him groan and he finally leaned his head back again, knowing he'd blow his load much too early if he kept looking at her and he wanted to enjoy this for a while. The light pressure on his balls was released and he moaned in protest until he felt her fingers, tracing over the area behind his balls. Fucking hell, he'd almost forgotten that. Her fingers circled the skin between his balls and his asshole and when she hit the spot he couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"Right there, baby."

The first time she'd mentioned the prostate he'd told her there was no fucking way he'd have anything shoved up his ass, not even her fingers. She'd told him she didn't have to shove his fingers up his ass to find it. And this was fucking amazing. When he was getting closer she pressed harder and that was it. With a loud growl he blew his load into her mouth.

She stood up and opened her mouth towards the water and rinsed her mouth. He grabbed her and gave her a kiss but none of them said a single word. This was one of the things he liked about Jo, she didn't let her mouth run just to fill a silence. If she didn't have anything to say, she didn't speak.

They finished their shower and then he brushed his teeth.

"Oh, fuck!" she mumbled. When he turned around she was holding the towel against him. "You've been jerking off in these."

He laughed, "Maybe." When she raised her eyebrows, still holding the towel in front of her, he shrugged. "Probably."

"No fucking 'maybe' about it. They're all stiff, bet you can't even fold them without them cracking." She glared at him. "I'm buying new ones tomorrow and don't you fucking dare blow loads in them."

After rinsing his mouth he gave her a kiss. "Keep blowing me and I won't blow loads anywhere else."

"I'll get scratch marks from drying myself in these," she muttered as he walked outside, laughing again.

She climbed into the bed five minutes later and put her arms around him. "How are you really feeling?"

"Old." He looked at her. "You didn't hear me say that."

"Got it." She turned around and he held her.

He looked around the bedroom and remember the last time he'd seen her in there. "I came back that night."

"What?"

"After I was released, I came back here. You were sleeping." He hugged her closer and shoved his nose into her wet hair.

"Why did you come back?"

"I thought you'd be long gone. Just came here for my stuff and when I saw you, I didn't want to wake you up."

"Why not?"

"Knew I was fucked. Didn't want to scare you more." She turned around in his arms and put her hand on his cheek.

"Koz never told me that."

"Wouldn't have mattered."

"No. It wouldn't." Her soft lips pressed against his. "What did you do?"

"Nothin'. Just watched you a while."

"Creepy," she smiled. "And a little romantic. For being you."

"If you don't take the broken nose into account. That ruined the romance," he said and raised his hand and ran his thumb over the bump. "I'm glad you didn't have this fixed."

"Why?"

"Reminder."

"That you hit me?"

"More what happened when I did. That I'm out of chances." He kissed her. "I'm guessing that you wouldn't come in for another lockdown."

"No. I'd stay in Berlin forever," she said with a smile and licked his lips. "Think you owe Kozik a big one though."

"I know. Owed him a big one for a long time."

Koz had never mentioned it, not after that first argument. And he'd never mentioned Jo, but Happy knew that she was right. He owed Koz for lot of things.

"Can I ask you something?" He nodded and she continued. "Why the blonds? When I came to the clubhouse."

"Piss you off."

"Piss me off?"

"At first just to piss you off for the sake of it. And then because pissed off is better than scared. Didn't want you to be scared of me."

"And pissed or scared were the options?"

"You saying there were others?"

She seemed to think about that for a while. "No. That was probably it to begin with." She turned around again and pressed that perfect little ass against him. "Could've just been nice to me."

"Like you'd let me anywhere near you without pissing me off."

She looked at him and then laughed, "No, I wouldn't. I do love you tough."

"I know, just needed to make sure you remembered that. I love you too, babe." He held her closer. "Sleep tight, Peanut."

-o0o-

Joanna woke up when she felt a weight laying down on her. Then she felt Hap's mouth on her jawline.

"I'm not gonna get up and buy breakfast for you," she groaned and turned her face into the pillow.

"I know. It's taken care of."

"Who?"

"Called one of the prospects," he said and she turned and looked at him. "Don't get used to it. Just a slip from my side."

"Playing nice."

"For today."

She turned onto her back. "How nice?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"Go down on me."

He gave her a kiss with a smile before moving down. She was already naked after their shower the night before, so he laid down between her legs and nibbled the inside of her thigh.

"The coffee will get cold."

"Then make sure it's worth cold coffee," she answered and closed her eyes when he grabbed a hold of her ass with both hands and kissed her hipbone, moving down towards her folds and carefully licking her clit.

He took it slow, frustratingly slow, just tongue at first and when his fingers finally filled her, he moved his mouth to the inside of her thigh again, slowly pumping his fingers in her. He body was slowly waking up. She moved against his hand and when he moved up to carefully lick her right nipple before taking it into his mouth, she arched up with a moan. He kept suckling her, never missing a beat with his hand. Letting go of her breast he licked a wet trail between her breasts before taking the other nipple in his mouth. That's when she decided she'd had enough.

"Get it out," she said and reached for his pants.

He let go of her breast and looked at her. "You said go down, nothing about fucking."

"You saying you don't want any?"

He moved up to lay completely on top of her, holding her down. "Baby, has it been that long?"

"What?" She wasn't sure what he meant.

"Like I'd say no to that," he smiled and gave her a kiss before helping her take off his pants. "You should know that."

Finally he got up to take off his clothes. Naked, he got down to sit on his heels and pushed her legs together and towards her chest before slowly entering her. She rested her feet just underneath his chest, he was holding her hips to keep her in position. Once again he was taking it slow.

He'd almost always done that. Slow at first before fucking her sensless through her orgasm. The exception being the quick fucks they did now and then. He played her like an instrument and she'd been surprised early on how important it was to him that she got off. It made sense later on, when she realized she wasn't just another pussy to him.

"Hap, please," she moaned when she was getting closer.

His hands grabbed her hips harder, he halted for a brief moment, before thrusting hard and deep. She shrieked. He did it again and over and over until she came.

Hap gave her a few seconds while he wrapped her legs around his waist and leaned over to kiss her.

"Want more?"

"Yes."

"Yes, what?" he said with a sadistic smile.

"Yes, please."

He kissed her nose. "Good girl." And rolled his hips against her again.

He got her off once more and they came together.

"What's for breakfast?" she asked, curled up next to him.

"Cold coffee and bagels."

"Then what?"

"We're going to the clubhouse. They wanna meet you."

-o0o-

Kozik smiled when Jo came in with Hap holding her neck. The ones who hadn't been in Charming were the first to go up to her. That was, the ones that hadn't been in Charming for the lockdown, but had been here her first time around. The others had been shell shocked to hear that Hap was married, and had been for eight years. At the moment, they were staring at her.

He knew why, she didn't look like Hap's type at all. Mendez came up to him.

"So that's his wife?"

"Yup. Joanna."

"And she's a hustler?" He kept staring at her. "She's small."

"Just her size," Koz laughed, "She's not small in any other way." He remembered that she used to say that. He left Mendez behind and went up to her.

"Hey, girl," he said and gave her a hug. "Guess you felt at home in the apartment immediately?"

"Yeah!" she laughed. "Fuck, nothing had even moved."

Kozik knew it hadn't. He'd suggested once that Hap maybe should get rid of her clothes. If looks could kill, he'd be a dead man now. You didn't have to be a shrink to know that, somewhere in the back of his head, Hap hoped she'd come back.

"How's Peanut?" Lee said as he came walking towards them. "Are you bringing your man home in good shape?"

Jo nodded. "He's fit for the fight."

Lee gave her a tight hug. "It's good to have you back, darlin'."

Joanna looked around with a smile, finally she landed on Hap. "It's good to be back."

* * *

_**Simone Santos **__has been a tremendous help on this story, always there for a few encouraging words and a lot of help when I'm stuck. Thank you so much, love. I'm glad I've found you._

_**MuckyShroom**__ has the enormous patience and doubtful pleasure to beta read this. Keep in mind, she started somewhere in the middle so the mess in the beginning is in __no__ way her fault._

_And to the rest of the lovely, crazy and wonderful ladies in the freak circle; __**ozzysgirl, EmeraldJewelSparkle, Kiara8921**__and __**laughingwarrior.**__ Thank you for everything!_

_Finally, to each and everyone of you who's read, favorited and followed this story. Thank you. A super special thank you to all of you who has relentlessly reveiwed and supported me. I love them!_

_Obviously, the idea to this story came from Happy's rap sheet, he'd been arrested for Domestic Disturbance, that set it off._

_I have a sequel in mind, but I need to work more on it before I start publishing it. The next story in line is a Quinn story, called "__**Long Gone Blues"**__. The first chapter should be up soon._


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